PyratePhil

Mad Hatter

I hope I find out some day... :angry:

*Phil quickly jumps up, adjusts his dangling scabbard, and limps off*

Get the hell outta' here... YOU'RE March 5th TOO?!? :angry:

Naw...we do it in the dirt! OOPS - damn - now our secret is out....*sigh*....

-ex's tuna noodle casserole

*sniff*...gimme a second here...*SNORK*...ahh...ok... Rumba, our Mistress, works hard in this place I wonder that she keeps a smile on her face Dealin' with pyrates is no easy thing 'Specially when Fantasy-types start to sing We boast and we post all our perverted kinks We even chit-chat about our kitchen sinks What we really need is a lash of the cat While forced to read "Twill" (Hey, hold up - what is THAT?) When time comes for Mod'ing, she's even and fair (t'were ME, I'd be pullin' out my scanty hair!) Then Rumba, so gently, with words never harsh, Sends us to our room - or in this case, the marsh! Aye, truth it be told, Rumba dear, I may sin I can't let it go 'til the last word is in So, yes, I admit it, I've erred and I've sinned And THAT'S the foul odor that you call "fine wind" Ah, lass, yer a treasure in this crazy port Ye hold yer tongue still as we giggle and snort And post dirty stories and off-color jokes Now, sit down here, dear, yes, we'll share a few tokes

Earth Men Are Easy

Rumba, I can easily start some fresh trouble if it'll make you smile... Good luck with the docs!

Valley Dolphins - whoa, what a concept!

The Bahama dolphins are very different from the California ones... Bahama dolphins have dread-locked fins, drink rum and like to listen to reggae... ...the Cally ones have razor cuts, drink Perrier and groove to the Beach Boys.

Sounds great, m'lady! Just watch out - they have a great sense of humor, and like to play tricks on you if they like you!

We need more pretty lasses here... Nice to see you again, Bonnie!

women

WHOO -HOO!!! shafts / hiney

Short Bobby Gold

(I had those once, but I got an operation) Quilled / butt

I did that down in Key West a long time ago, Christine - it was fantastic! Have a great time! Oh, and depending on the skipper of the boat (if you're doing it that way), they'll either chase the poor things down - I've seen that happen - or they'll be cool, cut the engines and drift into the pod. Hope you get the second kind of skipper.

...Yes... Are you female or male: Dear Father Describe yourself: I Am Waiting, I See You, I'm Down, I'm Running, I've Seen All Good People How do some people feel about you: Wonderous Stories, The Fish How do you feel about yourself: Soft As A Dove, The Prophet, Owner Of A Lonely Heart Describe where you want to be: On The Silent Wings Of Freedom, Future Times Describe what you want to be: Five Percent Of Nothing, Heart Of The Sunrise Describe how you live: Holding On, Perpetual Change Describe how you love: Long Distance Runaround, Real Love, Sweetness Share a few words of wisdom: Without Hope, You Cannot Start The Day

of Souls ...there's certainly enough clowns...

You have many talents, and you are great at sharing those talents with others. ...What, like oral, or...? Most people would be jealous of your clever intellect, but you're just too likeable to elicit jealousy. ...ROFLMAO - oooookay... Progressive and original, you're usually thinking up cutting edge ideas. ...and promptly doing nothing with them... Quick witted and fast thinking, you have difficulty finding new challenges. ...not around here...... Your strength: Your superhuman brainpower ...stunning, isn't it...I'm a Sooooper Genius... Your weakness: Your susceptibility to boredom ...true... Your power color: Tangerine ...Whoa - where'd THAT come from???... Your power symbol: Ace ...Ventura?... Your power month: May ...Oooookaaaayyyy...

You know what they say... "Two holes, twice the fun"...

serenade

Moon

Aww, ok, I'll play nice... BOTH holes are for the face - the heart-shaped one is the standard-issue one...you pay extra for the more comfortable, more padded face cradle - it just goes in the opposite end on this model. The "outriggers" are for the arms, since the tables are kind of narrow... And the "sling pouch" beneath the face cradle is a place to put your arms when your lying face-down. NOT SHOWN IN PHOTO: 1. Deluxe heat/massage unit 2. 6-Pax chilled beverage storage unit 3. Built-in Universal remote control for CATV/Net/HDTV/ICBM 4. Fully washable 5. Holds 500 pounds...so if I ever get lucky with a 320-pound lady, I'm set... 6. Ignore #5 - that was in bad taste