BLACK JACK SHALAQ

OL' BLACK JACK n HIS FIRST MATE SHANGHIA SOOZ WENT TA SEE IT SUNDAY....IT TWAS OK.....ZETTA JONES IS SOOOOOOO HOT!

..mE THINKS IT TWAS...aDAM sANDLER IN THE LONGEST YARD..

YES! YES! YES! GOOD SHOW MATE BUT THE MOVIE WAS "SHE WORE A YELLOW RIBBON" ..BUT YOU GOT THE CHARACTER DEAD ON!...AN EXTRA RATION OF RUM FER YA'S!...GOOD SHOW!

RIGHT AT 1100 YDS.! DOWN 2! SABOT! FIRE DAMN YOU!

You guessed n'er chester! I'll stab at that one n' say "McArther"

....WASHIN' ME FACE......

MY OL' LADY!

COME HUNTING SEASON AND I GET OUT TO MONTANA I LOVE A 12 PAK OF "PIGS EYE" PILSNER. WHEN THAT RUNS OUT IT'S BACK TO MY TRIED n' TRUE, BUD! " I'M ONE BUD WISER THAN I WAS A MINUTE AGO"! BLACK JACK

Migraine? I haven't bothered you for a long time!

Boxcar Willie!!! He rocks!

Oh yeah....Ala mode....mmmmmm

I gotta admit lassie...That does give me wood!

Buffalo tongue n' pigs feet.....

Lover ? My God ! That sounds so.....BORING!........ I'm 47 yrs. old! I spent 22 of those years in my beloved marine corps. I've been in two theaters of combat. and I have 7 tattoos 11 scars from enough stitches to sew together a main sail. I broken my fingers and knuckles countless times. I've been married 26 years and have three sons, one of which IS a marine serving in Iraq a 2nd tour and was wounded on his first tour.I own enough firearms to start a small war. I kin still shoot a knat between the eyes at 600 yds.......LOVER???....BOOOORING!! When ya stare down the reaper face to face....That's LIVING lassie..That's LIVING!! Black Jack

Easy one, " We're gonna hold on to them by the nose n' we're gonna kick 'em in the ass! We're gonna kick the hell outta them all the time! And we're gonna go thru 'em like s*** thru a goose!"

"No man likes being called low down n' high smellin'"! or... "Don't piss down my back n' tell ME it's raining"! and finally "Don't worry laddy, I'm a champion swimmer. I once swam the english channel...with a anvil on me back"! The first two should be easy, but ya gotta dig deep on the last one I bet! Black Jack

AYE LASS....Tis' true! I gots da knotted knoggen n' bruised shins ta prove it too!

I wants a wench that yells real loud when she's swingin' at me soz I gots timez ta duck! Ol' Black Jack ta"nt so light on 'is feet no more.

Yo Rue !! Da best think fer da nasty case of da rot is a shot of warm rum , then chase it down wit "Ben n' Jerry's" Cherry Garcia....MMMMMMMMMMMMM It puts a smile on dis Old Salts mush mouth! Dr. Black Jack

:angry: Hellfire n' Gull gizzards! Nomad sound likes my kinda heathen! Mean, ornry, n' nasty! Ol' Black Jack kin sign on ta a retched klan like dat! Axes, pikes n' spikes! AAARRRRRRRRRG! Whar do I make my mark? Black Jack

I just ate a cheez burger n' downed a couple brews. Now I'm gonna watch some porn n' thump my dummy then fall asleep... Don't tell me mum, okay.... Black Jack

Have ya's ever had Magic Mushrooms wit Budwieser? Mmmm! Black Jack

YA GOTS BLACK JACKS MARK LADDY!

HEY!!! I gotta butt!....It's attached to a boob biting, lip lickin', ass slappin, pair of pythons to put lassies ankles behind thar ears, pirate!!!! AARRRRRRRRR ! OOOHHHHHH! MMMMMMMM! SPANK, SPANK, SPANK!!! BLACK JACK

Aye Bill! I been known ta tip a tankard or two, n' crack a few knoggens in thar!....Tis' a good spot fer a riot ain't it? Say thar Bill, have ya had da pleasure of breakin; a chair or two at the "Buzzards Roost" in Hinckley, Ohio? Black Jack