An old man on a bus was staring at a young man who had the middle of his hair dyed bright red and the sides dyed bright blue. The young man, noticing that he was being stared at asked, "What are YOU looking at?" The old man replied, "I had sex with a parrot once and wondered if you were my son."
A man traveling through Oregon was getting mighty discouraged about the weather - rain, rain, nothing but rain. Eventually, he saw a young kid standing at the side of a road, pulled over and asked, "Hey kid - does it EVER stop raining in Oregon?" The kid replied, "I don't know sir, I'm only six."
During a major beer conference in New York, a few of the CEO's decided to get together socially, so naturally they went to a local watering hole. The CEO of Budweiser stepped up to the bar and said, "Give me a Budweiser - gotta be a Budweiser." The bartender served him. The CEO of Coors stepped up and said, "Naturally, I'll have a Coors." The bartender served him his Coors. The CEO of Miller Brewing Company stepped up and said, "Gotta have an MGB, of course." The bartender handed him an MGD. The CEO of Guinness stepped up and said, "I'll have a diet coke." The other three CEO's stared at him. He said, "Well, if none of you are drinking beer, neither am I."
