PyratePhil

Same here in PA... Go to a gaming store...you know, one of those places that supposedly make a LIVING out of knowing about the latest card games and such... Oh, sure, they can talk for hours about Magic decks or Yu-Gi-Oh, but Pyrates??? (Insert stunned-cow expression here) "I never heard of them"..."Oh, that wouldn't sell here"...they're called WHAT?"... And just try to buy them online from places like eBay - they gouge you royally. Like my son has advised me, I'll just bide my time...sooner or later, people will move on to something else, and I'll pick up a U-Haul box full of Pyrate cards for $5.

Arrr! PyratePhil shanghaied me idea! Broadside Sorry, Broadside!

Dreamy!!! I been missin' yer verbiage, m'lady - the Pub ain't the same without ye! Fair winds to ye, missy!

...to be a BIG pyrate??? Seriously, that's a cute idea. Maybe the little pyrate could do something that all the big pyrates can't, and saves the day because of their "special ability". Maybe they could squeeze through the tiny hole in the cave to get the treasure; of course, they bring the treasure back to town and distribute it to all the poor and needy folk. "Although he was only 3 feet tall even with his gleaming black pyrate boots, Finster discovered that size isn't everything, and that his unique height would eventually allow him to save the children's shelter back in Kissntell, Florida. Although all of the other big-sized pyrates would laugh and make cruel jokes about Finster's height, and would use him as a PLP (Public Leaning Place), Finster's good-natured smile won him many friends on board the old pyrate ship. He had only one wish: to be as big as all the other pyrates." Then of course, he finds out that being tiny is actually good. Etc., etc... Good luck!

There ARE other answers, however impractical or improbable... Just because we know of no one doing it, doesn't mean that there isn't. Granted, a flintlock and cutlass are a poor substitute for an AK, but think outside the box... You mentioned entertainment, aka Disney and Faires. What if someone were to discover a niche profession such as, "Professional Pyrate for Hire- I can be hired to board your cruiser in the midst of your party. Be the talk of the town! I use only authentic weaponry, dress, and mannerisms. Sure to be a hit!" Could you imagine a job or career like that in, say, the Bahamas? Might go over well with the tourist trade. Then you could truly say that you make a good living as a pyrate. Or, you could always sell used cars or aluminum siding... :)

PP... Pyracy Pub... Pillage and plunder... Coincidence, or ??? BlenderWench, Madam Macaw - thank ye, M'ladies.

An Ode to Pyrate Weekend Now Pyrate Weekend is jes' mem’ry and haze, But O, what a way ta go out wi' a blaze! Th' Captains, th' wenches, cabin girls and boys, Walked th' Faire day-long, spent too much on th' toys. Gnawing on turkey be so messy but good Tried out a few pounds of some other fine food. Attended wench auction, but none were fer sale Though I bid on one wench (and she were quite pale). Th' gatherin’ crew at th' Pub ‘round ‘bout 1, Were truly an awesome and fine bunch fer fun. Crimson and IndigoJack, what fun guys, And BlenderWench 'ad endless depths in 'er eyes. Now Moonshadow, please do excuse me dismay, But I won’t go bobbin’ fer shillin’s – no way! Fer once long ago I did bite off a coin, And got me reward – a swift kick in the groin. Me cabin boys two and meself, we did miss th' Human Chess match – don’t it make you just &*%$? We spent ‘alf an hour on dewy green grasses, But all's we could see were th' spectator’s asses. We sorely did miss Crazy Tom this time ‘round, Wi' all o’ his antics, we rolled on th' ground. The Queen were a Lady, it be clear ta me, But now I walk ‘round wi' some ice on me knee. We passed right on by th' old Dungeon Museum Me littlest one were too scared ta go see ‘em, And me, well, truth be known, I don’t go fer larks, Besides, I been there, done that – got the marks. I spent some long time on th’ Bridge O’ Th’ Kissin’, But all o’ th’ wenches I jes kept on missin’. I finally caught a nice buss - on the cheek! O, gee, I’ll not wash me ole’ face fer a week! The best o’ th' Faire, in me humble own view, Were th' meetin’ o’ Kat and er’ handsome nephew. Now, true, m’lady, I might have acted bolder, But didn’t, ‘cause o’ th’ dragon on yer shoulder. And let me not fail ta state ‘ere's and now’s, How much I admired th’ Ladies’ fine bows. T’were put on display fer me ravenous eyes, But all's I could do was send's out some sad sighs. Ye see, it be tough, fer a Pyratin’ guy, Ta get roarin' drunk, or ta fondle a thigh, When ‘long wi’ his ponytail, beard, and fine buns, He’s totin’ aroun’ his two youngish-type sons.

Ba-DUM Ouch...

Don't be laughin'... Back in the days o' yore, when I were in charge o' a group o' "Tavern Security" types, we NEVER wore jewelery, nor long hair styles. Too easy to be fallin' prey ta unscrupulous types...

"International Harbor Of Pyrates"? "I Hate Old People"?

...and stoppin' at Denny's an' terrorizin' the locals! "WENCH! WENCH! Where be me pancakes?"

I kin see th' hordes o' folk comin' up ta me all day long... "OOO...he's got PP on his shirt!" "Aww...are you a PP?" "I can see your PP" That's when me sword starts to sing... Be that as it may, I'll be strivin' mightily ta have PP on me come Sunday. A good idea, but not, I fear, as good as my original one...of everyone wearing a dead rat somewhere on their person...

...but as has been known for centuries, the sea taketh, but she also giveth... As she tried to deal with her broken heart, a body washed up hundreds of miles away on a desolate sub-tropical shore, seemingly bereft of life...except for a sudden, wet intake of life-giving air...

Alas, no - only Sunday. ...one of these years I'll take two days off in a row...

Aye, Mummy!

My personal faves are Empty Hats and Giacomo the Jester - give 'em a try, you might enjoy it! Of course, the Wench Auction is a foregone conclusion...

What you didn't, and couldn't, know is that as he approached the pier, hoping only to have a glimpse of the sea that he was giving up for you, he was shanghaied by a large group of ruffians. His defense weakened as he thought only of you, he was easily overcome and thrown roughly into the black ship's hold. Though it is thought that he is given a few biscuits and some thin gruel once a day to keep mind and body together, the most hurtful event is his long separation from you. Not a cloud forms in the azure sky but that he sees your face; not a single day passes without a heroic battle with loneliness and lost love. His finely-chiseled features tear-streaked as he works at the menial tasks given him, he bides his time, knowing that one day, somehow, he'll return to you, to crush his lips against yours and to feel your two hearts pumping in unison. Either that, or the bastard just stepped out on you.

Aye, me Brother - we be th' Fashion Plates O' Th' Forum! Cheers! ...and Redd - don't be forgettin' the pearls...pyrates and pearls, pearls and pyrates - an inseparable pair... <Bows to Lady Sheila>...

...it be dependin' on WHO be portrayin' me Mommy at th' time, lass...

Aye, whatta let-down... None o' the local game studios even knew what POTSM was, let alone stocked any... But then, this bein' Northeast Pennsylvania, I not be too surprised. There be more intelligence in thet furry purple monkey whot hangs around this board...

...and jes' a-thinkin' here, but... What would happen iffin' a lady-wench from the Old days were ta be popped into OUR times? ...Kinda' sounds like a movie proposal...

Grrr... A Kat by any other name would scratch as sweet... How DARE they be frownin' upon ye, lass! They'll have ta taste me steel when I get there! Asides, I don't ASK fer no-one 'r no-thing - I TAKES! (That is, if Mommy says I can...)

Ye be meanin' thet ye be fer sale at th' local Wal-Mart?!? So let's be seein'...the tally so far be: 74 say they'd not be able ta survive; 36 say they'd like ta give it a chance 14 say "No way, I like me skin cream and MTV" Inter-restin' results, mateys!

...an' a fair shake better'n what most folk have TODAY, I be willin' ta venture...

"...and it harm ye none, do what thou whilst..."