Cap'n Coyote

You were spot on, Lass. Believe me, some days I feel every one of 'em, too.

Got it in one, El P!

Gracias, Muchacho.

A canine tongue's gots ta be good fer somethin'! Don't jump, now...

Damn! 231?! Ouch! Thank you everybody, for your wishes. If it were possible, I would buy you all a mug of your choice of poison in reality. As I am not, please accept the desire to do so as you would the actual deed. Thank you again, my friends. Canis

Aye, Quill. She's gonna be a beauty!

OMG!!! That was sooo terrible! I had comfortably repressed that one til now. Thanks? I borrowed They Live and Reanimator from a coworker today.

Bang! Zoom! To the Death Star, Norton!

No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife between the shoulder blades will seriously cramp his style. *points* Look at the parrot! **swoosh**clang!** *dagger quivers in Grey's pewter mug* I didn't.

Very reminiscent of Will Rogers: "Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there."

Ditto!

Stand down, Cap'n. I ain't gonna convince ye, an' ye ain't gonna convince me. We'll agree ta disagree like civilized pirates, an' see who can get a knife in th' other's back first. (Yer right about TESB, tho)

'appy Birthday, Lass! We 'ope ta see ya in th' pub agin soon! None of us been sticked wi' a needle in weeks! Cheers!

Now capnwilliam, Dr. Hook and The Medicine Show be one o' me faves, an' Shel Silverstein be a brilliant writer. Go easy there, Mate!

It ain't as bad as the Star Wars Holiday Special from 1978, lass. Or Episode 1: The Phantom Plot, from 1999.

Wishin' a fine birthday ta ya both! I be afraid I 'aven't 'ad much conversin' wi' Mr. Bubbles, but I 'ope yer day is a good one. Join us in th' Cannon Room sometime. An' th' Lady...ye be a right saucy one. May we 'ave many more interestin'...discussions! Bring yer kitty cat an' yer whip, if'n ye want.

An' th' shuffleboard. But ye keep showin' new facets faster than I c'n type!

Ahoy, Black Jack! If that's what ye've been doin' the past few days...brother, it was WORTH it! Seriously, though...that is gorgeous. Welcome back, mate!

*bows...well, imagines a bow*

"To help the helpless, defend the defenseless, and defeat...the defeatless!" Yeah...too many times. :)

My birthday! Yay! What a gift, huh?

Dug this one out of the CD stack: Jonathan Edwards Shanty Gonna sit down in the kitchen And fix me something good to eat And make my head a little high And make this whole day complete Cuz we gonna lay around the shanty, mama And put a good buzz on Well pass it to me baby Pass it to me slow We'll take time out to smile a little Before we let it go Cuz we gonna lay around the shanty, mama And put a good buzz on Well there ain't nothin' to do And there's always room for more Fill it, light it, shut up And close the door Cuz we gonna lay around the shanty, mama And put a good buzz on We gonna sit around the kitchen Fix us somethin' good to eat And make ourselves a little high And make the whole day complete Cuz we gonna lay around the shanty, mama And put a good buzz on Cuz we gonna lay around the shanty, mama And put a good buzz on

Aye, in either case, if ye don't end up bruised and/or bleedin', yer doin' somethin' wrong. It's only kinky the first time.

"Two Bits, Four Bits, Six Bits, A Peso! All those for Zorro, stand up and say so!"

A woman finds an old bottle on the beach and starts to polish it. A genie appears and says he will grant her three wishes. "But since you are married," he says, "your husband will get 10 times what you ask for." "That's fine", she says. "First, I want more money than I could ever spend in my lifetime." "Remember, your husband will get 10 times as much." "That's okay, since I will have my own money." POOF! The genie hands her a receipt for her checking account, and there are many many zeros on it. "It's all computerized nowadays," he explains. "Next, I want to be the most beautiful woman in the world." "Remember, your husband will be the most handsome, and will have the eye of every lady." "He will only have eyes for me, as I will outshine them all." POOF! The genie hands her a mirror, and she is stunning. "And for your final wish, mistress?" "I'd like to have a mild heart-attack."