the Royaliste

"Well, I was a' lookin' fer one 'o them garden hose retractors, but it donna' look like it'll fit on me sword belt!!"..

"See's double RR's on stall, thinks to meself, "Ah, much better!! the seatin' is excellent, an' thar be room for, ah, well they do call it, um..."

Shakes three times like a good bucaneer, an' leaves....

...'Enters privy, takes long over-due whiz,...whilst lookin' down to set elevation an' windage, notices knee-marks from Stynky a' kissin' L***a's arse, :) ( Ponders Pirate Molly's uptake on alla this), makes note in log to re-tile the privry floor, tosses note in hole, chuckles to no one in particular', decides to use the other stall in the future, pulls cutlass, etching on the outside'o the door..'STYNKY"S OFFICE'..............

The sailing ship was an exacting mistress to serve. She was all that; she was a heart-breaking wench at times, yet none the less a Cleopatra among the sisterhood of the sea, inspiring an affection the lady-like liner is powerless to evoke.

-Rex Clemens

Stops back at the privy, see's Mab's comment, and decides it truely is a handy gadget to have along on a picnic!....Again scratches in the wall..."For a good time call......"

A toast, mate!!!!...Welcome back!!

"Aye!!!..Cheers, Mayteee!!"

The Royaliste crew gives it a resounding 'Aye!'.....or, 'RRRRR!"....

'Cheap brew starts kickin' in,...heads back ta' the privy, laffs at the limerick, starts to sit down, realising some crude arse 'as whizzed all o'er the seat 'n paper roll...takes last ass-gasket from the box, spreads o'er the seat, hangs cutlass 'n belt on the 'ook on the door, an' continues readin'....

Rolls several hogshead 'o the 'ROYALISTE' finest down the gang plank, tossin' tankards everywhere......"Damn, Siren!!..Happt Birthday to ye, Lass!!!!...Drink ye'reself under the table, an' don't appologise to nobody!!!!".....

"They call me Ishmael"

(Hell, we all know the rest!,...'tis such a fine maritime morning shipboard today, that I just couldn't resist!!!!)

:) Nods in agreement with most...."Aye!..'Tis a wide ocean, for sure!....Sadly, all too many try and force their opinions anyway, continually opening the debate anew.......As this is a contstantly rehashed issue as we do reenactments and ship's greetings, we of my Ship's crew have decided on our own 'course', if you will,...Namely, "FUN NATZIES!!! ...We will stick to our guns to ensure everyone, 'authentic' or 'not', has a rollickily good time!!!...RRR!!"

..Whilst sittin' in the privy, finiishin' me mornin' 'constitutional', I starts ta' rethink the 'fightin' cats' concept...Counting heads, there seems to be enough to' warrant some serious thought to implementation....In a snap judgement call, I duly appoint 'Roswell' official Ships 'Kittymaster', give a call for Jonesey an' the rest, figurin' they'll rightly solve the 'scratchin' order', an' set a bowl 'o cream down, laced wif' a portion 'o rum.. Then I pulls me favorite dirk, and in deep letters o'er the door, I inscribe...."Whatcha call a brigade 'o kitties?'....pull me britches back up, and head back to the Ship......

Okeee-dokee!..Coastie, got ye're addy, it'll be Monday or thereabouts 'afore I git to the P.O.

Seahawke, Sure...need an addy, email it..

A bit more cerebral, some Bach an' Strauss.........

:) "RRRRRRR Pleasure, 'Quill!!!"......It'll be dy-no-mite!

Rollinonthefuggindecklaffinmefrigginarseoff!!

"Hmmm, ..'Royal Mee-euw-rines!!!"

"Jeesh!..Druther 'ave a pirate git me than have a mess 'o pissed off pyrate cats sailin' outta the riggin' after me arse!!"

" Light bulb goes off----"Ahh, ..starts to hollow out pineapple, fill with 'goodies', and create floating grenado to float to the HC" :)

Laffing, I loads another carronade full 'o the 'Kitty Rocha', and waits for another target, as, many vessels are practicing heavy weather drills, and this'll put somethin' in their sails!!

"Hmmm, 'Jonesy grapeshot!"

Starts to reload, with a definite SH*T eatin' grin on 'is face!!!!

"Hmmm", admires texture, takes a scoop, ramrodding it home in the number two gun, pointed to seaward....

"Aye've got the blanks, me Hearty!!..." Don't fret.....Email addy....

"The soundtrack is freakin' grrrreat!!.. All local crew are welcome to a burnt copy...touch base,........free is good!!!"....Goes back to burnin' yet another copy.........

'Notices Jonesy strollin' out from under the wall, wonders if'n 'e's one 'o them kitties wot learns ta use the 'ead, an laffs some more!!! ....(careful wif' that dirk, lass!!..the dentists are a real bitch in this century!)