Two truths and a Lie

[Ransom]

Okay, here are mine.

1 I was an artist model for five years.

2 I was sold at a wench auction.

3 I trod where Johnny Depp trod—also Olando Bloom.

[Jacky Tar]

Here are three more concerning myself.

1. I was a homeless man who lived in Golden gate park in San Francisco.

2. I had lunch with Natalie Cole, the singer and actress.

3. I did time at County. For those of you not in the know, that means jail.

"William I hope one was a lie, or ye was acting as a homeless man in the park! If ye had lunch wit' Natalie, ye was not alone, no doubt. I've know more than a few fellas who spent time in jail, for some stupid reasons."

"So, I'd say one is the lie."

[Jacky Tar]

My three...

1) I did work monitoring the nuclear test ban treaty.

2) I accidentally flew into Russian airspace.

3) The company I was working with, in Korea, bought me a woman.

I'm thinking if you were in Korea, then number 2 & 3 are true, and number one is the lie?

"Everyone else guessed it right, two were the lie! A close friend flew a mission that accidently flew into Russian airspace; his plane did not get shot down and he is very much alive. We both were part of a tactical group which monitored the nuclear test ban treaty; thought this was timely wit' everythin' going on in the world right now!"

"As fer Korea, that were a grand adventure. Despite what ye may think of ol' Jacky, this were a young Jacky and he did not use the services of the Korean lass; much to the chagrin of my Korean hosts."

[Red Dog]

Silkie McDonough you just about had me pegged!

#1 was the lie

I was stuck in the butt but a rifle that was laying across the body of a dead Iraqi soldier while clearing a bunker in Iraq. I just stepped over his boby and a beam of wood fell making me step back and "OOOOFFFF" we had contact! It sank about an inch into my lower right glute.

I got hit during the Panama invasion "Operation Just Because" crossing a street in in Cologne. It was a drug dealer that got me. It was my friend that got him.

My wife is the singer, shes awsome

[Jacky Tar]

Okay, here are mine.

1 I was an artist model for five years.

2 I was sold at a wench auction.

3 I trod where Johnny Depp trod—also Olando Bloom.

"I said before, I thought ye was a model!"

"Sorry, I missed yer auction; is the winner willin' t' sell?"

"As, fer three, heck a bunch of us have probably tred where these fellas have been."

Jacky flips a coin, "Heads, one is the lie."

[Jacky Tar]

I was stuck in the butt but a rifle that was laying across the body of a dead Iraqi soldier while clearing a bunker in Iraq. I just stepped over his boby and a beam of wood fell making me step back and "OOOOFFFF" we had contact! It sank about an inch into my lower right glute.

I got hit during the Panama invasion "Operation Just Because" crossing a street in in Cologne. It was a drug dealer that got me. It was my friend that got him.

Jacky raises a tankard t' toast Red Dog, "The Red Dog has more lives than a cat. Let's hope he doesn't use up any more!"

[Jacky Tar]

I was injured in a street fight.

"Silkie, next time ye decide t' get into a street fight, put yer hands in front of yer face. What kind of bloke hits a lady in the face? I would of gone ballistic on the jerk."

"The car looked nice, luv."

[Silkie McDonough]

Jacky,

I had not thought that the man would punch a woman, why then would I try to protect my face.

On a positive note it was my being punched that ended the fight when one of my friends informed one of his friends that a woman was punched. Additionally I was awarded 100pounds ($50.00) by the courts for the incident.

[Red Dog]

Jacky Tar Posted: Oct 29 2006, 01:34 AM 

QUOTE (Red Dog @ Oct 29 2006, 01:17 AM)

I was stuck in the butt but a rifle that was laying across the body of a dead Iraqi soldier while clearing a bunker in Iraq. I just stepped over his boby and a beam of wood fell making me step back and "OOOOFFFF" we had contact! It sank about an inch into my lower right glute.

I got hit during the Panama invasion "Operation Just Because" crossing a street in in Cologne. It was a drug dealer that got me. It was my friend that got him.

Jacky raises a tankard t' toast Red Dog, "The Red Dog has more lives than a cat. Let's hope he doesn't use up any more!"

Shouldn't happen again, but thank ye for the toast.

I rec'd a purple heart for that too....... guys really deserve this award and I get it for a stupid mistake.

for the record: I'll buy a drink or four for anyone who rec'd the Purple heart, I hold these individuals in the highest regard.

Just remember, a pirate is a patriot to his own cause!

[Red Bess]

Red Bess, if #2 the lie, it's a real good one!

Well, actually...

#2 is TRUE. When I was 14, I was called into the conference room at my high school. There I was met by the principal and several members of a rather conservative church in our town. It seems word had gotten back to them that I had been holding seances in the band practice rooms over the lunch period. This was true -- like many kids of the '70s I was into horoscopes, Ouji boards, tarot cards and holding seances trying to contact Mary Worth and such. The church people told me that I was practicing witchcraft and that conjuring dead spirits was the work of the devil. I told them I appreciated their concern for me, but I tried to explain that it was all in fun, and I could assure them that no spirits had been raised. Also, those seances were held about 2 years before (when I was in 7th grade) and I didn't do seances in the band room any more.

I was mostly just surprised that it had been blown so out-of-proportion, but my parents were outraged that the school would let them come in and do that to me. (My mother was a 2nd grade teacher). But that was 1973, and small-town schools did lots of things you can't do now, anyway.

#3 is also TRUE. I was involved in a fender-bender in 1982. A woman in a gray Trans-AM was speeding down a one-way street and hit me as I was trying to merge into traffic. She jumped out of the car and started screaming at me, but I said nothing. The police came, insurance numbers were exchanged and I limped my car home. My insurance company repaired my car, raised my premiums and I thought it was over. Then 2 years later I got a summons in the mail -- the woman was sueing me for $50,000 for damages, claiming she had suffered injury and lost work due to the accident. My now ex-insurance company got lawyers and I went in and gave a deposition. The lawyers told me this wasn't the first claim like this the woman had made, and it must have eventually settled or was thrown out, because I never went to court. But when you are 24 and a newlywed, you don't have $50,000 and it was a big scare.

#1 is the LIE. In spite of years of disorderly conduct, I have never been arrested. Chased out the Dairy Queen and followed by the cops, but not arrested.

So now you know me a little better....

[Hacksaw Riley]

Cool thread. Here's mine:

#1 I once fell into a vat of Sam Adams while on the brewery tour.

#2 I saw a dead man, truly lifeless, (not a re-enactor) speak.

#3 I played football with the New England Patriots.

[Red Bess]

I'm going to guess #1 is the lie. Since the other two are even less believable, they are probably true.

[Ransom]

Okay, here are mine.

1 I was an artist model for five years.

2 I was sold at a wench auction.

3 I trod where Johnny Depp trod—also Olando Bloom.

Okay, since only Jacky made a guess, I fess up.

1. I was an artists model for five years, working through a So. Calif. art center. It paid for my college art extension classes.

2. I was not sold at a wench auction. To be technical, it was an SCA event, and I was bartered for in exchange for being a servant for the day to whomever bartered the most.

3. I have been on the Lady Washington three times, so yes, I have trod where Jack Sparrow and Will Turner trod.

[Hacksaw Riley]

I'm going to guess #1 is the lie. Since the other two are even less believable, they are probably true.

Correct.

I did trip on a small step at the tour and fell *into* the vat, not truly IN to the vat.

#2 While working in the coroner's office, we had a jumper that had been underwater for a while. With the muscles decaying, the stomach tightened, forcing the air and gases to expel and the body sat upright and made a loud moaning noise. Scared the sh!t out of us.

#3 The Pats came and did a tour of our hospital and threw a couple of balls with the kids. We helped out directing them around and I got to throw a few passes. So, technically I played football with the Patriots.

[Kenneth]

#2  While working in the coroner's office, we had a jumper that had been underwater for a while.  With the muscles decaying, the stomach tightened, forcing the air and gases to expel and the body sat upright and made a loud moaning noise.  Scared the sh!t out of us.

Freshly dead (30 minutes) with air in the lungs, maybe a little moan, like a bagpipe drone! But sitting up? Come on now.....

Were you guys by chance smoking anything before work?

[William Brand]

Here are three more concerning myself.

1. I was a homeless man who lived in Golden gate park in San Francisco.

2. I had lunch with Natalie Cole, the singer and actress.

3. I did time at County. For those of you not in the know, that means jail.

1 and 2 are true.

1. I was a homeless man who lived in Golden gate park in San Francisco.

TRUE - I was thrown out of the place I was staying and I couldn't find a place to stay for a little while, so I lived in Golden Gate Park just north of the baseball diamonds. For those of you familiar with the park there is a small druid temple near the road. I slept in a small hidden enclosure of bushes next to the temple.

2. I had lunch with Natalie Cole, the singer and actress.

TRUE - Though it wasn't an intimate lunch between close friends. I was on the Set of Touched by an Angel and Natalie was that episode's guest. I stood around with her and ten other people eating chicken noodle soup in the cemetary where they were filming the show.

3. I did time at County. For those of you not in the know, that means jail.

TRUE and FALSE - I did not do time at county jail. I slept at county jail. When the Cache County Jail was first built, the public could stay there the first two weeks to see what it was like. Most of the people who stayed there left within twenty minutes because they couldn't handle it. I dressed up as in inmate and enjoyed it to the fullest.

[Red Cat Jenny]

I wanted to change my name and chickned out at the last minute.

I witnessed a strange green flash one summer night

I was almost plowed over by a rock star

[Jacky Tar]

I wanted to change my name and chickned out at the last minute.

I witnessed a strange green flash one summer night

I was almost plowed over by a rock star

1) Is the lie, can't imagin' ye changin' yer name, or ever bein' chicken.

Yer work at an airport, ye could o' seen strange lights an gotten plowed over by a rock star, several times.

[Red Cat Jenny]

Dang....yer right.

an....thanks

[Jacky Tar]

Which rock star?

[Red Cat Jenny]

Oh, backstage at the Jones Beach Marine theater-LI, NY which is a half round outdoor venue set in the bay. Which by the way has amazing acoustics. There's water between the stage and the seats.

I worked for 16 years in the music bz and was ever backstage. A girlfriend of mine near died when I told her I'd take her backstage to Whitesnake (mind you this is a FEW years ago) Didn't care much fer the band, but she was just giddy (There's a backstage pass story that goes with this that Dorian L and William B are familiar with lol guys)

anyway long story short... take 6 foot god knows what - David Coverdale in tall boots going very fast on wet salty planking...and one short cat with her back to him... he was looking over my head at someone and wham! Well.. hello Mr. Coverdale. Nice to meet you. Um give a gerl a hand up? I've never seen a rock star turn pink before..

[Red Cat Jenny]

I sat in the oval office on a white house tour

I sat in the US presidents seat on Marine One Helicopter

I owned a pet chinchilla named Fred

[William Brand]

I'm going to say 3 is the lie. You would have never named it Fred.

1 - I got into a fist fight with a guy who sexually assualted a friend of mine while I was dressed as the Fourth Horseman of the Apocalypse.

2 - I woke up to hear whale song and coyotes at the same time one night while camping on the beach at the Sea of Cortez.

3 - I saved my brother from being killed at a They Might Be Giants concert.

[Red Cat Jenny]

I would say # 2 is the lie. I bet you heard both, but not simultaneously..as for #1 only because it's you

[Red Cat Jenny]

1) OK Wiliam..fess up!

2) The White House tour does not allow you in the Oval office

Why not Fred? He was a little like Fred Mertz..so it stuck

Also called Ro Dent