Caraccioli Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Dear Ladonna Dalton" <mpqbust@adelphia.com> aka Mrs. and/or possibly Mr. Email Spammer, I am writing you to whinge (sorry, not in the market for Viagra just now). So let's not mince worlds and let me proceed with the whinging: If you're going to send me spam emails, at least try to pretend that your email is something I might be interested in. Is that really too much to ask? Take this last thing I received from you. It was entitled: "It whichever combinatoric." What the hell is that?! "combinatoric" doesn't even sound like a valid word! (Although, in fact, it is. The exercise is left to the reader - presuming you read any of your email.) The sentence structure...or rather phrase structure...is utter nonsense! What about this email is there to tempt me to open it? I already know that it's some flagrant attempt to get me to buy Canadian drugs, the stock pick du Jour or something to increase my performance (or length or financial standing or any number of other insecurities you believe I have.) The only reason to open it is to determine whether Schroedinger's cat is, indeed, dead or alive. (No doubt you'll have to look that up too, you wizard of a spammer, you.) I know, I know, you've probably got some random word generation thing that comes up with such tripe and you've got to get your money's worth out of it. Let me tell ya,' pal (or gal); it was a bad investment. It works against the very desire you have, which is to get me to open this unsolicited piece of electronic media and then proceed, dazed and starstruck, to take whatever action you propose in your purple phrase. I hope you bought it from an email your received entitled, "Wonk sipid space jeebers." That would at least hint that universal justice was at work. Love, Caraccioli PS: Wallaby (ROO) is expected to grow by 3500% in the next 10 minutes. I'd buy some if I were you. "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Mermaid Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Thats awesome Caraccioli , my coworker and I were just talking about that yesterday. She recieved a spam e-mail titled: I am prepared to kill myself and eat my dog. I thought that one was catchy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caraccioli Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 Thanks! I used to write stuff like that all the time. (I vaguely recall a particularly scathing thing on Friday casual dress code...) I was watching Cars last night when I finally figured out that the main car was voiced by Owen Wilson. You know, despite the fact that many of the movies he appears in are not really appealing to my taste in movies, I really like him. Maybe it's because the personality of the characters he plays are so opposite my own (er, not including the red car in the movie - I think that's why it took me a bit to determine that it was him). I wonder if he's really like that or if he's just been typecast? "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 Theres a ship! theres a ship!!!! I'm sitting up in the tower dazing as it's slow... You can see past the field over a spit of land and to the Ocean. Out in the channel which feeds NY Harbor I see masts...I squint thinking I'm just daydreaming. Always thinking a ship on the horizon...cooler yet if it was flying a jolly rodger! So I grab the binoculars and there it is!! A tall ship! Under power - no sails, but three masts and it's HUGE!! Unfortunately, too far for a pic..but wow it has made my morning!!! Whoo!! Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blunderbuss Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MORE CHICKENS IN THE WORLD THEN HUMANS SO I THINK WE SHOULD STOP FIGHTING THE RED COATS AND KILL THE CHICKENS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caraccioli Posted May 3, 2007 Share Posted May 3, 2007 Unless you're in Key West. (You will be sent to jail in Key West for killing chickens if you're caught.) "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Chapman Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 In some of the suburbs along Chicago's North Shore, which even fifteen years ago were becoming ultra-wealthy bedroom communities, some of the old inhabitants had grandfathered in livestock dead in the middle of downtowns. In Highland Park IL, for instance, two old ladies had a horse in their yard right into the '80s, and they lived across the street from the train station. When we were working there we'd see chickens and roosters wandering the sidewalks in residential neighborhoods. Some folks still had goats in their garages. Right now I'm doing preliminary layout on a graphic novel set during the Boxer Uprising. I'm thinking of throwing in a character near the end that had been in Ward's Ever Victorious Army forty years previous, and wears his worn uniform, complete with turban. I think I may do some costume sketches of that over the weekend. It's interesting as it's purely speculative as to design details and colors; there are no extant visual examples of the uniform that anyone knows about. Sounds like fun. Pauly caught a bullet But it only hit his leg Well it should have been a better shot And got him in the head They were all in love with dyin' They were drinking from a fountain That was pouring like an avalanche Coming down the mountain Butthole Surfers, PEPPER Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Today is Cinco De Mayo!!!! We're celebrating at work with chips, salsa, guacamole (mmmm ) queso (sadly no tequilla or cervezas) and waiting for Mexicana to arrive.. Happy Cinco De Mayo!! Which incidentally celebrates the battle of Puebla 4,000 Mexican soldiers smashed the French and traitor Mexican army of 8,000 at Puebla, Mexico, 100 miles east of Mexico City on the morning of May 5, 1862. Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Chapman Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 At work there are various types of placards for loads that are temperature sensitive and whatnot. Usually they're shapes with flames and stuff in them. This is my current favorite: Remember: Whatever happens, NO PENGUINS!!!!! Pauly caught a bullet But it only hit his leg Well it should have been a better shot And got him in the head They were all in love with dyin' They were drinking from a fountain That was pouring like an avalanche Coming down the mountain Butthole Surfers, PEPPER Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 Wait till Mad Matt sees this! Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caraccioli Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 http://moviesmedia.ign.com/movies/image/ar...27013939450.jpg Usually they're spot on when casting the Harry Potter movies, but this Luna is not quite spacey looking enough IMHO. I hope they don't write all of her best scenes out (Although I know what a challenge it must be to make these movies when Rowlings adds, what is it?, something like an extra 100 pages+ to each successive novel... Luna is one of my favorite characters in the series. (She and Remus Lupin - although I was hoping for a more scraggly looking actor there, so it might just be me.) I also hope they at least give her the direction to act somewhat out of sync with reality... "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Matt Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Wait till Mad Matt sees this! You will be flogged. And God willing, come morning, you will be flogged some more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hester Posted May 11, 2007 Share Posted May 11, 2007 I'm out of Corona..... Bugger! I do, however, still have half a bag of key limes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hester Posted May 11, 2007 Share Posted May 11, 2007 Trying to decide which is louder -- the group of pubescent high-school kids having a water-fight in the front yard across the street, or the three little boys under the age of seven having a sword-fight in the treehouse in the backyard next door. Helluva a lot of screaming coming from both directions. I assume their parents have gone deaf already ... or insane ... or simply aren't home yet. Oh, the joys of warm weather and open windows! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Matt Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 I just bought a 12-pack of Coronas. Dammit, no limes...... You will be flogged. And God willing, come morning, you will be flogged some more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Hmm....I may be able to help..Were I you, I'd place a key lime over each ear...close my eyes and wish for Coronas and poof! Madd Matt may appear! That would be cool no? Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hester Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Well, Jenny ... it would be no weirder than the rest of my day! Lime juice in my hair again! Very sticky. I'm gonna have to ask Dex to give me a shampoo and redo my dreads. Love your subjunctive mood, btw! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 You're welcome and thanks for adding a word to my vocab! Heh wait till my next scrabble match! Hmm never realized I was subjunctive..but now that you mention it... Have Dex add some beads..that would be cool! Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Matt Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 I always wondered about that whole "teleportation" thing. Would my clothes come with me, or would I show up nekked with the 12-pack to try and cover th' "goodies"? You will be flogged. And God willing, come morning, you will be flogged some more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hester Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 I think there's some leaves still attached to the limes, Matt. That should work -- in lieu of a fig leaf. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Um...is hiding the "goodies" with a cold frosty one a good idea? Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Matt Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Not the BEST idea in the world, but neither were the penguins.... Jest wonderin'. You will be flogged. And God willing, come morning, you will be flogged some more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mad Matt Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Damn stalkers..... Now they wear tuxedos! You will be flogged. And God willing, come morning, you will be flogged some more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red Cat Jenny Posted May 12, 2007 Share Posted May 12, 2007 Well it's Saturday night....Penguins have busy social calendars Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won't help.... Her reputation was her livelihood. I'm a pirate, love. By nature and by choice! My inner voice sometimes has an accent! My wont? A delicious rip in time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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