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You Might Be a Pirate if . . .


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I posted this in "Random Thoughts".... but figured I'd post it again here

YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK PYRATE IF...........

Instead of a skull and crossed bones on th front of your hat.... you have "Chew Redman Tobacco"

You order yer crew to fire the number six gun.... and it takes them awhile to count that high...

You have an eight point buck with a cigarette danglin outta it mouth and a party hat for yer ship's figurehead.....

Your scurvy crew and your inlaws all have the same number of teeth...

You get worried when the ships stores are gettin low on salt possum.....

Befor your crew can run out the guns, you gotta move that transmission you've been meanin to work on....

Jim Beam and Captain Morgan are the only pyrate Captains you can name...

Your Mamma makes the best bar-b-que salt pork....

You can spit tobacco juice and flick boggers with deadly aim...

The reason you went to sea in th first place was to get more time fer fishin...

Fishin, fightin and fornicatin just come naturaly to you.......

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Ya knows yer a pyrate when in Gym class ya beats em all at rope climbin waitin at the top fer the rest and sits thar the rest of the class lookin out.

...and done while holding a knife in your teeth! :lol:

Aye Lady Snow... twood be a site to beholden.

Ya knows yer a pyrate when ya be avin a party and the half barel o beer be made of wood with metal bands.

Ya knows yer a pyrate when at a kiddies party ya be jugglin belaying pins.

Shoots anything that moves!!

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Ya knows yer a pyrate when at a kiddies party ya be jugglin belaying pins.

...or cutlasses! :lol:

~snow :D

with faith, trust and pixiedust, everything is possible ;)

if it be tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

IWG #3057 - Local 9

emmf steel rose player - bella donna, 2005

improv cast member and dance instructor - fort tryon medieval festival

lady neige - midsummer renaissance faire

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Ye know yer a pirate when:

Yer local bartender keeps a stock o'rum special fer when ye come in.

Yer event holder tells ye that pyracy be illegal in these parts, and ye can lie wi'the best of 'em ( from under a really big hat )

Yer event holder is the law... and a pirate.

Yer friends be contantly tryin' t'pilfer yer hat.

Yer friends always know what te buy ye fer birthdays etc.

When yer losin' a fight, ye make like ye cna't be bothered, then poke em in the ribs as they're turnin' away. ( This also be applicable if yer pretendin' ye got soethin' in yer eye. )

"Work is the curse of the drinking classes."

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Aaaarrr... ye know ye be a pirate if'n ye storm inta a peaceful an' quiet place, only wearin' yer underthings, postin' pictures of yer virtual self, causin' all the men pirates to stumble over themselves, and generally raising all manner of Hell and Hades... AYE!! :D

:D:D:D

Touche'

Ship's Marksman & Crab Fiend

Pyrates of the Coast

"All the skill in the world goes out the window if an angel pisses in the flintlock of your musket."

"Florida points like a guiding thumb, To the southern isles of rumba and rum, To the mystery cities and haunted seas, Of the Spanish Main and the Caribbees..."

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Aye! Every pirate appreciates a good pair of boots!

I agree, if only i could get into any of the "pirate boots "they have here so i have to say..

Ye might be a (Dutch) pirate if yer ankles are skinny and yer feet small.. B)

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That sound more like ya be stretched by yer feet from the yardarm.
:lol:

I swear, i tried a big size 42 (which is the bottom of men's sizes) and i got my foot through the shaft only with much trouble..to find out the shoe itself was way too big... :lol:

All smaller size boots..can't even get halfway down :lol:

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Ye might be a Pyrate when littraly e'ry onea the blokes a' school refers ta ya as "That Pirate Kid" And ya n' yer friends go to school in 200$+ Pyrate dress and explain it ter ya Principal as "showin yer Colours"!!

When yo ha' a weapons rack in yer room o' cutlasses when yer 16...

.

When your first impulse at a dance is to jig...

When ya get more pleasure out of brawling, singin, and tie'n knots than watchin tv...

When yer prized possesion is yer Pyrate garb, and yer startin yer seccond suit :lol:

When yer parents give you things like "The Corsairs: Green Album" fur ye birthday, without ye askin!

When yer friends give ya things like Flintlocks a collateral to borrow you (multiple) copies of PotC

:lol:

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