The Privy Wall

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

(a worn, crusty note is tacked unceremoniously next to the TP dispenser..read: towel dowell)

WANTED:

One cannon, preferrably heavy, with accomodations for bootstraps. Lost last one in mutiny unfortunate accident.

Interested parties, please leave contact information.

[Merrydeath]

sign on privy wall-

Lost: one cabin boy, red hair where it ain't singed, blue eye, left hook, scar on chin, scars on back, bitten right ear, 4 toes on right foot.

Answers to the name Lucky.

Contact the Blue Gryphon if found.

[the Royaliste]

Pulls dagger, and carves across everything on the wall.....

'LAND SHARK RULES!!'

Eh , vato?.....

[Zephyr]

I like:

I am not a vegatartian because I like animals, its because I hate vegetables.

Pours Ryann a tankard of Ale fer her.

[Zephyr]

*Watches the HMS Pineapple sail away*

So..... yer all gettin' mighty loopey these days.... makin' fruit-ships n' all...

Hmmm.... lessee... th' bore o' the main guns on th' Royaliste.... wot fruit would be properly sized ta use as shot ta sink th' HMS Pineapple?

*scratches his week old growth o' whiskers on his chin in wonderment....*

that's a fruit Boat

["Mad Mab" Longfeather]

*goes to privy, finds a lost garter, sighs, takes out dagger*

Passion is pretty

An' bare skin is brave

Give *public* affection to yer pretty young knave.

We're all pyrates here

An' we'll call you a priss

If you go to the privy to steal a kiss.

*promptly goes out to bar and jumps on some stranger, plantin' 'im one on the cheek*

--Mab

[Merrydeath]

She is ta Shakespeare o' the ships..and plants a mean kiss on tem pirates too!

"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I`m more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves."

-Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead)

[the Royaliste]

Pulls dirk, scratches in door....

'Stepped outside, when 'wot the 'eck?'

Seagull pooped all o'er the deck.

Loaded a deck gun ,aimed at the pilin',

seagull's hollerin', an' kinda smilin'!

Put a 3 inch screw in some meat inna cup,

Now 'e's a' floatin', both feet up!

(Tuff poopin' them screws, eh?)

*punctuates by stickin' feather in t.p. roll*

["Mad Mab" Longfeather]

(meant to press "backspace" an' hit "delete" instead. arg)

Thankee Merrydeath! Kind words! Care for a drink?

*goes to privy [to much drink tonite], spies feather, takes out dagger*

In the roll there was a feather

Didn't know til it was nether...

Now I got a fyne small tail

An' can't seem to hook a decent male!

Sad day when there's a feather up yore bum, eh?

*Shakes her fist at the Royaliste*

What's a roll of paper doin' in here anyway? This be a pyrate privy, not some dandy's powder room!

--Mab

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

*carved in yet another place...this is one big 'ead to hold all this information*

There once was a pirate called Lucky

Whose fortunes were sometimes real sucky

A yardarm's bad grace

Caught her square in the face

But Penny is somehow still plucky!

[the Royaliste]

"Hmmm, I thunk it wuz the bowsprit!!...Nose to nose, eh?".....leaves 18th century chalk to slow down the carvin' and encourage the period 'taggers'...

[Merrydeath]

Mad Mab, anytime a drink is offered, tis rude to turn it down...Thankee.

Lucky Penny, glad ta see ya up and taking fluids. Heard about your bout wit tha ship, an I wanted ta offer me hand to anyone who ken take on a Land Shark and win!

Next drink is on me tab, matey.

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

Lucky Penny, glad ta see ya up and taking fluids. Heard about your bout wit tha ship, an I wanted ta offer me hand to anyone who ken take on a Land Shark and win!

*elaborate, Bird-like bow*

Thank ya, luv. Heh, me an' th' Shark now 'ave an understandin'...I won' hit 'er if she don' hit me.

[RyannMacGregor]

*elaborate, Bird-like bow*

rather fittin' luv....what with that "spread eagle" and all from that parade. Shall I ask if ye learned your curtsy from the Hwy. 87 overpass? *giggles just imagin' the whole parade*

[Merrydeath]

*elaborate, Bird-like bow*

Thank ya, luv. Heh, me an' th' Shark now 'ave an understandin'...I won' hit 'er if she don' hit me.

Good understanding to have.. works wit ships, animals, and some pirates.

*offers Penny a drink for her pain-killer, wonders if Everclear would do the job*

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

rather fittin' luv....what with that "spread eagle" and all from that parade. Shall I ask if ye learned your curtsy from the Hwy. 87 overpass? *giggles just imagin' the whole parade*

Nah.

I loaned it from Captain Jack Sparrow.

He didn' seem t' mind..

*shifty-eyed look*

[Merrydeath]

As I've Matured...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've l earned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jack asses.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.

I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

I've learned that it is not what you wear, it is how you take it off.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.

I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.

I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.

I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important

ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent.

[RyannMacGregor]

I relate to toooo many of those. But I'm not telling which ones....

*picks up the chalk kindly left behind and scribbles*

Save the whales..........collect the whole set!

[El Pirata]

I could relate to these:

I've l earned that one good turn gets most of the blankets. I know that one.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jack asses. I know that one.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. I know that one.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think. I know that one.

I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. Learning that one.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished. I know that one.

.

I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity. I know that one.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it. I know that one.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities. I know that one.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. I know that one.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it. I know that one.

I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity. I know that one.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent. I know that one.

[Merrydeath]

(tongue in cheek)

So, ya saying ya be a Know It All?

[Mad Maudlin McCrumb]

Takes a furtive glance around, pulls out her dagger with a grin...

"Free Tibet... with four proofs of purchase"

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

No writings today, but apparently someone decided to put some mult-colored lights in the privy....complete with a few touches of tinsel...

[El Pirata]

What fer???

[Lucky Penny Hawkings]

Dunno.

Though I suspect it has something to do with the inability to put up aforementioned lights in the new digs yet.....

[Scupper]

There once was a pirate named Tweedy

who played with his twig named Petey

When caught by in the act

he said give er a whack

And paid for being greedy

by ending up being real needy!