Jacky Tar

"Roberts, walk wit' me a bit." I motioned t' the large man t' follow me topside.

"I don't know if Nate wants off this ship so bad, that he'd be crazy enough t' bring the wrath o' the Spanish down on us. But right 'fore he fell on that cannon, he stood on this deck an questioned my orders on loadin' those same cannons."

Roberts nodded, so I continued, "We've been in rollin' seas before, wit' pitching decks, an I've never had any man jack accidently fire a cannon!" I paused t' consider the Spanish galleon 'fore us, now.

"However, I'm willin' t' allow Red Cat t' take one o' the long boats, wit' Nate as crew, if you'll accompany them t' the Rakehell. I don't want any harm befallen her, an I need t' get a message t' the captain o' the Rakehell."

"But first, I need t' see wot' demands the Spanish are 'bout t' put upon us, an insure they won't open fire on any boats we might put in the water. Wot say ye, do we hav an accord?"

baja battered shrimp tacos

tax calculations

tax accountant

herself

nom de plume

sour puss

"Who the bloody hell fired on them!" I screamed. I wanted t' keelhaul, someone.

"Stones, take the helm." I shouted, as the Spanish raised the flag of truce. "I'm goin' below, t' get t' the bottom o' this." As I passed Silkie, I bellowed, "Raise the white flag, 'fore they change their minds."

As I reached the gun placements, I screamed, "Who gave the order t' fire?"

Dillard mumbled something 'bout Nate's stumblin' accident, and I replied 'fore he could finish, "Then Mister Dillard clap Nate in irons an lock him up safe, for we can ill afford another accident!"

"The Spanish have raised the white flag. Mister Roberts secure these cannons." I said more calmly, as I returned topside.

"Hold yer fire Mister Dillard," I screamed.

The Rakehell was listin' t' starboard an runnin' fer the north lakes, an her attackers now had their guns pointed in our direction.

"Steady, lads. Hold yer fire, if we're t' hav any chance at all, it must be a full broadside!"

"Stones, cut us free o' this anchor... Now!"

I yelled t' Jonesy, who was aloft, "Give me any canvas ye can!"

Dillard shouted, "Mister Tar, the Rakehell is coming back around, and she's has gun portals open!"

"Mister Roberts, belay the drills. On my orders, and my orders only, prepare t' return fire." Roberts moved like a cat, grabbed Nate by the scruff and hauled him below t' the gun deck.

We had no time t' weigh anchor, so we had t' disable the Rakehell fast.

"Mister Dillard, load chain shot on the forward gun an prepare t' fire on the Rakehell!" I shouted.

"I'm thinkin' were goin' t' need more cannons," I said t' Red Cat. "The captain o' the Rakehell is a women, and like most, as unpredictable as the wind."

Red Cat grunted. Once again, I'd fergotten she was a woman. With the smudged face, ill fittin' clothing, and hair tucked under her cap, it was an easy t' make that mistake.

I cleared my throat, an said, "Current company excepted, I can always predict ye'll do wot helps line yer pockets." With that, she stopped jinglin' her pockets, and turned t' watch the Rakehell sail away.

"Roberts, continue wit the drills an fire a few partin' shots, away from Rakehell." I said, "Have Nate here load round shot for the next salvo."

I snarled back, at Nate, "Aye, round shot!"

"Nate, I'm not in the habit o' repeatin' orders when I give them. Until I know her intentions, we'll stand ready."

"I'd load anvils, if I had the guns t' shoot them. This is a pirate bay, that is a pirate ship, and we hav no business wit' their captain. If she runs up a flag o' truce, we might parley."

I gave Nate an incredulous look, and said, "Nate, you've met the hellcat that captains that ship. Wot would make ye think we could take that ship?"

Nate looked dumbfounded, so I continued, "Load round shot an don't spare the powder."

Welcome Faad! I hear tell lawyers make great pirates.

Our English around here is not so good too.

No one said wot Merrydeath is in fer?

I hope they don't remove her sense o' humor, and send her back in good workin' order.

'Eyes, I've seen yer pics o' late, an ye make a better lookin' pirate than I (Birkenstocks or not). Hope t' see ye in Corona.

I hope the weather is cool in late April, an Herself is able t' attend, too.

(Seein' the softies welcomed here, banner.)

Aye, details please!

"I'll be damned," I said. "Mister Dillard, prepare the swivel gun, an fire a warnin' shot across the bow o' that ship. Mind ye, across the bow not in t' the powder magazine, Mister Dillard!" As temptin' as that might be, I thought.

Dillard smiled, a wicked smile, all too happy t' comply wit' that order.

"That should give 'er pause," I mumbled. "How did she find us?"

I turned t' Red Cat, an said, "We'll be tradin' wit' locals fer some provisions, we'll be needin' in Florida." I paused, "See if ye can roust Roberts, he'll be takin' the watch while we're away."

Kenneth, nice assortment o' weapons, mate; where did find the cutlass?

Pull!

"Nay, that wasn't an IRS agent... just openin' the aspirin bottle."

Tax season.

"Don't ye wish it were open season on those guys!"

Open Season

"Furry critters in control."

Snickering, "Aye, by all means, sit in the good captain's lap. We need more wood fer the fire."

Over the Hedge

If'n m'own schedules allow I'll come by indeed and have at your hospitality!

...

Hope to see you soon....

Does this mean Herself is wilin' t' brave Corona _ell this year?

Aye, this will be a gatherin' not t' be missed then.

I glanced at the nervous Red Cat, an said, "It's a bay were sailin' in t', not the mighty muddy! I don't want t' run aground o' any sand bars. We'll find safe harbour in the bay, an take the jolly boat in t' the bayou."

Happy Birthday t' the rose wit' out thorns, BriarRose!

I do hope the lads took care of ye, lass.

Belated Birthday wishes, Maeve!

Also, nice t' hear you an the new addition are doin' well.