hurricane

You might be a pirate if... You head downstairs to the basement and tell you're wife 'you're going down below.' The only thing you can do on your backyard deck is pace back and forth and scan the horizon looking for enemy ships. Your wife asked you to clean the bedding and you ask her if she means the mainsheet or the mizzin'. You find yourself tying your kid's shoes with a bowline. Conversation suddenly stops at your inlaw's dinner table when you say something totally inappropriate, then cover with, "Everybody's thinking it. I'm just saying it." You are making love and you suddenly shout, "Get ready to board her mates. She's ready to plunder." Your mate has heard this many times... too many times. -- The Captain

Our experience is very informal - hacking and thrusting at one another with blades. Nothing fancy, more something you'd probably see on deck historically than any fancy footwork or blade work. After all, the cutlass was mostly made for hacking wounds into people, not as a defensive tool from what I've seen. So we hack and thrust, use belaying pins, ropes, boarding axes, anything we can get our hands on in the heat of a battle. We don't work on stage combat because most of it is to, well, theatrical looking. Blades don't sound authentic unless that smashed against one another - same with punches -- 'course, we don't punch because that would create some real damage. That said, some of the crewe is about to begin fencing and sword fighting formally. And I think that's a great pursuit as well... just not my thing. But I've seen the faces of folks all gussied up in business attire gawk and run when they hear two blades smash against one another in a ballroom as we begin an impromptu fight over a wench. Now that's fun! -- The Captain

How about Diosa de la Rosa... I think that even means something in spanish, hmm! :) And Augustus de Muerta . .. I should have name Wrong Way that - part Augustus Gloop from Willy Wonka mixed with death... -- The Captain

There's a city there near the winery? Wow! Who would have guessed (hic)... Found a distillery in Florida as well. Empire Winery and Distillery. I sense a Road Trip... -- The Captain

Here's the rules the Pyrates of the Coast sail under... the articles if you will... Pyrates of the Coast Articles As a representative of The Pyrates of the Coast, I solemnly agree to abide by these articles for the duration of the voyage: 1. A crewe member shall have fun at all times. 2. A crewe member shall always pace him- or her- self. Obvious public drunkenness is not allowed and you risk being sent home. 3. When the group leaves, everyone leaves. 4. Excessive public displays of romantic prowess are not in the interests of the The Pyrates of the Coast. Predatory practices are forbidden. 5. A crewe member is courteous and polite at all times and shall not use foul or vulgar language when in public. A crewe member always allows a member of the public to go first. 6. A crewe member shall not point his or her weapon at the public and shall use extreme caution and discretion when allowing the public, particularly children, to hold weapons. 7. A crewe member shall not intentionally damage or destroy another's property. Stealing, either from a fellow crewe member or the public is cause for immediate dismissal and expulsion. 8. Gimmicks - active or inactive - are the exclusive possession of its innovator. No other crewe member shall adopt a similar gimmick without the creator's permission. 9. Stickers are not to be placed on establishment furnishings, glassware, etc. Further, a crewe member shall use good taste when placing stickers on members of the public. 10. When an establishment or patron buys a crewe member a drink, he or she shall order a well drink, unless he or she is willing to pay for a specialty concoction. 11. A crewe member never expects "freebies" on a voyage. He or she is always ready and willing to pay for everything. If you don't have the dough, don't go. 12. A crewe member shall always crewe member never argues in public. 13. When on a voyage, a crewe member is always sure to be well groomed and attired in clean, well maintained clothes and equipment. T-shirts and other "civilian attire" are not allowed. That pretty well covers it - works for all of us at least... -- The Captain

So I'll be steering a wide coast from those states that require that - don't do that peace tie thing. See it as unecessary for our crewe. -- The Captain

Hi confusing accent guy! Who in the 'ell takes a weapon ever through airport security? No one has ever been allowed to take a cutlass or pistol on board a plane, peace tied or not that I know of. Even in 1984 they seized obvious toy flintlocks. So this is nothing new in the airports of the U.S., '84, '97 or 911 (hut-hut-hike!) I know it's not 1997 any longer. But we (The Pyrates) play this gig all the time all over the country - fully rigged in weapons - and no one has ever asked us to remove the weapons or peace tie. That was my point. It's kind of sissy.... and downright unpiratical. Does anyone else do this when they're roaming around in public, visiting bars, interacting with the public? I'm really curious. The thought would never occur to us. And yes, we even pull out our weapons in public and hand it to the kiddies. Never had an incident in 22 years. -- The Captain

That's right Blackie... I forgot. So that narrows it down to Sheila... Perhaps the shaking got to her... :) -- The Captain

I've crashed and roamed several boat shows over the years. People love it. And I just pay my way in so they have to treat me nice. Hundreds of photos... lots of buzz. Spruces up a show a bit when a pirate sails in. Also, what's all this about peace tying stuff. In 22 years I have never peace tied my weapons and not a single person has asked by to take the weapon off or tie it. Not very piratical now isn't it? And no, no one in those years has ever tried to pull it out (the sword :) either. Guess that's a Ren thang, eh? -- The Captain

I've been in the bilge for the last several days, picking up Jasper's refuse on the floor. At least I hope it was his - came home from delivering all our guests to the airport and now there was none on the floor. Hhm, who was it, lads and lasses? Do I have to get DNA samples? -- The Captain

I can throw in a Ronco Egg Scrambler, a VegiMatic and some of that spray hair stuff... -- The Captain

Monkey is getting pretty preturbed at this nonsense. He just smeared banana remains all over my quarters... not good. Skot, did you say you clean? the Captain

Let us know when your course is set and we'll provide you with some great "to dos while you're here" and we'll be happy to meet up with you... -- The Captain

And we'll throw in the toaster Paisley just gave us for a limited time... -- The Captain

Where are the Animal and Doc? Are they down below up to no good or is this a man (woman) overboard situation? Can someone apprise the captain about these things? -- The Captain

What goes on between a man, his dog and his monkey is between him and the sheets. Besides, Diosa was there too, so it was a Manage a Ahhhhhhhhh! -- The Captain

Depends... which outfit. I have garb for 12 straight days with no dupliates. Some - total authenticity, others more party pirate oriented. Depends upon the mood, the gig and what's clean at the moment. Only hand sew things like trim on hats... the sewing machine was a great invention regardless of period, so why no use it... The Captain

The crewe just returned from a very successful pub run in Mount Dora. Sheila stunned everyone on the Mexican restaurant with her bottle trick, the captain broke the puzzle game at the local bar, Diosa tried a Rumrunner and the Captain benefited from her not liking it, OriginalCynn zinged Nigel countless time and Black Skot's trip back from PiP has now become something of a legend... All in all, a good day and Mount Dora will never be the same. And no one will be able to eat Fritos or tunafish again. But we did get invited back - so a good sign, eh? FOTOS!!!! coming soon. The Captain

The crewe voted and it's chicken gravy... Diosa, Sheila, Deadly Aim and Black Skot all say hi by the way... -- The Captain

I don't know if Diosa would find reviving cockroaches in the micro amusing. It's her kryptonite... but I'd sure like to give the freeze/thaw thing a try. -- The Captain

I've been to both and prefer the Magic Kingdom at DisneyWorld. Plus you get four parks and two water parks plus DisneyQuest and Pleasure Island to keep you busy. Our crewe's heading off to PI tonight... -- The Captain

I love cockroaches. They taste great with a little gravy... Bring em on!!! -- The Captain

Very nice - too bad I just bought a new guitar for pirooting last night. Otherwise my hand would be on the keys to buy. -- The Captain

An addendum... The thermometer may be slightly used... -- The Captain

I see we're having a relief effort for our northern crewe who have experienced bouts of frigidity, hypothermia and icicles hanging off vital body parts... I am throwing in the following items: 1. A thermometer (rectal) for taking the temperature in Seattle and Chicago. 2. Two ice trays (to fill with water - we have to pay for ice here in Florda in January). 3. One cut of "The Weather is Here, Wish You Were Beautiful" emphasizing the phrase, "If it doesn't work out there'll never be any doubt that the pleasure was worth all the pain." 4. All my old sweaters... who needs them here - still wearing my shorts. I hope others here in the sweltering south will be as generous with our suffering northern crewe in this time of tumult. -- The Captain