Mission

Happy Birthday, Ed. (Even though I don't believe you've ever read this forum... :angry: )

Ah, my crew. To all of you who captured me and forced me to irrigate you regularly and with considerable malice. It brings a tear to the eye. (BTW, WTH is up with all these self-proclaimed "independent" pirates? Pirates forced the wayward to join crew, you know...)

:P (And yet we've never met! Have we?) Thanks for the good wishes everyone! Now make sure you forget you ever heard this by the time next year rolls around, please. (No, I don't want any wenches spanking me. Neither do I want to spank them, thank you very much.)

It belongs to Stynky. I believe he said he got it with the $20 for his unisex hat with the idea of buying mead. (How is it that everything comes back to that miserably yummy mead?) I think you're on the right track, though. You should sign it. add the location and send it to some random person whose address you happen to have from the pub. (I don't believe any of you have my address, so I feel safe in suggesting this absurd idea.)

So true. That's the bummer about staying off site. You do get a good night's sleep (or good morning's sleep, as the case may be), but you always wonder what's going on that you're missing.

10. You feel compelled to cut out cardboard buckles, paint them gold and put them on your tennis shoes for some reason. 9. You can't understand why people aren't constantly asking you to be in their pictures anymore. 8. You find yourself missing the usually noxious smells of gunpowder, tobacco pipe smoke, campfire and three day old sweat. 7. You buy one of those dopey sound machines to play the sounds of waves crashing on the beach. *sigh* 6. You patiently explain to your spouse (roommate/significant other/parents/cat) that henceforth the dining room and kitchen must really be referred to as "the ordinary." 5. People keep calling you by your given name which really confuses you. ("But my name is Mission...") 4. You find yourself patiently explaining to the local barista that s/he must put your coffee into a pewter tankard or it won't "look right." 3. (Unless Stynky stole your mug, that is. Bastid!) 2. You feel naked without sixteen pounds of what would normally be called "useless crap" hanging from your belt. 1. This forum is once again the first place you look on the board when checking in - mostly to see what new developments have taken place...for an event that actually ended last week!

I concur - those are beautiful pictures, Silas. Here's a couple more from the Mission/Mary Diamond's camera private collection

Ah no mate, sorry I can't even say that I know what it looks like. So you do doubly suck. Of the list of things you stole, three of them were mine. You're paying the postage, right?

“Throughout the sailing ship era, the ships’ decks, sides, masts, yards and sails were frequently set on fire in battle and buckets of urine were used to extinguish the flames…. In close action, ships were often known to set each other alight.” (Vice-Admiral Sir James Watt, “The burns of seafarers under oars, sail and steam”, Injury: the British Journal of Accident Surgery, Vol. 12, p. 71) Who needs portajohns?

...is that you get back all full of memories and bonhomie toward your fellow Pub members and you just don't give damn all for trite things like Christmas and the day to day routines of life. I remember looking at Christmas and shopping and all that stuff last year and thinking how wan it seemed by comparison. Even as the colors fade and wash out of the cherished PiP memories, I still find myself looking at life as it as and thinking, "Reality just doesn't compare." It won't do." Ya' know? Curiously, PiP is the only event where this sort of ennui sets in for me. The other events are fun and everything, but somehow they're stuffy and too formal in comparison.

If you'll recall sir, I deliberately ran away from you despite several entreaties to come back. (My mug was always full and I duly noted that it was you pouring the nectar in every time I took a sip. As the horizon dipped and swayed of its own accord, I knew I had to get away from Mr. Mead and go find some water.)

Stynky, old man, you didn't respond to my outburst. Do you, in fact, have a pewter mug with a glass bottom and a dent near the top?

No doubt you're wondering what what to do for hornet, wasp and bee stings. It takes a complicated medicine to cure such things, so I'll let Stephen Bradwell explain it for you. "Sometimes these creatures leave not their sting in the place, but when they doe, the first course it to picke it out: And then, if it be a Hornet, as it is the more dangerous, so there must be the more care had of it. If the Sting will not easily be gotten out, lay to it a poultis [poultice: soft moist mass, often heated and medicated, spread on cloth over the skin to treat aching, inflamed, or painful parts of the body] made of leaven, wood-ashes, and sallet [salad] Oyle mixed together. Or bath it with Childes urine good and hot. And when it is out, wash the wound with a little water & salt mixed with thte juice of Rue [strongly scented evergreen subshrubs in the family Rutaceae, native to the Mediterranean, Macronesia and southwest Asia]. Then burne it, or els sucke it as was sayd before: and after that, apply to it a little lint dipped in old Andromachus Treacle [a honey- or molasses-based antidote] mixed with Honey; and over it, as also over all the swelling, lay a poultis made of fresh Cow-dung mixed with Barrowes grease [hog's lard], or sallet Oyle." (Bradwell, p. 46-7) "First therefore, the Sting [of a bee or wasp] is to be taken out, as is said, and presently the place to be annoynted with Honey, and covered from the ayre. If this prevaile not (as with most it doth) borune it, or sucke it: and applie Treacle of Andromachus or Mithridate [a complex remedy with as many as 65 ingredients, used as an antidotem said to be created by Mithridates VI of Pontus] mixed with Honey. Or, for the poorer sort, fresh Cow-dung or dogs dung mixed with sallet Oyle. And, if need be, give the partie some inward Antidote; such as have been before commended. Or else for present speed, Take Garlicke boyled in white wine, or strong ale. Or els, the seeds and roots of Lillies boyled in Beere. Or the seeds of Mallowes [or Malva - a genus of herbaceous annual, biennial, and perennial flowering plants in the family Malvacea] boyled in water, and whitewine, with a little Vinegar. Not long agoe I saw a young man stung in the eye-ball with a Bee, while he was too closely looking into the doore of the hive: But the Bee left not her sting there. Upon the place, I tooke a handfull of Carduus benedictus [blessed thistle] newly gathered, pounded it into a morter very fine, and mixed it with the white of an egge, so spreading it upon a pledget of flaxe, I laid it to the eye, and as it waxed dry, renued it twice. This Playster of Carduus is excellent to recover the eye if any venomous juice be spurted into it, or if the eye be hurt by a corrupt ayre, which the common people call baslting: It easeth paines; taketh away bloudy spots in the eyes; and is good for all burnings in, or about the eyes." (Bradwell, p. 48-9)

Here's something I'm certain you'll all enjoy. I'm planning to do an example of this one at PiP next year. Anyone want to volunteer to be the patient? http://www.markck.com/pages/Piracy/Surgeon_Pgs/Proced_Trepanning.htm Thus much of the Glyster Sirring.” (Woodall, p. 18-20)

Probably half my iPod music selections are movie soundtracks. You want me to pick? Well, here's some based on recent listening, in no particular order. 1. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom 2. POTC: DMC (These first two are the suckiest movies of the series, but they are the best soundtracks. Ironic, isn't it?) 3. Steamboy 4. On Her Majesty's Secret Service - Expanded version. Journey to Blofeld's Hideaway is a track so beautiful it makes you ache. 5. Tomorrow Never Dies - the uncut version, not the original studio version. The uncut version is amazing. There are many highlights but Bike Chase is a personal favorite. 6. Addam's Family Values 7. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban 8. Cowboy Bebop 9. The Big Bounce There's more...so many more. That's a good sample, though.

Hmm...many of these pics seem to be of me. How did I take pictures of me?

Mary uploaded all my pics and decided that since I took them, she would only share the link with me. (God bless ya' girl.) So I am holding certain pics for ransom... Here are some samples. You can pm me for the prices on what it will cost not to publish the one's I decided not to reveal.

When I first saw this thread I thought, "That's not for me. I just spent five days pouring buckets of prose diarrhea out explaining "special" moments. I have no right to say anything here." But some of that is just reporting and I got to maundering over it this 'morn and...well, sorry folks, you get a dose of the highlights for me. At the close of last year's journal I said "Great people make for a great hobby" and it still holds true. So here goes (there are so many to choose from...) Enjoying my favorite meal in my favorite restaurant with the most amazing person I have met recently in full garb while listening to a recitation from the back of a wine bottle. *Sigh* Why isn't real life like this? Cutting fruits and vegetables with MAD Dogge, who has hidden depths that I confess I had never suspected. To you, sir. Parking my pickled carcass in Deadeye's close, comfortable candlelit ashram. I stopped there because he had a bottled water in his hand and I knew I needed some. I wound up listening to a philosophical explanation the likes of which I'll bet he only occasionally shares with the lucky few. Nestling into a spot in the sand in front of the small campfire on the beach with Josh and Anna and getting totally caught up and schooled in what Star Wars has become these days. I recall being Josh's age and seeing it for the first time. I'm glad the tradition continues. Having one of those rare, brief heart-to-heart discussions with amazingly lovely Mary, who is truly a diamond among women. Few people see past my system of self-imposed rules, ideas, self-important proclamations and nonsense. Mary is one of them. She takes care of things and people like no one else. Mark, you lucky sod. Finding out how wrong I was about the way a hanging can work. Being corporal on the much overshadowed MAD Dogge cannon crew. The man runs a tight ship and knows the ways of the crew from more than a decade of Civil War experiences. He makes you want to get all the commands just right. Talking quietly with Stynky about the Pub and his philosophy of life over the first bottle of mead in the corner of the pub. Stynky, my friend, I don't know why exactly I like you, but I most surely do. Trying hard to focus on the topic at hand while learning the history of some very interesting tattoos on the most lovely, tantalizing canvas I can recall. Observing Patrick in his subtle efforts to make sure everyone escaped unscathed from a ongoing walking potential powderkeg of a situation. Folks, Patrick is amazing. I've said it before, but if you have never met him, you simply must. Enjoying dinner with the Callahan's extended family on Tuesday night at the Rum Barrel. What a group of people - I was proud to be included in the outing. Discussing stuff and nonsense with Keith and Dutch on the deck of Keith and Lily's home for wayward pirates. Cooking at the Constance School of Camping Cuisine. I appealed desperately to her for assistance on the Salmagundi and she not only came through as only a wizened woman can, she made the thing work. Silas my friend, you have one fine wife and I am proud to know her. Watching the ocean roll in from the comfortable confines of Captain Jim's oar house with a cold beer in my fist while discussing world events, people, places and things of great import but little bearing. The Jim, Mark and Greg jam session on Friday night in the Hide. It seems like a lifetime ago...was it only a week? Watching the moon set with the exquisite and fascinating Jessica on a bench, away from the cheerful noise of the Hide. To have my arm around you and see the moon dip below the horizon is a treat unparalleled. I was powerfully sorry when the geishas showed up.

This is why I try to be distant and stand-offish in the pub.

You apparently didn't train him right. If there's one thing I learned in my four years of wedded bliss it was that the man is always wrong.

Say....Justin looks like he's drunk in all those pictures for some reason.

He whot doth pulleth this sword from ye perambulator is rightwise born King of England!

What?! I'm not coming. No way. You and your freaking borrowed mead are evil. Put you in the previously safe confines of the encampment and... Good God! (Plus I won't have any surgical equipment left...) Don't worry, it's just for looks. I'm want to set the tent up so I can pretend to be cool. You really think I'm going to camp - be serious. Hey, if nothing of interest or intrigue changes between now a freaking year from now, I'd entertain going in halfsies with you to rent a two BR condo (So long as the BR doors lock. With a key. And there's a safe in there.). I'm half sorta' maybe thinking of setting up a chintzy tent with a fly for displaying my surgical equipment.