Red-Handed Jill

Making a couple of vests. One in striped ticking with natural linen lining and a long vest in a spectacular red textured fabric. The picture doesn't do the red fabric justice.

French onion soup.

Well, we did used to call the nuns "penguins".

^ I used to spend so much time in the water, my friends called me Gills. < I can attest to the fact that Liam has indeed called William "mommy". V Pass on William's question.

Crackers and savoury tomato chutney.

Tree topper? Candle snuffer?

^ I've learned to pace myself. But sometimes I have no choice but to finish something and get exhausted doing it. I try to avoid those instances. < Was going to sail today but can't stop coughing. Damn! V Favorite outdoor activity?

Earl Grey tea

Cat Diary Human Translator 'HERE KITTY, KITTY, KITTY...' Means humans want to take you somewhere, most likely the Vet. Avoid it. 'I HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOU!' Probably left over human food they were about to throw out. 'HERE'S SOME KITTY TREATS...' Most likely another foil wrapped appeals-to-a-human Madison Avenue concoction. Real kitty treats are usually opportunities when no one's paying attention and you get to lick the ice cream in the bowl, or jump on the table for that great piece of meat loaf. 'YOU ARE SOOOOOO CUTE!' You are about to rub noses with a human. They can never get enough of our tiny fur- coated bodies and irresistible faces. Human noses are sooo warm. Ugh. 'YOU'RE IN MY CHAIR!' or 'YOU'RE TAKING UP TOO MUCH OF THE BED!' You picked the right spot. You are right where you should be. 'DARN CAT HAIR!' You left your hair out in the open where humans can see it and properly clean it up. 'STOP THAT!' Means you were caught. Remember exactly where you were and get back to it - once they leave the house. 'GET OUT OF HERE!' Do not take this personally. It's usually the first thing they say after you wake them up by sticking your backside in their face. SNAPPING OF FINGERS: They want you to come over. If they want me, they'll come get me. Otherwise, get a dog. 'I LOVE YOU...' Means just that. No translation needed here. And we love you, too.

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home, walking proudly. He walked into the house and said to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?" Margaret looked him over, "Nope". Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed, and walked back into the room completely naked except for the boots. Again he asked, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?" Margaret looked up and said, "Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow." Furious, Bert yelled, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?" "Nope", she replied. "IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!" Margaret replied... "Shoulda bought a hat, Bert…. Shoulda bought a Hat!"

Trader Joe's artichoke and hearts of palm salad. And a handful of pretzels as a snack.

Horoscope writers have 365 tries a year to get it right - sometimes they get lucky and are actually accurate. I'm sorry to hear that things didn't work out. Some folks are just good at fooling others; that's their talent and you should never blame yourself for being fooled by them. And life is funny; it's when you least expect it that something really good happens.

Yikes Christine! Take some Tylenol for the fever and stay in bed!

Back when Windows 2000 came out, the SQL forum discovered a wonderful new bug when trying to use 2000 server with MSSQL 7. If you deleted any of the subscribers (servers the primary server replicates to), the entire system would go belly up. As in you couldn't even restore it - you had to rebuild it from scratch. Microsoft was completely unaware of this bug until it was brought to their attention by the SQL forum. In the meantime, voice over IP was starting to gain some steam and a lot of the companies that offered it used MSSQL. So there I was, at a Cisco VOIP seminar when they started talking about the platform it ran on. Sure enough, it was on Windows 2000 servers with SQL 7 (SQL2000 was just about to be released.) During the break, I went up to talk to the sales engineer; I told him about this "feature" and he called the rest of the Cisco folks over to hear this. Needless to say, they got rather agitated and immediately got on their phones.

^ I prefer to spread my work out over time, but I'm sometimes not given the time. As in "quick - here's something that I could have told you about two days ago but I forgot and now you need to do five hours' work in an hour and a half." But that never happens to anyone else, does it?... <Am also overwhelmed with projects right now. V Would you clone yourself if you could?

An oldie but goodie... I want to see a cannon being used for something other than its intended use (and no, not with the peace flower sticking out of it.)

^ One turtle with attitude and one kitty. < Used to speak French when I was very young, but forgot most of it. V Passing on Silent's question.

^ Natural. Occasionally for an event I might use a colour wash (for example when I go as a harpy I want black hair) but it comes out fairly quickly. < Getting ready for my trip to Phoenix - one day, to teach a class. V Coloured contacts? Or would you get them?

^ Depends on how clear my mind is and the distractions. If a million things are going on at once, it's the calculator. If I have half a million things going on I write it down. Otherwise figuring it out in my head works just fine. < I took an algebra class again in my late 20's just to keep the mathematical problem-solving abilities sharp. The class was fun and the teacher was a good one. V What was your favorite class in school?

Folks know art when they see it. Congratulations!!

^ I'd have to say it is a toss-up between the drunk who made all sorts of noises coming home at 2:00 am and kept subletting to other losers. Or the psycho family I grew up next to: the father attacked a couple of girls with a knife, the kids used to torture their dog and the mother used to throw garbage on our lot. < Heh - try owning in the SF Bay Area. Almost impossible. V Describe your best neighbor.

Hmmm... we got a embossed portfolios rather than a bag. Maybe the packaging was different for each event.

I entertained at the SF event yesterday. Unfortunately, they had a lot of stuff going on in SF that day, so it was very difficult to get to the theatre. We made it, though, and I got to see the trailer three times! And those of us who attended got gift packs consisting of some artwork, a bandana that replicated the one Johnny Depp wore as Captain Jack Sparrow and a beta version of the new POTC game! Tales of the Seven Seas whipped the crowd into a piratical frenzy and we had contests, swordfights, sea chanteys and Marty Klebba! All I can say about the trailer is it was incredible. I'm guessing it's on YouTube by now or soon will be. At any rate, POTC3 is going to be amazing!

I'll be happy to wait and see in May. Really liked that swordfight on the tops'l yard!

^ Teaching the cornerstone class in the highest-rated college program of its type in the world. < Just got back from seeing the POTC3 trailer THREE TIMES. It's going to be great! V Anything you'd like to accomplish?