Making fun of Spammers

[Misson]

Indeed. (I need a smilie that has one raised eyebrow. The kind of smilie that would lift its pinkie finger when drinking tea.)

Any post that says hello and how great the forum is and so forth appears to be spam. I don't see what their purpose is, but these are people with name structures like all the other spammers and the happy emoticon in the title. They never return.

As I was weeding out (yet another) Paris Hilton post, I happened to notice that one of the reams of sentences that they put in there as search terms was, "Paris hilton grage sex tape." I thought maybe someone had invented a new style or word association or some such but...nope. What could they have meant? Grape? The mind boggles.

[Lady Alyx]

For a minute I thought this topic was going to show "Spam" sculpture...as in ham spam...LOL LOL LOL

[oderlesseye]

Aye ...Deep six this one! kajenfina

[Patrick Hand]

"Spam, spam.spam spam...... wonderfull Spam......."

"Shut up you stupid Vikings"

<a kinda close qoute from Monty Python........>

[Lady Alyx]

crusty old lady (really a man) voice..."Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam and eggs"

[Patrick Hand]

This one sounds kinda funny....

Britney homemade spear video

I just don't know how many people want to see a video about someone named Britney making a spear at home......

It didn't say anything about her being nude as she made the spear, but I figure she wouldn't get any glue on her clothing if she made the spear that way.....

[Matusalem]

..and for those who are foolish enough to view it, you know who you are ... and by the board count, WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE ...CUT IT OUT!

[Red Cat Jenny]

I agree. A stronger spam filter is needed..this appears to be a live poster most of the time...

lol now the spam song from Monty Python is going through my head..ack!!

[Misson]

I think you're preaching to the choir. The spammers don't stick around long enough to read your post. They are very clever about how the write things, register names and use IPs. (I notice they have started putting the links in the topic comment section.)

I currently have a list of over 90 unique IPs from all over the world.

[Lady Alyx]

Spam, spam, spam, spam and spam, spam, spam, spam, spam and sausage and eggs and spam...boy I am so starved right now and would eat SPAM....!

Can we have SPAM icon to identify them with...a SPAM smiley face?

[Merrydeath]

some of the spam posts makes points for the spammer if you go to the link.. so don't go to the link or they find out where people are looking at the spam, and then flood that site with more.. ( I need sleep and a some time off)

[Patrick Hand]

SEE.... that's why we have a seperate topic to laugh at them... (and not respond to thier post)

Ya know.... I saw the pictures of Paris Hiltons nipple slip..... sure , she has cute ones..... but Heck.... without potographic proof, I still guess most women here do also.....

(and I'll leave it at that... or else I will get hit.......... )

[Patrick Hand]

Angelina jolie nudes

The wierdest part..... the spammers can spell alla the names corectly........

Dang.... Angila joli........ see I can't spell it... but the spammers can......

See... the advantages of a sixth grade education...........

[Misson]

Angelina's jolly boat?

One of the photos in the Angela post was actually genuine. (I know cuz' saw the movie they swiped it from.) Who'da thunk? Ironically, it made the other pictures look even more fake. (If that was possible.)

[Capt Grey]

Spam, spam, spam, spam and spam, spam, spam, spam, spam and sausage and eggs and spam...boy I am so starved right now and would eat SPAM....!

Can we have SPAM icon to identify them with...a SPAM smiley face?

"Lovely spam, loverly spam. Lovely spam, loverly spam. SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM..."

Here you are Lady Alyx:

[Lady Alyx]

Oh Capt. Grey where did you find that...THAT IS EXCELLENT...yeah can we add that icon to the Spammers posts? Do mod's have that power..that would be hilarious...then right away you know not to go to it.

Geez now I am tempted to go get Spam for Saturday morning breaky. Thick slices of spam fried to crispy perfection and eggs and toast and of course hot sauce! And a good cup of Joe! Geez now I am hungry again.

Yes Patrick you are a genius good idea to rag on them here!!!!!

(ahem..nipple slip...what?....yes most every human has a set Patrick....and yes nighties and slippies show them when we are a tad cold or excitable..he he he)

[Lady Alyx]

for those of us who enjoy Spam.....

Monty Python's Spam sketch

Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of Vikings with horned

helmets on. A man and his wife enter.

Man (Eric Idle): You sit here, dear.

Wife (Graham Chapman in drag): All right.

Man (to Waitress): Morning!

Waitress (Terry Jones, in drag as a bit of a rat-bag): Morning!

Man: Well, what've you got?

Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam;

egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage

and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam

bacon spam tomato and spam;

Vikings (starting to chant): Spam spam spam spam...

Waitress: ...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked

beans spam spam spam...

Vikings (singing): Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!

Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a

Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with

truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.

Wife: Have you got anything without spam?

Waitress: Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.

Wife: I don't want ANY spam!

Man: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?

Wife: THAT'S got spam in it!

Man: Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?

Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines)

Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?

Waitress: Urgghh!

Wife: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like spam!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)

Waitress: Shut up!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg bacon

spam and sausage without the spam.

Wife (shrieks): I don't like spam!

Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it.

I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam

spam and spam!

Vikings (singing): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.

Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?

Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and

the Vikings drown her words)

Vikings (singing elaborately): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful

spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam!

Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam

spam spam!

[Red-Handed Jill]

Oh Capt. Grey where did you find that...THAT IS EXCELLENT...yeah can we add that icon to the Spammers posts? Do mod's have that power..that would be hilarious...then right away you know not to go to it.

Since spammers join the forum and post the same way we do, how would the administrators go about creating a utility that would automatically put an icon next to their posts?

Or are you suggesting they should go in after the fact and put that icon there? Wouldn't it make more sense to simply delete the spammage?

[Misson]

I have a cunning plan... I actually thought of an idea this morning, which I plan to suggest to Booty once I find out a little more info about the board.

For the most part, however, you can't tell a spam registration from anyone else. Their IPs are all over the map (literally) and their usernames could easily be valid user names. The only way to really spot them is to see what they post. Then we eliminate them and block their IP.

However, they switch IPs frequently (either that or there are several of them - which I think is more likely) and they only use each username once, so there really isn't an effective way to do it that I know of. (Except for my cunning plan - which may or may not work. Or it may be too much trouble to be worth trying.)

[Red-Handed Jill]

And I think it's safe to say that most of us here are smart enough not to read posts with the subject of "Online Casinos" or "Britney Spears Pornshot".

[Red-Handed Jill]

Hey - looks like someone is trying to sell a farm at a good price! Better get it while you can. (Geez guys - spelling...)

[Mission]

Apparently "Farm" is short for "Pharmacy" in that person's world. (He heard "Pharm" on the radio and tried to look it up in the dictionary.)

[Red-Handed Jill]

Yes, "farm" being such a hot commodity these days...

[William Brand]

Of the new people who join, what is the ratio of spammers to actual pirates. It seems like we get about ten or more new spammers a week to every one new pirate.

[Red Cat Jenny]

The misspelling is an attempt to dodge spam filters

Maybe we need to start keelhauling the spammers...sigh one can always dream..