Yersinia Pestis

Key Limeade

One pour of Jack Daniels

One pour of Triple Sec

One pour of sour mix

Top off with Sprite

Garnish with a slice of lime

I be a simple man. So make it Jack Daniels. Straight. Call it "The Plague."

Me firstmate who is rocking and singing to me youngest crew member. She sings like a song bird.

Well, let’s see. . . Nasal congestion and pressure in me face. Me throat feels like I gargled with gravel, a general feeling of malaise, and a little achy. I am treating it with a little Jack Daniels and coke.

I have to agree with all of the patrons of this pub. Bring it up, put it on the record. I would take it. But the first time the jerk gets out of line, you must let the hammer fall. If you don't, he will continue, and when you finally bring it up to management, or Human Resources, they will wonder why you have not said anything before. Then they might possibly dismiss it as a clash of personalities.

Ultimately, it is your decision. If he is not worth the heartburn, then pass. But this might dead-end you. If you are not afraid of a little conflict, and what pirate is, then take it.

Ahhh . . yes . . . boobage. I forgot to mention the "plump pheasants." The first mate has a full pair that, after nursing three stalwart boys, these "life-giving breast" still point to the sky.

Here is a good one of one o' me crew.

I'm with Doc. Cold steel between the third and forth ribs.

Sorry about this, but dem girls look like little boys wearing strange clothes.

Me first mate is perfect. Pretty, 5'4", 125 lbs, chestnut colored hair, green eyes (bedroom eyes), broad shoulders, strong back, narrow waist, the finest round a** I have ever laid eyes upon, with strong shapely "dancer's legs."

Good breeding stock!

Did someone call me?

Captain Yersinia Pestis

Plague of the Seven Seas

I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in my brain, because later I might think I'm having a good idea but it's just the eggs hatching.

Thank you Mr. Hawkins. I think I'll take the first mate.

Thomas Tew

Captain Barbossa!

Has anyone heard of a Pirate-themed restaurant in Silver Spring, Maryland? If so, what is it called? What is the address?

Hot buttered popcorn, washed down with a Lynchburg Lemonade.

Done.

I am also Charles VI of France, also known as Charles the Mad or Charles the Well-Beloved! I guess I am not the only on who fails to bathe.

Aye. The little towhead and his three brothers force me to keep pillaging and plundering the king's coffers. Here are a couple more shots of me pirate's lair.

Other angless

Here is a shot of me pirate's lair.

I am pleased to inform the patrons of the pub that PirateMod has made reparations for their oversight. Stumpy and PirateMod have generously extended an olive branch, which I have graciously accepted. I regret that I had to make the previous posting; however, after repeated attempts to contact this sutler without a response, I felt I had no other recourse.

I must say to all who read this posting that I love PirateMod's artwork and the fine quality of product they offer. I hope to renew our business relationship. I also hope that False Ransom can post a satisfactory conclusion to her saga. Bilgemonkey, Thank you for your assistance.

Respectfully,

Yersinia Pestis

The Plague of the Seven Seas

I am pleased to inform the patrons of the pub that PirateMod has made reparations for their oversight. Stumpy and PirateMod have generously extended an olive branch, which I have graciously accepted. I regret that I had to make the previous posting; however, after repeated attempts to contact this sutler without a response, I felt I had no other recourse.

I must say to all who read this posting that I love PirateMod's artwork and the fine quality of product they offer. I hope to renew our business relationship. I also hope that False Ransom can post a satisfactory conclusion to her saga. Bilgemonkey, Thank you for your assistance.

Respectfully,

Yersinia Pestis

The Plague of the Seven Seas

Sorry Mate! Aye laddie, only one good eye, and that one be a bit dim. Besides, you know how lonely seamen be, all that time at sea, ya know. Everything starts to look good. Another tankard for Mr. Tar!

Circle ‘round mates and let me tell you a scary story. Scary, but true. True as the deep blue. Let this be a lesson for ye so that ye do not suffer my fate. There is a company out there in this cyber world call Pirate Mod. Now they claim to be pirate friendly. But they are just pirates of the worst kind. I ordered a framed “Pirate Scroll” from this outfit back on May 31, 2006 as a Father’s Day gift for meself. They immediately billed me Master of Cards and I had no further response from them for two months.

After repeated e-mails, they finally responded to tell me that the frames were backordered. I accepted the response as truthful. About two weeks later, in mid-July, I finally received me Pirate Scroll. I had a place of honor already designated for the scroll. I picked up the poorly taped box and heard the familiar tinkling sound of broken glass. I opened the box to find the scroll crumpled and sliced to ribbons by the shards of broken glass of the framed pirate scroll. I immediately called Pirate Mod only to get their voice mail. I e-mailed them so that they would have the details before them. I explained to them the problem and even offered to send it back. I advised them that the frame was in good shape, I even offered to replace the glass meself to avoid another catastrophe, just please send me the scroll. Pirate Mod, however, does not respond to customer inquiries.

A week later they finally responded. “No problem” they said. “We trust you.” “We will send you another.” “We will even send you a T-shirt at no charge.” Soooo, I bought a new glass at my expense at local craft shop for $45.00, placed it in the frame and I hanged the empty frame on the wall, eagerly anticipating my Father’s Day Pirate Scroll. That was the last time I heard from them.

Well, six months after the original order and being billed $85.00 for the item and four months since being told they would ship the replacement to me, I have not yet received the Pirate Scroll or the free T-Shirt as compensation for my troubles. What has added insult to injury, is that they refuse to respond to my inquiries. I e-mail them daily now, and they have yet to either respond to my inquiries or send my replacement scroll. Caveat emptor me fellow pirates. Caveat emptor. This company is not trustworthy.