John Maddox Roberts

Hawkyns: I've been drooling over that one since I first saw it in the Time-Life Seafarers volume "The Pirates." That's an ocean of drool.

Not navy, but I saw the History Channel's Alamo production last night. They built a section of wall equivalent to the Alamo's and proceeded to bombard it with a Napoleonic style 6-pounder. The crew wore Mexican artillerymen's uniforms and they stood right beside the cannon as she fired.

Concerning firing the cannon by remote: The crew may have been willing, but the insurers might have refused to allow it. Film and tv productions have to be insured or no go, and insurers are notoriously timid.

I recall some years ago reading a book about the Great Mutiny at the Nore and the Lizard. It was brought about by too-enthusiastic impressment during the Napoleonic wars. Having scoured the dockside for sailors and unemployed idlers, they ranged too far inland (just a matter of blocks) and began nabbing apprentices, shopkeepers and other members of the (mostly) middle class. Suddenly the RN had an abundance of "sailors" who could read and write. They began passing letters among themselves and organizing. One day, the whole fleet went on strike. No "Bounty" stuff, they just agreed to obey any order except an order to set sail. In justice to the Admiralty, many of the reforms demanded by the strikers were reforms the Admiralty had been trying for years to force through Parliament, always turned down because they would "cost too much." I.E., might mean that the wealthy might have to pony up some taxes. A lesson for organized labor that was not neglected in the coming decades.

I have a feeling the bastard's cutting a deal right now. If there were ever any WMD's, and he knows where they are, he has an unbeatable bargaining chip: "Hey, GW, I can legitimize your war if you'll give me a nice, comfortable cell across the aisle from Noriega! Think of it! You're vindicated before the world and you get reelected next year!" That would be an awfully hard propositipon to resist. On the other hand, maybe the old homeless bum has nothing to negotiate and he goes onto the garbage pile with so many others. To our soldiers: Job well done! I was one of them once. I wish it had ben in a better war Former sergeant John

Fair enough, mates: I ordered a cutlass, apparently a fine one as reviewed by other of our mates but bought from other merchants, from Lords Armory. Beware of these scurvy dogs! It is a fraudulent operation. They takes yer doubloons and deliver nothing! And (as I noted above) they don't answer emails and their phone # is no good. The other I won't call fraudulent yet, since I've had satisfactory service from them before, but weeks ago I ordered a blade from discountknives.com and have received nothing, neither the item ordered nor an answer for my postal query (their email button yields only a blank screen). Should I get the blade I ordered, I'l be happy to print a retraction, but until then, don't order anything from them. Be warned, mates, there's pirates out there! Gallowsbait Roberts

Just to remind me shipmates where this thread started: Loyalist Arms of Canada. I recommend them unreservedly. This last year I've been ripped off by two supposed blade merchants, so it's good to deal with ethical people. They carry good stuff, they're fast, they're cooperative and they stay in touch. Beware of the ones who don't answer emails or the telephone. These are good folks.

Mates: On other topics, the subject has come up that the sea climate is especially inimical to ferrous metals: i.e. they rust like a bugger. There are some remedies for this: for one, use brass as much as possible. For another, paint iron heavily. But some iron things were left bright: sword blades and musket barrels most notably. My question is, what did they use for rust prevention besides crew elbow grease? They had whale oil, but that was hellishly expensive and was used mainly for lubricating delicate instruments ike watches. In the Med. they had olive oil, but it gets rancid in the heat. Animal fat gets disgusting, not that they were squeamish. So what were they likely to use? Petroleum products were unknown and I don't know when mineral oil came into use. Beeswax might work, but once again it was expensive. What was the 17th-18th century 3-in-one? What was the pyrate's Break-Free?

Here's the best I can do: go to: www.loyalistarms.freeservers.com click "enter" click "swords and armor" under Naval Swords hit "click here for pictures" my cutlass is the "17th-18th Century Dutch Cutlass."My Webpage

Mate Billy: Ye sound like a real treasure as a shipmate!

I'll share wi' yeone of my most treasured memories: Back in '73-'74 when I was living in Scotland, I haunted antique stores. While my wife looked at furniture, I looked at swords. Every store had a few of them, usually in an umbrella stand. The vast majority were Victorian era ceremonial swords. In one particular store, the swords were laid out on a long table. I hefted a dozen or so of the usual 19th century weapons suitable only for saluting the Queen on the reviewing stand. Then I picked up one that was different. It seemed to be 19th century, but it had the balance of a true fighting sword. It had a rudimentary basket, a slightly curved blade with a crow-quill point section, and the remnants of a sharpened edge. I knew that this had once been a fighting sword. It looked vaguely German or Hungarian, but I can't be sure. Reluctantly I laid it down since I was too broke to think of buying it. Two old Scottish ladies were in the room looking over stuff and they came up to me. One of them said, (imagine a fine Scottish brogue), "Was there something different aboot tha' last swerd?" I said something like, "Yes, these others are ceremonial swords, but this one is a real fighting sword. " She replied, "We thought so. Ye were lookin over these others, then ye picked up that one, and of a sudden ye looked so dangerous!" This remains one of my favorite memories.

Thank'ee, Deacon, I think that's the very quote I was trying to remember. As I recall, there was much grumbling in the papers in those days, not only about the poor swords the soldiers were armed with, but the exceedingly poor training they got with them. This, too may account for the poor performance of the sabers. It takes a swordsman to use a sword properly. Apparently, the Indians considered aggressiveness and a sharp sword more important than formal training. They put the sharpened sword into a wooden scabbard and drew it only to fight. Their saying was "A sharp sword will cut in any hand." Luckily, we have the peaceful leisure to debate these things. It's no longer a matter of life or death for us.

Mate Bloody Jack: Even the sharpest sword won't cut through a scabbard if it be proper made. Note that I emphasized the heavy leather and the brass throat and chape on my new cutlass scabbard. Each brass piece is heavy-guage and about 4" long. Thus held, the edge should never touch, much less cut through, the scabbard. In fact, your big danger in a fall is having the hilt break your pelvis should you land wrong. That's why stuntmen have rubber pistols and swords when they do falls. But, many swordmakers these days supply all-leather scabbards for their swords. These are indeed inadequate, as are wooden scabbards covered with thin leather, if they lack metal throat and chape. Beware of these. The debate of sharp vs. dull is an old one, and it raged during the 19th century. Find if you can a book titled, as I remember, "Arms of the Victorian Soldier." One chapter deals with this very subject. Capt. Nolan of Light Brigade fame was a proponent of sharps, having seen the incredible damage done by razor-edged swords swung by Rajah's troops in India. These were not mystical Asian blades, either, but for the most part English swords cast off as unfit for service, rehilted and sharpened by Indian artisans. As I recall, the debate was purely for cavalry weapons and cutlasses never came into it.

Mate William: Got the gladius from Hank Reinhardt, founder of Museum Replicas, around 17 years ago. It's a Del Tin blade, and may be the prototype they sent Hank when he first decided to put a gladius in the catalog. A couple of years ago I had it rehilted in more authentic fashion by Fred Talley of Texas: cowbone grip and 100-year-old hardwood from Fred's granddad's barn. Just holding it tells you why the Romans conquered half the world and held it for centuries. By the way, the LeMat usually had a 9-round cylinder, plus the shotgun barrel. Fantastic firepower for that era. Concerning personal defense, I'm a lifelong collector and user of edged weaponry and used to be pretty good at hand-to-hand, but I'm not fooling myself. At 56 I'm not going to duke it out with some angel-dusted 20-year-old and my knees are so bad that I can't run either. Thus the little .357: light, portable and hellishly powerful for its bulk. I carry hideaway edged ware, too, but it's not for duelling. I figure a man should learn that you have a knife after you've already used it on him. I recommend the Spyderco Civilian. Love the big Bowies, but they're not very practical for street use these days.

As mate Hawkyns points out, there are now some fine theatrical blades made that are perfect for sword-against-sword demonstrations, without notching up a good blade. I would never use my new one for such a purpose. It's a real weapon, sharpened or unsharpened, and a near miss even in a rehearsed bout could result in a fractured wrist or much worse. On the home defense front, my first choice is my 12 guage, my second is my .45, and my third is my wee little .357 (no kidding, it's no bigger than a snub-nosed .38). The trick is: are these things handy when the bad guys come in through the window? Where I'm sitting right now, none of my firearms are instantly available, but my Roman gladius (I write novels set in ancient Rome) is within arm's reach. It's 19" long and razor-edged and as wide as your hand. Sticking a man with it would be like putting a shovel through him, so, in dire necessity, that's what I'd go for. The cleanup afterward would be a bitch, though. The cutlass wouldn't be a bad choice, either.

I likes me blades sharp. There's few things as vexing as sawing away on some Spaniard's throat without result. If I get into serious reenacting I'll get a dull one, but I just don't feel right with a dull blade. Me old mate Hank Reinhardt has done a good deal of experimentation with blades both sharp, semi-sharp and dull on pig quarters sometimes bare, covered with padding or with padding and mail. It's amazing how much tissue damage can be done with a dull blade that's swung hard enough. Even under padded mail it can actually burst apart wthout the mail being penetrated. Anyways, I likes 'em sharp. If a good pirate's blade gets too notched, he just steals another one. It's not like he plans to pass any family heirlooms on to his heirs.

Just got me new cutlass from Loyalist Arms & Repairs of Canada and I can recommend her without reservation. She's the "17th/18th Century Dutch Cutlass," and while I don't know the true provenance I think she's a fine munition grade generic cutlass for anytime from 1650-1860s. The hilt is a graceful half-basket connected to the pommel-cap. The grip seems to be hardwood. Gaurd and grip are covered with a heavy coat of dull-black paint, an excellent idea for sea service. A magnet test proves that the guard and pommel are steel. Blade is about 26" and slightly curved, with a broad fuller 3/4s its length with a narrow fuller along the top of the broad one. The tip is spear-pointed and the blade has an excellent polish with no tool marks I can see. I estimate it at about 2.5 pounds, hefty for a short sword but this is designed as a skull-splitter, not an instrument for elegant swordplay. Scabbard is made of very heavy leather sewn down the back with brass chape and throat with a stout button for a carrying frog. Best of all is the price, $78.99 US. An astounding price for such quality. In fact, a custom maker would charge more for the scabbard alone. For reenactment purposes, it comes unedged. I'll sharpen mine, but as is it's safe for demonstrations among the civilians and young 'uns, though you might want to round the point a bit. The basket is welded to the knucklebow and the weld is visible on the inside, so I may glue a liner in there to hide it. All in all I couldn't be more pleased and plan to order more stuff from them.

Le Golif's ship was the "Jovial Tiburon," or "Jolly Shark." On the other hand, Captain Pissgums' ship was "The Foaming Crank." Both good, salty names.

And it's the full-dress 1923 Thompson at that, the Hollywood gangster model, not the stripped-down, characterless model the Army had.

A few years ago I found myself in Charleston and found myself touring the USS Yorktown (the 2nd Yorktown, commissioned in '44, the first was sunk at Midway.) That day the QVC network was setting up a show, flogging products off the old girl's flight deck. My jaw dropped when I saw what was written on the side of some of the boxes. I got a picture of a whole stack of crates silhouetted against the ship's island. Written up the sides in big letters was "Mitsubishi." For those unacquainted with the company's history, Mitsubishi built the zero-sen fighter and other aircraft that tried like hell to sink that selfsame aircraft carrier half a century earlier. How times do change.

Right, le Golif's dates seem to be roughly 1660-80, while the French buccaneers were still at Tortuga though the English buccaneers ("the heretics" ) as le Golif calls them, have moved on to Port Royal. He writes of sailing under l'Ollonois and Mansvelt and was, by his own modest confession, the greatest sailor, pirate, swordsman and lover ever seen in those parts. It may be made up, but it's a hoot anyway. Supposedly translated from a 17th century document found during the cleanup of ruins from the bombing of St. Malo during WWII, for what it's worth.

Just scored a new used-bookstore treasure: the elusive "Memoirs of a Buccaneer," by le Golif. Though this "memoir" is of doubtful authenticity it's a rollicking good read and not easy to find. If le Golif never existed in fact, he should have. Highly recommended.

The "Voudon" stuff about Blackbeard originated in the novel "On Stranger Tides," by Tim Powers. It's a work of pure fantasy, though a good one.

I'm now recovering from a horrific bout of flu. This was the GI kind, not the respiratory kind. I lost 10 lbs. This is a weigh-loss program I can't in good conscience recommend to me shipmates.

The worst thing about modern pirates is they talk funny.