Cap'n Pete Straw

crab

I selected educator, but I am really "All of the above." Well, except maybe the anthropology thing. However, you skipped a category that really sums up what I do and who I am: Artist. Reenacting is an art; the research, the artistry of forging historically authentic-looking items out of modern materials, etc. The entertainment (acting) aspect is an art. But it's all educational -- everything I do -- either for the edification and/or experiential enhancement of others... or of myself. But even that is an art.

Pita

Many, and I probably cannot remember half of them... Feedge Fee Starsky (the real name of my best friend in high school was Hutch, ... and it was the 70s; I had no choice) The Hashish Kid Fox Vavoy (that was a secret one with my son: "Daddy" in Klingon) Conejo Tat Daddy Smoochie Guinness Guy The Girl With Glasses Guy Who Also Wears Glasses The one nickname my family (aunts, uncles, etc.) uses is not going to be repeated here, as I am hoping it will eventually go away... Self-selected pseudonyms for reenacting purposes: Enos Dinkle Jefferson Dinkle Isaac Harned Nikolai Metrov Cap'n Pete Straw (but you knew that one...) Actually, I am surprised with how many I remember...

Chicago: 10 inches dumped on us a couple days ago. Bitter, bitter cold -- single digits (born here: used to it). Terrible weather. You probably all heard this on the news -- a plane (737, if I recall correctly) trying to land during the storm at Chicago's Midway airport, hit the runway and could not stop -- shot down and past the runway, through the outer fence, and into a neighborhood intersection. Hit a couple cars and landed atop of one. A six-year-old boy was killed in the accident; the family was on their way to his grandfather's house. A sad, sad story. So, the weather here sucks. Welcome to Chicago in the winter. East Coast beware: It's headed your way.

To be entirely fair (and on topic), here is an 1856 recipe for Haggis: 1 cleaned Sheep or Lamb's Stomach Bag 2 lb. dry Oatmeal 1 pint Stock 1lb chopped Mutton Suet 1lb Lamb's or Deer's Liver Heart and Lights [Lungs] of the Sheep 1 large Onion ½ tsp Cayenne Pepper Salt And Pepper Boil and mince the liver, heart and lights, chop the onion. Toast the oatmeal slowly until it is crisp, then mix all the ingredients (except the stomach bag) together, and add the stock. Fill the bag just over half full, press out the air, add the remaining mixture and sew up securely. Place in a large pot of boiling water, prick the haggis all over with a large needle so it does not burst and boil slowly for 4 to 5 hours.

Sorry! More on the worms! I found this recipe for Mopani (Mopane) worms, and I just had to share it: Mopane worm recipe: Caterpillars are prepared for eating by squeezing out the gut contents before they are fried in their own body fat or boiled in a little water. Most of the caterpillars are dried so that they can be stored for use throughout the year. Dried caterpillars may be eaten dry as a snack or rehydrated and cooked in a little water before they are fried in oil with onion and tomato. They may be served with pap (maize meal porridge), onion and tomato gravy and atchar (chili sauce). Okay, now I must ask you... which would you rather eat? Mopani worms (caterpillars) or Haggis (sheep lungs & oatmeal)? "Neither" is not an option...

Uncle Remus

Played the violin for years, but never (regrettably) kept at it, so I am not much better than when I started. My real learning curve spike occured was when we started my 5 year old daughter on the instrument (Suzuki Method), which meant that I basically had to learn at the same rate as she did. Since the Method says you only do not need to practice for an hour on days that you do not eat, I was keeping up with her for a couple years as she improved. However, the Pupil became the Master. I stopped practicing, and never allowed her to stop. Now 16, she has utterly mastered the instrument, and is utterly fantastic at it. Plays First Chair in orchestra. Is a member of a garage band. Plays country/bluegrass fiddle like no-one's business. Gave her a (incredibly expensive!) electric violin for Christmas last year. Me? I am back where I began again. I know how to play, but am not very good at it. My own violin sits under a thin layer of dust in my daughter's closet. But I play the Jaw Harp ! Which makes me an asset when the country/bluegrass instruments come out! I have acquired a set of the Harps in various keys, and never ever chip my teeth (that's the real trick, folks!).

Okay... not addressing Christine's question... Favorite smells (these are not colognes): - Egg nog - Banana anything - This smell: Prepare Rice-A-Roni according to package instructions. Add two tablespoons of butter to skillet over low heat, then pour in the rice/vermicelli mix. Stir to evenly coat rice, making sure the heat is not too high (avoid scorching the butter!)... wait for it... wait for it... when it is cooking well, and while stirring often to keep it from burning, lower your face as close as possible over the skillet and inhale deeply. That smell. That cannot be equaled nor surpassed by any scent imaginable. As far as cologne is concerned... - The musky cologne or odor (as yet unidentified by me) that some women wear, which was the same thing worn by the lesbian girlfriend of my own high school girlfriend (this is a terribly, terribly long story). When I get a whiff of it (usually in crowds -- who is wearing that?), it takes me back... so far back...

Okay, that is the coolest thing ever. Just thinking how rad that would look on my own lawn. Oh... sorry... I meant "cool," not "rad."

Forking.

Back on the topic, I have only ever had GREAT Haggis. Having found it on our first day in Edinburgh, I ordered the same thing every available meal at the same restaurant. It was delicious, so I never looked in another restaurant.... probably a good thing, as I therefore have never had bad Haggis. ... but, then, I eat bugs, so what would I know from bad Haggis?

There is little I have not dared to eat. When a group of us were in St. Petersburg (Russia, not Florida), the rest lost weight because they found the food unpalatable (we were staying in an old tuberculosis hospital, which was originally stables for a Czar, but now was a health sanitarium). Mmm, Russian hospital food. And I have eaten insects (gourmet insects!). But - and here's where I am getting - a restaurant in South Africa had "bush food" on the menu. Not realizing at the time that this was a non-P.C. food (involving hunting, cooking and serving animals deemed by the rest of the world as endangered), I ordered "Mopani Worms." These are caterpillars, about the size of your thumb, served in a bowl of hot chili sauce... (...Have I already posted this in another topic thread?) Anyway, here, for your viewing pleasure, is a Mopani worm: Looks tasty, eh?

Spoon-fed

The "Puffy" (Pirate) shirt from International Male (see separate topic under "Plunder") A pistol/cutlass kit from Dixie Gunworks. "Captain Blood" on DVD. "Pirates of the Barbary Coast" and "...Revolution" cards. ...and then some non-pyratical DVDs and CDs not particularly mentioning here.

Hah! Found it! These are a riot, and I recommend you access this link, then pick out your favorite listed opponent and read/watch (some are comics, some animated cartoons... MOST funny, some stupid.) Mr. T vs. Everything Enjoy.

There are a number of very very funny webpages all devoted to Mr. T versus... everyone. You name it, and Mr. T faced it. Fought it. Then pitied it. Hang on a second, and I will find the link and post it...

I think I am the funniest guy ever when I am drunk. Re-read that carefully and interpret it appropriately.

Ahh, ye see, it be too small for me nine-inch "pirate."

I ran into a guy who wearing the infamous "puffy" shirt as featured on the Seinfeld TV series. He was really surprised that I wanted to know where he got it, as exactly ZERO men ask him where he got the shirt. Anyway, it is available from International Male, and is called the Ultimate Poets Shirt-- priced at $69.99. Makes a great pirate shirt (which was the running gag of that TV episode), but purests beware: it is a historically non-authentic acetate/rayon blend. Incidentally, if you purchase the newest Seinfeld boxed DVD set, it comes with a miniature puffy shirt. It would only fit an eight-inch-tall pirate, however. Also on the International Male website is the Swashbuckler Shirt -- a steal at $44.99. Anyone looking for last-minute Chrsitmas ideas for me, now you know where to look....

While in Malta, I got myself a Maltese Cross tattooed on my hindquarters. On Saturday, November 5, 2005, I was deeply, deeply moved while visiting the Neolithic temple complexes of Hagar Qim and Mnajdra. I connected somehow to an ancient (5,000 year old) Zeitgeist, and something happened deep within my soul, which I cannot put into words. (Was I one of the Knights in a past life? Or possibly a priest of 5,000 years ago?) Later that afternoon, over a Steak and Ale Pie and two pints of Guinness, I felt I had to connect myself with this island in some permanent way. But none of this was planned. "Accidentally" wandering past a tattoo parlor (which was somewhat out of my way and which I already knew was there from my previous visit to Malta), I wandered in, suddenly thinking to myself "Wouldn't it be awesome to get a Maltese Cross tat while actually in Malta?" I had 45 minutes of unobligated free time remaining to myself before I would have to plunge into a solid week of exhausting non-stop work. The artist said it would take ten minutes. I got the store's hours, thanked him, and walked out. Half a block later, I realized that if not now, then it would never happen, and I owed this to myself. I believe he was surprised to see me walk back in. He wanted to be more artsy, using open lines and shading; I wanted it full black with no modern fanciness -- straightforward and raw. I got what I wanted. Best 20 Maltese Lira I ever spent. The four arms of the Maltese cross are said to symbolize the four Cardinal Virtues which the Knights of Malta (actually, the Knights Hospitallers of the Order of St. John of Jerusalem) ascribed to follow: Prudence, Temperance, Justice and Fortitude. Various meanings are offered for the eight points of the cross (including the eight nationalities from which the Knights originated), but my personal tattoo represents the popular defifnition of the eight points, which is the Knights' eight obligations (loosly based on Christ's eight Beatitudes): To live in truth. To have faith. To be sincere. To give proof of humility. To love justice. To be merciful. To endure persecution. To repent of sin.

Haggis is on my list of Best Foods Ever. Spent a week in Scotland (this is regaled somewhere else in this Pyracy Pub) and was fortunate to try haggis on the first day in Edinburgh. ... cuz that meant I had it every other day, too. Awesome stuff. The FDA here in the States has outlawed consumption of lungs as a food product. Which means no real haggis on this side of the pond. I have a link to a haggis website that rates a dozen or so haggis recipes which are all supposed to be delicious, but they are ranked by the percent of items that you would find in real authentic haggis. So recipe #1 is (if I recall correctly) only missing the lungs. The very bottom item on the list is an all vegetarian "haggis", which I believe only shares the ingredient oatmeal with the real thing.

One fight when I was a kid with one of the neighborhood bullies who kept picking on me. One day, I got fed up and jumped him (he was twice my size) and beat the living snot out of him. Bloodied his nose and broke his glasses (yes, he wore glasses, folks, and I hit him... but I remind you: he was a bully!). It turned out that he used his height to intimidate others, but he couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag. I ended up feeling really sorry for him and -- perhaps this is ironic considering how he treated me -- I still feel sorry for him to this day. The only other fight that comes to mind (I voted "2 fistfights") was in a college theatre class over a disagreement -- I was goofing off and accidentally crushed some guy's cigarette while he was smoking it (it was in the classroom, and he was being a dick... but whatever). He was wicked pissed because that had been his only cigarette, and he started hitting me. I was primarily blocking his punches, trying to end the fight -- we were actually evenly matched, as I countered everything he threw, but it took a third person (the teacher) to break up the fight. We settled down, and while we were preparing to shake hands over the whole thing, Mister Dick threw a sucker punch right to my face. Sported a black eye for a week. Him I do not feel sorry for. I hope he got a lot more cigarettes and smoked them all. And then found out what the Surgeon General was warning everyone about.

Macaroni and Cheese