William Brand

Please take the box and hide it from me.

Spoken like a true cook. If you lived any closer I'd invite you to Baconfest 14.

Well... ...cook it longer.

"Oui. I came to inquire after the rescued women before I retire. I trust they are improved...if only a little since coming aboard?" The answer was simple and affirmative. "Oui, Capitaine." "Good. Good. And how are things with you?"

No, no, no. You're a pirate. You don't apologize. I think you meant to say..."Vile Bacon! Meat was meant to be ground, like my enemies underfoot! Sausage! Sausage or death!" Better, no?

That's up to you...heretic. lol.

"What's he that wishes so?" Then William went to the sea chest which served for his own belongings and took from there his copy of Le Morte d'Arthur and added it to the borrowed books. "These were lent to me by a departed friend and so the value of them is great. Mind you that no harm comes to the Bard or Malory." "Aye, Captain...and thank you." William dismissed him to his rest. Then taking up his hat and coat he went to the surgeon's quarters to inquire after those so recently rescued. Passages of Henry the V were still echoing about in his head as he knocked.

Pure. Evil. I could freebase that stuff.

Well...they were a secret until you posted.

Sigh. I'm hungry.

Pure evil...

I was recently involved in a discussion with a fellow pirate that spanned many subjects, when we suddenly turned to the sacred subject of Bacon. That holy and blessed meat of divine, savory goodness. The capstone in the pyramid of food groups. The crown jewel in the vault of salt meats. The ultimate additive. The sanctified condiment. A supernatural food wrought from the garbage of man by that most humble hog...which magically transmutes, transfigures and transports the cast off remnants and table scraps of our kitchen into a delicacy as precious to our waiting pallets as chocolate. You can imagine my surprise when I discovered that this friend, with whom I have had discourse for several years, was in fact a bacon despiser! Not a penitent and humble partitioner of a faith which denies the fruit of the pig, but an actual free agent of denial. An individual free to choose Bacon, but denying the blessings thereof. A living, breathing omnivore as capable in reasoning as any self aware mammal I have ever met, choosing to live in a world filled with bacon...but eating none of it. Words fail. I find myself at a crossroads. For many years now I have served as the host and master of ceremonies at an annual event so singular in purpose that my very connection to this Bacon unbeliever jeopardizes the tenets of my faith in food and my standing among my Bacon worshipping friends. For thirteen glorious years we have gathered to celebrate that most blessed barnyard animal...the pig. I'm shaken. I had no idea that revilers of Bacon existed in the world. How will I sleep at night? I suppose my only solace will be found in the extra portions of that savory and vital victual. Of course...I'm kidding. I know some people don't like Bacon or choose not to eat Bacon. It is just a matter of taste or religion. Which begs the question... ...Who likes Bacon?

We're discussing carpolling and camping at length under "camping in the fort". A great many people are driving down, so it is very likely that you could get a ride if you chip in on gas money and ask politely. I believe that Hawkyns and Captain Bo are driving.

"We tread too heavily in countries that have known other grandfathers than ours." William said, taking up the copy of Shakespeare he had set aside upon Dorian's arrival. "The common curse of mankind, - folly and ignorance". He said, quoting Troilus and Cressida as he slid the small volume across the table to Mister Flint. "You might read to Nathan, if you like."

'It's not that chocolates are a substitute for love. Love is a substitute for chocolate. Chocolate is, let's face it, far more reliable than a man' - Miranda Ingram 'Forget love...I'd rather fall in chocolate!' - Anonymous 'There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with CHOCOLATE' - Linda Grayson 'Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands and then eat just one of the pieces' - Judith Viorst 'There are four basic food groups, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, white chocolate, and chocolate truffles' - Author unknown 'Chocolate is a perfect food, as wholesome as it is delicious, a beneficent restorer of exhausted power...it is the best friend of those engaged in literary pursuits.' - Baron Justus von Liebig, German chemist (1803-1873) 'What use are cartridges in battle? I always carry chocolate instead.' - George Bernard Shaw 'Never mind about 1066 William the Conqueror, 1087 William the Second. Such things are not going to affect one?s life...but 1932 the Mars Bar and 1936 Maltesers and 1937 the Kit Kat - these dates are milestones in history and should be seared into the memory of every child in the country.' - Roald Dahl 'The divine drink, which builds up resistance and fights fatigue. A cup of this precious drink (cocoa) permits a man to walk for a whole day without food.' - Montezuma - Aztec Emperor (c. 1480-1520) 'This guy found a bottle on the ocean, and he opened it and out popped a genie, and he gave him three wishes. The guy wished for a million dollars, and poof! There was a million dollars. Then he wished for a convertible, and poof! There was a convertible. And then, he wished he could be irresistible to all women... poof! He turned into a box of chocolates.' - Anonymous 'Nine out of ten people like chocolate. The tenth person always lies...' - John Q. Tullius

William nodded at this last part, having had some news from the New England Colonies concerning the Abenakis and the French. The northern most colonies were in a constant state of confusion as the super powers played out their games with many native peoples and colonists as pawns. There was but sparse information on the wars up North, but privateers and navies brought samplings of the conflicts Southward to the Caribbean. Rumors of war regarding one Benjamin Church and his attacks along Acadian coasts had reached as far South as La Desirade before the Watch Dog had left there. No doubt Beaubassin was the principal objective of those forces. It was a strategic place of trade and power and conflicts had been known there before. The first attack on the Acadians of Beaubassin in 1696 had nearly coincided with William's own misfortunes. "We go to gain a little patch of ground That hath in it no profit but the name."* William refreshed Bill's drink. *From Shakespeare's Hamlet

One of my all time favorite films. Glory. I can't believe you got Fandango. Next quote... "You sure have a way with people." "Well, they're my species!"

I horde chocolate.

July 18, 1704 - The Ward Room of the Watch Dog First Bell of the First Watch "Your opinion of Mister McCormick is so noted, Mister Flint, and your candor in the matter is greatly appreciated. I will consider on the matter and make a decision." Then William fetched the bottle that he had shared before with the other officers. He placed two small glasses upon the Ward Room table. He poured the heady liquid into the cups with steady hands, compensating for their progress across the polished surface as the shifting tide around La Blanquilla rocked the Watch Dog. Mister Flint stopped his glass before it could drift too far from center, and William did the same. Then the Captain took up his drink, but having no appropriate toast for the occasion, he simply sipped, one hand behind his back. Bill sipped his drink as well. Then William sat down again and turned the conversation to a subject he almost never discussed. "What news from England, Mister Flint?"

"Aye, Mister Flint." William said, looking up from his own personal logbook. He gestured to a chair opposite him at the table, then he went back to scribbling while Mister Flint took a seat. Miss Smith placed a cup of tea in front of Mister Flint and then she retired from the room. What followed was a long silence as William continued to write. A great many events had transpired in the last few days and William had been unable to record them all. Now they were spilling off the quill as fast as he could write them down and he meant to excise them all before any details were lost. Deaths, rescues, farewells, and revelations all found their way to the page as Mister Flint was made to wait in the quiet room. Finally he set the quill aside, shook a sander full of pounce over the newly penned pages and blew off the remainder. "Mister Flint..." he began, setting the book aside, "...I have several matters to discuss with you about your time aboard this ship. Let me begin by expressing my appreciation to you for accepting the many responsibilities required of you since you came aboard. Your efforts in the armory have not gone unnoticed." "Jus' doin' my duty, Cap'n." William nodded and a second brief silence followed. "Mister Flint...it cannot have escaped your notice, having come so recently from a frigate of the Royal Navy, that the Watch Dog is undermanned. Therefore, your arrival has come as a blessing laced with unexpected blights. Gaultier, for all of his poisons both literal and symbolic, was an enemy whose purpose was written for all to see. There could be no question about that man. The man in the cable tier is an altogether different matter. He is imprisoned for actions which cannot be ignored..." William paused and smiled a moment. "...though, taken against the rest of the crimes the crew has brought aboard, his trespasses seem somewhat small. Give me your opinion of the man, Mister Flint. Can the man be pursuaded to join us or no?"

I am well, thank you.

A very good point. As the time draws closer we can contact the vendors to make sure that the small items we might bring as giveaways will not conflict with their sales. We don't want to keep any vendors away. Pirate vendors are necessary to satisfy our addictions.

July 18, 1704 - Aboard the Watch Dog Just after four bells of the Second Watch They spoke at length on many subjects great and small and two bells came and went while they discussed the matters of McCormick, fortifications and the Ilex treasure they hoped to discover the following day. Miss Smith had long ago cleared the crockery from the ward room table when Mister Lasseter's prompting brought them full circle to Flint and Jonas. William dismissed the Quartermaster and Master-at-Arms to their respective duties and waited for the able seaman to arrive.

"Aye Mister Pew. Flint's word on the matter is paramount, but as the Master-at-Arms you may be required to arm Jonas at a later time and so I must require a vote of confidence from you as well. Still, you are right to wait for word from Mister Flint, for as I said, you may both reserve your final opinion on the matter until after we have words from him. He may contradict all our suppositions made here." Then, in an effort to avoid any more theories or speculations, William shifted to another topic. "Tell us, Mister Pew. How is Mister Franklin taking to his new responsibilities?

"You are a man of short sermons, Mister Lasseter. A right, popular parson you would have made." William said with a smile as he too sampled one of the many delicacies that Mister Gage was conjuring of late. The recently discovered castaway cook whom they had fished from the sea was proving to be a fine fisherman. He patrolled the deck of his galley as the Quartermaster and Captain patrolled the quarterdeck. The galley was quickly becoming an entity unto itself. It was ever issuing forth the heady smells of fish yet unnamed and impossible culinary miracles for a ship so small. More than that, it was a turn of good fortune, for they were all showing the signs of good health in an age and occupation of hazardous consequences. And even more than this, it was agreed by all to be 'damn fine stuff'.