GlueBeard

Eh?? Wot's that?? Yer back? Now, that's all fine and well, I s'pose, but where's me rum?? Man the mizzenmast! Shiver me timber!! The Rum Locker's under seige. ARRRRRRR!!

Shiver me mantimber, he said rum! Arrrrrrr!!!

Me pirate band on the Isle of GlueBeard continues to learn new tunes. There be plenty 'O room fer one and all, what be interested in a game or three, now and again. Aye. The newest game be "Ice World," and we also recently added "Smack the Penguin. Be sure to drop in and shout ahoy, if'n ye be sailing in the waters near me isle. ARRRR!!

More details, eh?? ::Scratches glue-covered head:: There be round 'bouts a hundred arcade games to choose from, and now and again, we be havin' a contest 'O sorts, what to sort out the wheat from the chaff, if'n ye be knowin' whut I means. ARRRR!!

Salem Bob, First, I haven't went on about anything at great length, yet. I certainly wouldn't characterize my prior posting as being "at great length." Your choice of words is most curious. "General fashion" is, in and of itself, inherently vague and open to question. During the 40 years of my lifetime, I have witnessed enormous variety in general fashion. Fashion varies dramatically from individual to individual. Many factors impact and influence one's choice of fashion. This has always been the case with mankind, where fashion is concerned. Even today, and especially where hand-sewn garments are concerned, variety is the rule, rather than the exception. With regards to "trying to be authentic," there is a notable distinction between "trying to be authentic" and "being authentic." Certainly, they are not one and the same. One can try, to their heart's desire, to be authentic, but I fail to see how a hyper-selective pick-and-choose approach to authenticity yields an actual authentic product. Selective authenticity, where one takes what one wants and leaves what they do not want to trouble themself with, leaves a lot to be desired, if the objective is to achieve authenticity. Problematic in discerning from paintings and cartoons the totality of fashion for a given time frame is that, whether in yesteryear or even today, artists often utilize their respective mediums to showcase their own creativity, rather than be slaves to historical accuracy. I do not summarily dismiss historical examples of fashion that do exist. However, most garments wore by most people were never studied, much less preserved nor documented. Garments are crafted for a great many different reasons. The result is a plethorea of clothing that is simply worn and used, and not in the least way preserved for posterity's study and emulation. Some of the more unique hand-sewn garments that I have seen made during my lifetime have little, if anything, in common with what you might term "today's fashion." In any given time frame, there have been a multitude of fashions. Period. This is simply a fact of everyday life and everyday reality. In consideration of the sheer number of peoples, nations, and cultures, not to mention the intermingling thereof, this is far from surprising. If anything is disingenuous, it is to imply that our knowledge of prior ages garment and fashion choices and options is anywhere near complete and authoritative. It isn't. I haven't looked down my nose at anyone. However, there is nothing which dictates nor demands that I accept ignorance as the truth, no matter what garment one chooses to dress it in. It is well worth noting and highlighting that pirates were not exactly the most static and isolated of individuals. They often ranged far and wide in their activities. They encountered and interacted with, albeit admittedly often on very violent terms, thousands upon tens of thousands of individuals from multiple nations and from a host of cultures. The supposed "visual representations" that you provide, in the hypothetical form, all lack the element of being convincing. It is not simply what is visually displayed, but how it is displayed, and the perceived authenticity that accompanies the same. Just as the clothing do not make the man, neither does the clothing nor gear necessarily produce a convincing replica of a pirate. Especially since many would lack a foundational base of historical knowledge to begin with, even the holy grail of authenticity can come across as unconvincing, or even as an imposter, depending upon many things, not just upon the garments or auxilliary items, themselves. Donning a crown, even a real crown, does not necessarily convince the world that one is a king. Do you really think, therefore, that one makes a convincing pirate, simply because they are adorned in "authentic" gear? I certainly don't. Your concession that the visual examples you provided are not perfect is so noted. Why, then, should what even you, yourself, admit to be imperfect examples be necessarily persuasive, then, much less conclusive to complete strangers who attend a given show, demonstration, or performance and encounter them? Objects, alone, make poor educators, and often times, they make poor educational tools. If they do, then we can get rid of all teachers, and just put books in our schools. Anyone who has ever sat through a boring class in high school can certainly attest to the fact that how history is presented, far and away more than historical data itself, is what is both persuasive and educational. Your attempt to label my prior posting as possessing of hostility is error made manifest. We live in what has been termed an "oft disputatious society." We are a rather opinionated lot. But, to suggest hostility on my part, evidenced through my opinions authored in this forum, lacks truth in totality. A very notable Supreme Court Justice once said that a free man must be a reasoning man, and he must dare to doubt what a legislative or electoral majority may most passionately assert. Likewise, that very same free man must be prepared to take issue with what people, both as individuals and at large, put forth for mental consumption. There is nothing, whatsoever, in any of my posts that denote a lack of tolerance on my part for others being possessing of their opinions. That I post my opinions in no way, shape, nor form deprives nor denies similar expression to others. I am not obligated, however, by ignorance-based-fiat, to accept as truth that which I full well know is not true. Hyper-selective-authenticity is not the same thing as authenticity. Period. If authenticity is to be the touchstone whereby the matter is to be resolved and decided, then so be it, but let it not be some watered-down, dilluted version of authenticity. A battle between replicas of pirate ships is a battle between replicas, not a battle between pirate ships. Yet, the replica can, and often does, persuade assembled masses that they are as close to the real and genuine article as one can get in today's day and age. But, we full well know that such really isn't the case. I hardly find "close but no cigar" to be particularly convincing argument, where authenticity is concerned. You're either fully authentic, or you are engaged in pretense, at best. I don't seek to deny you your pursuit of pretense, but likewise, I have no vested interest in buying-in to half-truths, partial-accuracies, or over-weighted depictions of authenticity. The most convincing examples of pirates of the 17th century, for example, that I am aware of in today's day and age are real and genuine pirates. Many of them wear blue jeans and sport M-16's or other modern-day weaponry. You could adorn yourself like a peacock in any attire of your choice from any period of your choice, and end up looking like anything but a pirate. If Daffy Duck dons cowboy boots and jumps atop a horse, he doesn't necessarily convince people that he is a cowboy at all, much less a particular cowboy or a cowboy from a particular era. To me, whether faire or re-enactment, I am faced with one set of imposters or another set of imposters. After all, whether entertainer galore or authentinazi incarnate, it's still just role playing, in my book. How can it properly be labeled otherwise? So, the melodrama, smoke, and mirrors of your verbal arguments aside, I find myself exactly where I was before I entered this discussion. Fully of the mindset that the primary nexus of piratical brotherhood lies in an firm, deep, and abiding appreciation for freedom, and not an over-reliance nor rigid-adherence to rules fabricated by supposed authorities on piracy and pirates. I seriously doubt that the sum totality of all of what the piratical authentinazis of today know about piracy would impress Blackbeard in the very least. Every single adherent to the entertainer school of thought, whether they realize it or not, are de facto beneficiaries of Blackbeard. How? Because Blackbeard, and other pirates like him, understood that the single most important ingredient to being convincing as a pirate was not what they wore nor which sidearms they armed themselves with, but with engaging the imagination of their audience and victims. Blackbeard knew that what really mattered was that they believed that he was a pirate. And that is only something that can be achieved within the audience. Even at the risk of galling some, particularly those who have cast their lot upon the Sea of Authenticity, I would dare say that entertainers share a quint-essential dynamic of authenticity with pirates that really can't be disputed. Pirates were entertainers of the first magnitude. They entertained their victims, their fellow piratical brethren, and themselves. Blackbeard is infamous, not just because he was a pirate, but because he was a pirate that held great affinity and regard for drama. To him, drama, something which modern-day piratical entertainers share, was no less important and no less vital a tool of piracy than a cutlass or a ship were. Wearing certain clothes or sporting a certain sidearm did not make Blackbeard a pirate, and they certainly didn't make him infamous among the ranks of his historical piratical brethren. Drama, however, did. Unlike replicas of clothing or sidearms or ships, though, drama can be as genuine and real for pirate entertainers today as with their piratical ancestor, Blackbeard. All hail Blackbeard!

GlueBeard's Isle do be congratulatin' Commodore Eomer on his win of the "Thar she blows! contest, the first in a series of arcade game contests on the Isle of GlueBeard. Arrrr!!

Confound their blasted hides! Me isle done be gettin' invaded by aliens from outer space. Arrrr... I be uh extendin' this bodacious invitational to all 'O ye, wot can bring the scruvy dawgs down. Aye. Just head on o'er to me island, and join the fun. The Isle of GlueBeard

Aye, Zorg. Aye. Many thanks. I be on the lookout fer both ye and LadyBarbossa. We still be makin' some improvements, and gettin' the isle shipshape. The "Me Hearties" list now displays individual avatars for pirates docked at me isle, and the parrot messages are functioning. Even a cannon shot or three has been heard in days of recent vintage there on me isle. Aye. Any of the lot 'O ye should feel free to put in at port and dock anytime. Aye.

Aye, Ahoy. What am I driving at? Well, for the sake of clarification, allow me to expound a bit, if I may. Authenticity is not an alter upon which to worship, nor is it an axis around which either reality or history rotate. The fact of the matter is, where garb is concerned, for instance, pirate exist as much today as ever, and pirates - real, genuine pirates - do wear blue jeans or tennis shoes. They wear whatever the Hell they want to, if for no other reason than because they want to. Blackbeard, which is as good of an example of a historical pirate as any, may have been guilty of many things, but of ignoring reality to focus upon the monster of subjectivity known as "authenticity" was assuredly not one of them. Whose version of authenticity is in question? Yours? Mine? Ours? That Joe down the street? If one wishes to go back several hundred years, many clothes and shoes, for example, were hand-made. Are the needles that are used to sew modern replicas of supposed "authentic" articles of supposed "pirate" clothing? For all of the ado made about stitch count, how many of the authenti-nazis utilize needles or other tools that are hundreds of years old to create their garments? Perhaps we should all carry a loom about in our pockets. Or, have a woman as chattel to serve as our seamstress. As articles of clothing, for example, were hand-made, in many if not most instances, common sense dictates that the look of individual items of clothing varied enormously. This has been the case throughout recorded history. People are people. Human beings are human beings. Blackbeard was an authentic pirate, not because of what he wore, but because of who he was. But, he was a melodramatic son-of-a-bitch, wasn't he? He always putting on a good show, even if, at times, that very same show was a deadly one. Pirates were, and are, creatures of convenience. Many became or stayed pirates because they viewed it to be a much easier life aboard ship than going the non-piratical route. History more than amply demonstrates that dead men's boots were often stolen, and this was true where both pirates and non-pirates are concerned. The Wild West, for example. Why? Because, those stolen boots might make walking more comfortable and more convenient. Furthermore, human beings throughout history have always had a penchant for embellishing their garments. Pirates neither invented nor perfected this aspect of authenticity. It has happened throughout recorded history, and continues to this very day. Fashions can and do change, but it is no less equally true that it was quite fashionable among pirates to be their own person. How many pirates have their been down through recorded history? I would speculate in the thousands. Yet, they would be clones of one another, when it came to garment and apparel, even within a given timeframe? Not at all. Life aboard historical pirate ships did not afford a great deal of room for individual pirates to be possessing of extensive wardrobes. I would day say that many had only the clothing on their backs at any given point in time. I doubt that they stopped off at the local Wal-Mart to pick up some new threads while sailing upon the high seas. When opportunity afforded itself, pirates seized clothing from others, if they wanted it. They enslaved people and took their lives on a whim, at times. Yet, they didn't just take what the other person was wearing? Of course they did. A fancy hat, a shiny bauble, a colorful piece of clothing, all would help to distinguish them, as well as to serve as a mean for replacing worn out and tattered articles of clothing. I would agree, certainly, that a pirate of the 1720's would not be found wearing a pair of Nike tennis shoes. But, if any line of argument proceeds upon the waves of shallowness and weakness, it would be the one. It didn't happen, for it couldn't have happened. However, you don't live in the 1720's. Nike tennis shoes are available as a choice to cloth oneself in, where footwear is concerned. Could a 1720's pirate have arrived at a faire or festival in a 1995 Toyota pick-up truck? Or a 1977 Trans-Am?Or any other type of modern-day method of transportation? If the questions of supposed "authenticity," where articles of clothing are concerned, is of paramount importance to replicating a pirate, then why didn't these piratical figures, themselves, care about uniformity of dress? Because they would have regarded such as contrary and antithetical to both the reality that they lived in and to the rules of common sense. Historical pirates could understand how slippery a deck of a ship could become. Could they not relate to a modern-day individual wearing shoes or boots that afforded them greater gripping power, where a modern ship's deck is concerned? Yet, if someone dares to place safety as a higher priority than the illusion known as "authenticity," they somehow become relegated to the realm of being less of a pirate than to someone who chooses to dress, otherwise? It should be duly noted that I am not "up in arms" about anything. Any suggestion to the contrary is a slight of verbal hand, at best. I can understand and appreciate why no one wants to volunteer to be hanged by the neck until dead. Yet, that is a reality that many pirates were faced with every day of their "career." It is also a risk and a reality faced by pirates in today's world. How quaint an approach it is to pander to the gods of detail over thread count, but to give such short shrift to the greatest elements of piratical reality and authenticity. My, but how some strain at a gnat and swallow a camel. It would be true that some aspects of nautical life could be conveyed without necessity to resort to hanging people. However, by the same token, how is it that one dressed in garb of their choice are any less the able to demonstrate the same? If a person can tie a knot, they can do so no matter what shoes they wear. An individual who can load and fire a cannon can do so in the nude, or while wearing ballet slippers. I don't have a problem, per se, with Hawkyns. If I have any difference of opinion with Hawkyns of note, it would be with regards to his disenchantment with children, where his attempts to live the pirate life is concerned. Attention to detail can and does serve people well in many aspects of life. But, there is a time and a place for all things, and attention to detail is not the definitive measure of either men or pirates. Pirates being pirates, pirates had many sides and many facets to their lives. That is part and parcel of being human beings. They had comraderie and enmity simultaneously with their Brethern of the Coast and with their fellow man in general. But, if there is any aspect of pirates which is authentic, it is that pirates, by their very nature and their choice of profession, tended to come across as very colorful characters. Perhaps deadly, perhaps thieving, perhaps lots of things, but colorful, nonetheless. And not because they wore a bright red velvet or neon jacket or didn't. Their colorfulness, as characters, was not dervived from their clothing, though clothing could, at times, become symbolic of that colorfulness as characters. But, when you trace the colorfulness to its source of origin, one discovers that it is traceable to the fact that pirates were human beings, and that they held no monpoly on being colrful characters. The reality, when all is said and done and all threads have been counted and all footwear has been checked and re-checked, is that what distinguished men and women as pirates was based upon a matter of simple choice or of circumstances. If circumstances preclude one in today's reality from having their own ship, or of having their stitch count perfectly in order, then, as with pirates of all days and ages, circumstances can be a cruel master. Circumstances are often beyond one's control, as much as the waves of the sea were often beyond the control of any sailor or pirate. The other item is choice. A pirate possessed choice, in many instances, if not in becoming a pirate, then in remaining one. That choice manifested itself in many ways. Sometimes, circumstances prevailed. At other times, choice prevailed. Those are legacies that we all, each and every last one of us, share in commonality with our piratical brethern of yesteryear. Whether Faire or re-enactment, if one must excuse themself and head off either to the woods or to the port-a-potty to have a moment with Mother Nature, are they less of a pirate because they opted for toilet paper over their fingers or tree leaves? Would Black Bart pick paper or stench, if he had the choice? Would Blackbeard be less of a pirate if he chose to squeeze the Charmin? On a given day, a man is a coward. On another day, he is brave. One one day, man is right. On another day, he is wrong. But, throughout it all, he is what he is. Being a pirate, therefore, is, I believe, greater than the sum of the individual parts. Individual aspects can lend insight, but even that is limited by the manner in which those aspects are both presented and received. I did not coin the phrase "authentication nazi." It, like other colorful phraseology, is merely a label, to be worn or discarded at will. However, I do wonder what Blackbeard's reaction would be, if it were suggested to him that he was less of a pirate because his stitch count was inaccurate? Pirates of history did not deny to themselves partaking of the pleasures and conveniences of the day and the reality that they lived in, if it was readily at hand. History can be useful, and even pirates were aware of this. To fail to learn from history dooms one to be more vulnerable to repeating its mistakes, both on grand and lesser scales. However, pirates of historical note, if anything, were not slaves to history, for to be such is still to be bound in the iron yoke of slavery. History, if anything, would likely teach us that it is not a wise practice to judge a book by its cover. Yet, with such sharply in the forefront of our minds, where, then, I woudl ask, lies the wisdom in judging a pirate by their clothing of choice? Is that how pirates judge their shipmates? based upon what shirt or shoes they wear? Or, are pirates possessing of such internal fabric that they are able, willing, and corageous enough to rise above such petty trivialities? I, for one, whatever I may be call or not called, am not so foolish as to be unable to discern that the sea and nature are as vicious and as real and as unforgiving as ever. The hardships are always there, but if they are staged hardships, then the experience, of necessity, must be, at a bare minimum, somewhat dilluted. I can, indeed, understand and appreciate someone taking pride in their work. Hence, I can appreciate why some view it to be deserving of their time to indulge themselves in their garments and baubles. Yet, I shake my head at instances wherein garments and finery of any sort become more important than comraderie. If you can master the sea and the waves and the storms, then you command my respect, regardless of what you wear. If you demonstrate knowledge that I do not possess, then that will command my respect, regardless of what you choose wear. If, however, you are either hung up on yourself or your knowledge, or if you believe yourself to somehow be more "authentic" than your fellow man, woman, or child, then such is deserving of nothing short of both contempt and mockery. Whatever else may be said and conceded about pirates, it is incontestable that they were, first and foremost, people. If a pirate is to be judged on anything, where authenticity is concerned, then upon what fraud is it posited that that a pirate be a pirate based upon that which is external to them, rather than that which be internal to them? In Hawkyns instance, he would appear to be a man possessing of considerable knowledge. Knowledge is, by its very nature, an internal thing. But, application of knowledge is quite the distinct creature from knowledge, itself. The greatest truth, in the hands of a fool, may still be the truth, but its message may be muted in deference to the banter of a fool. I would be remiss at this point, I believe, if I did not state quite openly and honestly my belief that I do not discern that Hawkyns dislikes children, per se. But, I do simultaneously and likewise believe that Hawkyns would be well-served to reconsider his present disposition towards children at events such as re-enactments. My own experience has been that children are far more receptive to learning than adults, and what a shame it would be to be possessing of knowledge that is not passed on to those who could appreciate it far more than any adult ever could. At the point that any search for knowledge is taken to the extreme, piratical or otherwise, it becomes vanity, and by extension, foolishness.

I be uh performin' an upgrade yesterday, and it wanted tuh give me the old what fer, but I be makin' it walk the plank, and has it all squared away. We also added to me Isle a large number of additional games, all of which the high score be recorded fer. If'n ye be likin' games, particularly the arcade type, then chart a course fer me isle today. If'n I counted right, there presently be 97 games that the high score be recorded fer. Soon, we be startin' Pirate Wars, too, a contest 'O sorts. Afore long, we'll also be startin' some team competitions, soooOOooo make haste and put into port on the Isle of GlueBeard. Aye. ye'll be glad ye did. Arrr....

B L O O D Y . . . . . H E L L ! ! Methinks that old Will be right when he says, "Much ado 'bout nothing." Pretendin' tuh be a pirate don't make ye a pirate nary a more than pretendin' tuh be authentic somehow talismanically imbues one with authenticity. The scope of human history is such that people be people, and human beings be human beings. Pirates wore what they could steal or find or buy or make. Period. Circumstances based in pure, unadulterated authenticity did not always afford them the luxury of stopping to count threads or to regard with disdain what their fellow mates wore on any given or overrated occasion. Pirates were individuals. They always were. They still are. They varied widely in diversity, appearance, and garb. To suggest or intimate otherwise is nonsense. The modern day media is full of inaccuracies. Do ye think that what media there was in days of old be the Gospel? Books and other works, whatever they may hold, do not hold a monopoly on the range of human experience and expression, and certainly not where pirates and piracy are concerned. A pirate be a pirate, no matter what garb he or she wears. Aye. An actor or an imposter be just, exactly, no matter what they wear, nor when it was made, nor how it was crafted. Rules, rules, rules. Mark me word, but they'll be the downfall of men, yet. Aye. Much ado 'bout nothing. And what is the gain? More confusion than 'ere nary a word wuz said. The more things change, the more they be uh remainin' the same. If the books and the "histories" that were written be so accurate and definitive, then why are the vast majority of pirates unknown to us, even now? And, wot be this strange affinity fer rules? Rules be antithetical to the life of a pirate. Yet, paradoxically, at least some pirates had rules they chose to live by. But, not all did, and not all shared the same rules. There always be exceptions. Some pirate always be makin' sure of it. Aye. If those who worship authenticiy disfavor drama by the meledramatic frollickin' type, then blame that scurvy dawg we most affectionately be callin' Blackbeard. The whole bloomin' sea wuz his stage. He nary missed an opportunity one to entertain his guests and audience. Aye. If authenticity be the order of the day, then volunteer to endure a genuine, AUTHENTIC hanging. Pirates were strung up by their necks, were they not? Or, meself, I be likin' tuh watch the authenticiy of a good old-fashioned and historically accurate keelhaulin'. No mere reenactment can ever capture the authenticity of the genuine article. If ye sell yer soul to any society, then ye forego that which every pirate loves the most - their freedom. If one be slave to authenticity, then ye be a slave. Let yer yea be yea and yer nay, nay. But, then again, wuz Captain Crunch a pirate? Well, wots wit the ways some of ye be uh dressin yerself these days, it makes me wonder. If the good Captain be uh readin' this thread, I s'pect that he probably would conclude that it is just plain too much work tuh be a pirate. I be takin' sides wit the young ones on any occasion, though. Aye, they be bastards, fer sure, many times. But, that be the makins of a fine pirate, if'n ye be askin' me. Pirates didn't what they were tuh satisfy any high-falootin' society of self-appointed historical aristocrats. They didn't shun the towns and the villages, their audience, simply because brats be runnin' underfoot. Aye, that be whut children do. It be their function every bit as much as whut a pirate do be their function. Pirates, try though they may have, and they were miserably successful at failin', did not endure the hardships of their lives simply because they wanted to see if they could do it. The hardships, rather, accompanied the lives that each of them chose, or in some cases, were chosen for them. Any history can be made boring or not worth the bother, if ya has an asshole fer an instructor. Aye. If ye be wantin' tuh experience the life of a pirate, go and forcibly board a Coast Guard Cutter. Aye, ye be livin' the excitin' life, fer sure. No more firewood duty, fer sure. If anyone durst be uh wantin', nay, be uh cravin' to pit themselves and their wiles against nature and the sea, well, they still be there uh waitin' on ye. They be as real as ever. Ye don't have a ship? An authentic pirate would steal one. That, of course, carries with it the baggage known as "risk." A sword fight wit real swords carries risk that a foam rubber sword does not. However, ifn't ye not be trying to genuinely kill the bastard on the other end of yer blade, then why bother pullin' yer sword at all? Wot be authentic 'bout a half-hearted effort? Wot bizarre alchemy has transformed pirates into such a noble type? Pirates thrived on convenience. Go into the woods and gather firewood, or steal it from the local convenience store that sells it? Now, wot would a real pirate do? From where I be sittin', which is glued to me chair, I see little difference in one set of actors compared to another set of actors. Fer, when ye get right down tuh the gist 'O the matter, if it look like a duck, and walk like a duck, and quack like a duck, then whatever it may be, it not be a pirate. Rather, it be one all taken up wit affinity fer actin', and tryin' tuh convinced not just others, but themselves, that they somehow be more authentic or closer tuh bein' a pirate than the other ducks about them. Now, whether feathers be ruffled or no, me point be this. If ye not be a pirate in yer heart, then ye be not a pirate at all. Pirates live and pirates die, but the essence and spirit of what it is to be a pirate lives on, and shares commonality with men, women, and children of all times and ages. Mankind, through bits and pieces and down through history, has romanticized the life of pirates, just as we romanticize many things. But, that be what men do, just like children do whut children do. Terrorists of today are, in essence, not pirate so much as they just be a bunch of assholes. To truly terrorize requires the expertise of children. How, then, can anyone entertain the thought that children be out of place at any event at which there be those professin' brotherhood with pirates? One should never grow so old that they no longer believe that they can learn something from a child. At times, a child be the only one ye can trust. Who be yer real mates then, I asks ye, one and all? Aye. Fer all of our pretense and claims, fer all of our studying this and that, fer all of amassing of educated ignorance, when all be said and done, not a one 'O use can ever even hope to compete with children, when it comes tuh decidin' where the real spirit of piracy do abide. This be a strange ship the lot 'O ye be uh sailin' on. Fer sure, fer certain. Ye buys one another drinks, rather than just drink. Ye debate the merits of this aspect of piracy versus that aspect of the same. But, 'tis all fer naught, if'n yer ultimately loses yer sight of the essence of it all. Pirates flew more than one set 'O colors. They often flew them 'neath false pretenses. They lied. They misled. They deceived. They be a treacherous lot, they be, Aye. Real, authentic bastards. 'Course, that's cuz they be human, just like you or I, or that lad o'er there who done be fell asleep and need a good kick in the chin. I not be aware that it was forbidden for any who truly desired to become pirates. The path was open to any who be darin', willin', or foolish 'nough to choose it. And as the sayin' be uh goin', the Gates of Hell be wide. Best, then, tuh steer the sea wit yerself at the helm, if'n ye are unable tuh cast yer lot wit those that ye trust yer fate and yer fortune with. Aye. Now. . . . .Where's me rum?!

Aye, LadyBarbosa. Aye. We be uh thankin' ye fer yer complimentaries, we do. Ye be joinin' us fer the festivities when ye is able. That suits us, it do. Be sure tuh watch fer sharks on the way in. They be lurkin' in the waters nearby. Aye, the scurvy rascals do.

Aye, BarbadosJack. Aye. Thank ye kindly fer the bottle 'O rum, Hellava. Fer sure, fer sure, the rum be flowin' on me isle. Plenty fer one. Plenty fer all. 'Cept we don't be chargin' fer it there. Aye. We be pirates, so we stoles it in the first place. Har har har!! The Quartermaster put up a fresh poll this mornin', and am flyin' it in the breeze. I say it be time fer pirates tuh decide the age old question of, "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" Ye and yer mates are welcome anytime, BarbadosJack. I still be tryin' tuh get a few huts built, but a few ships be makin' port call there on a regular basis now. Aye. We even has a few wenches in the lot 'O 'em, but I warn ye aforehand, lads. They be holdin' their own in the arcade. Aye. They would as soon fire a broadside at ye as tuh look at ye, if'n ye ask me.

I be uh invitin' the likes of all of ye to me island, whenever and if ever ye be takin' a notion tuh chart a course fer those distant waters. There not be much yet, in the way 'O forums, but if'n any 'O ye be the gamin' type, then aye, ye might take a shot at some 'O the cutthroats 'O the arcade there. Some 'O the pirates there already be uh gettin' the big head, such that their covers no longer be uh fittin' 'em. Aye. Ye be findin' me island at: The Isle of GlueBeard Ye needs be registered, though, fer yer scores in the Gunner's Daughter Arcade to record yer scores, but if'n ye don't be seekin' no fame or infamy, then ye can still play the games without registerin'. Tell no tales that ye has not received no invitation. Now.......Where's me rum?!

I be a pirate o­n the sea I be a pirate, livin' free Gold by the tons and maybe more That's what this pirate's fightin' for Pirates, Pirates Everywhere Pirates, Pirates Where's me share? Show me the loot And let me go I am a pirate Yo ho ho! Roamin' the waves as I cross the sea Livin' the life that's meant for me I fight and I drink and I plunder, too I be a pirate through and through Pirates, Pirates Everywhere Pirates, Pirates Where's me share? Show me the loot And let me go I am a pirate Yo ho ho! Up in the Crow's Nest, that be me Lookin' as fer as me eyes can see Seein' a ship, and she's loaded down Now she's me prey and o­n her I'll pound Pirates, Pirates Everywhere Pirates, Pirates Where's me share? Show me the loot And let me go I am a pirate Yo ho ho! You can fight or surrender, I don't care All that I want is me own damned share Call me a pirate, sneer at me name I'm gonna do it just the same Pirates, Pirates Everywhere Pirates, Pirates Where's me share? Show me the loot And let me go I am a pirate Yo ho ho! Sailing the Seven Seas o­n high Upon the waves is where I'll die I am the the o­ne that all have feared Sailing a ship with old GlueBeard Pirates, Pirates Everywhere Pirates, Pirates Where's me share? Show me the loot And let me go I am a pirate Yo ho ho!