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Greybeard?


Red Maria

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Could this be it?

A Pirate Christmas

Twas the Night before Christmas,

When all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring,

Not even a mouse.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The Children were nestled, all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar plums danced in their heads.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter!

I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Drew open the curtain and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow

Gave the lustre of midday to objects below.

When what to my wondering eyes did I view,

But a minature ship, with a Pirate crew.

With a little old sailor, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this wasn't Saint Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he growled, and shouted, and called them by name:

"Now Redbeard! Now One-eye! Now Drewry and Jack!

On Hook! On Smoke! And you, Little Mac!

To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall,

Now Blast Away! Blast Away! Blast Away all!"

As dry leaves that before the winter hurricane soar,

When they met with an obstacle, how the cannon did roar... (This was followed by the ship firing into the side of the house, smoke and everything :) )

So into the house, the coursers they sail,

With the ship full of toys, and two barrels of ale.

And then in the distance, I heard in the hall,

Their laughter and cheers, and that silly little song.

As I drew in my hand and was turning around,

From ship to the floor they came with a bound.

As I watched the cookies for Santa disappear,

Deep in my heart grew the oncoming fear.

For seeing the Pirates and what they've done in the past,

I knew that this Christmas would be different from last.

They spoke not a word, but went straight to their work.

And began filling the stockings, so I said with a jerk:

"But why? What are you doing this for?"

He replied "Arrrh, it's Christmas! Besides, it's loot from the neighbors next door."

They unloaded the ship and sat around the tree,

And began drinking their ale, and even left some for me.

Once their task was all done and their break complete

They headed to ship for they had other places to meet.

They sprang to the ship, to the crew gave a cheer!

And I knew that these guys were our Santa this year.

And I heard them exclaim, 'ere they sailed out of site,

"Merry Christmas to All!

And to all a Good Night!"

Poem written by Jeff Ballentine, Jonathon Hastings, Bryan Morrow.

~Black Hearted Pearl

The optimist expects the wind. The pessimist complains about the wind. The realist adjusts the sails.

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There are several "corsair carols" in the Pirate Songbook published by No Quarter Given, including one called "A Pirate's Night Before Christmas." Other parodies include "Pirate Ships Are Coming to Town" and "Have a Jolly Roger Christmas." I don't have it handy, so I can't provide any more details than that.

Melusine de la Mer

"Well behaved women rarely make history." - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

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