Caraccioli Posted June 13, 2007 Posted June 13, 2007 In today's email, I found the following 3 spam messages in this order (I couldn't make this stuff up, I swear): From: Alberta Wooten...Subject: Longer...Harder From: Joan Hall..............Subject: repugnant From: Shields N.Basil.....Subject: paradoxical Further down in the list was this one (too bad it wasn't fourth): From: climactic...............Subject: of course he has exhibited at the Museum of Modern Art in New York and Guggenheim... "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?"
Red-Handed Jill Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 Today I got: "Out a convicted you that only Fall the Galactic centers, of the regent." Ummm....
The Doctor Posted June 14, 2007 Posted June 14, 2007 I'm fairly certain that unless one is trying to break into the Thai porn industry, there's no need for penis AND breast enlargement pills. Just a thought. Yo ho ho! Or does nobody actually say that?
Gigi Posted June 15, 2007 Posted June 15, 2007 My favorite spam subject line so far has been "Bendy Boner Blues". At least they had the alliteration down.
Caraccioli Posted June 15, 2007 Posted June 15, 2007 Today I got:"Out a convicted you that only Fall the Galactic centers, of the regent." Ummm.... It's poetry, see? Possibly the beginning of a great epic sci-fi novel, grand in scope and scale, the movie adaptation of which may star John Travolta. "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?"
PyratePhil Posted June 17, 2007 Posted June 17, 2007 ...and here I thought I was becoming popular with Zen poetry masters... ...Qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum... ~ Vegetius
Caraccioli Posted June 17, 2007 Posted June 17, 2007 A banner spam weekend for my email! These are in order, once again. This set makes me feel like I'm eavesdropping on three women having a conversation in a deli... (What could they be talking about?) From: Eve N.Maynard........Better left for evenings. From: Peggy......................There are always exceptions. From: Gertrude Albert.......describe [the?] furthest And then, naturally, the email conversation of SPAM topics turns inevitably towards sex and religion (maybe that's what they were talking about?) From: Sales...........................Make your thing bigger in view [a few?] simple steps From: Sylvester X.Freeman....finite From: potbellied....................conceptual agnostic From: Freeman......................occurrence monk "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?"
Red-Handed Jill Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 You'll love this one... "flabbergast gedanken thrombosis"
Iron Bess Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 You'll love this one..."flabbergast gedanken thrombosis" Well, you may not realize it but your looking at the remains of what was once a very handsome woman!
Caraccioli Posted June 19, 2007 Posted June 19, 2007 Gedanken? Gedanken... "`Gedanken' is a German word for `thought'. A thought experiment is one you carry out in your head." So far, I like gedanken! "In physics, the term `gedanken experiment' is used to refer to an experiment that is impractical to carry out, but useful to consider because it can be reasoned about theoretically. (A classic gedanken experiment of relativity theory involves thinking about a man in an elevator accelerating through space.) Gedanken experiments are very useful in physics, but must be used with care. It's too easy to idealize away some important aspect of the real world in constructing the `apparatus'." This is how I have any understanding at all of Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle. "Among hackers, accordingly, the word has a pejorative connotation. It is typically used of a project, especially one in artificial intelligence research, that is written up in grand detail (typically as a Ph.D. thesis) without ever being implemented to any great extent. Such a project is usually perpetrated by people who aren't very good hackers or find programming distasteful or are just in a hurry. A `gedanken thesis' is usually marked by an obvious lack of intuition about what is programmable and what is not, and about what does and does not constitute a clear specification of an algorithm." [source of quote: http://www.jargon.net/jargonfile/g/gedanken.html ] Gedanken! "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?"
Red-Handed Jill Posted July 2, 2007 Posted July 2, 2007 Got this one this morning - it seemed apropos... "Pillage decided"
PyratePhil Posted July 2, 2007 Posted July 2, 2007 cosmopolis Aesculapius wanhsien murrhine menuhin swordcraft ...I must admit - "swordcraft" caught my eye... ...Qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum... ~ Vegetius
Caraccioli Posted July 3, 2007 Posted July 3, 2007 Yeah, that's what they're hoping...some random word will get'cha. "You're supposed to be dead!" "Am I not?"
Misson Posted July 6, 2007 Posted July 6, 2007 Oh, now this one is clever! I might even have clicked on it had they not made a couple of key mistakes I know to watch out for. From: "vintagepostcards" <bhsjv@peoplepc.com>Subject: You've received a postcard from a Family member! Date: Fri, 6 Jul 2007 00:15:07 -0700 Hi. Family member has sent you a postcard. See your card as often as you wish during the next 15 days. SEEING YOUR CARD If your email software creates links to Web pages, click on your card's direct www address below while you are connected to the Internet: http://125... (a whole bunch of numbers I will not glorify by reposting them) ...95523 Or copy and paste it into your browser's "Location" box (where Internet addresses go). PRIVACY vintagepostcards honors your privacy. Our home page and Card Pick Up have links to our Privacy Policy. TERMS OF USE By accessing your card you agree we have no liability. If you don't know the person sending the card or don't wish to see the card, please disregard this Announcement. We hope you enjoy your awesome card. Wishing you the best, Administrator The first thing I saw that raised my hackles was "Family member has sent you a postcard." Bad grammer. Often a sign of SPAM. Second was the term "Family member" itself. I have learned never to trust something that isn't addressed to you by name and, in this case, from an individual by name. The third was that the email address is a peoplepc.com addy. Most firms doing stuff like this would have xxxx@vintagecards.com or some such. The fourth was that the addres was a long (very long) string of numbers with no short cut URL name. Taken alone, that's not quite enough to completely dismiss it, but it's suspicious. I would have expected www.vintagecardios.com/card=xxyyzz or some such. Still...pretty clever. High marks to them for this one. "Okay, alright, important safety tip, thanks Egon." "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
Red-Handed Jill Posted July 6, 2007 Posted July 6, 2007 I've been getting those A LOT lately. "Cards" from family members, mates, friends, etc.
Misson Posted July 7, 2007 Posted July 7, 2007 Huh. That's the first one I've seen. "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
Misson Posted July 19, 2007 Posted July 19, 2007 Ah, two more phishing eCards. One from "Neighbor" and one from "Class Mate." I like that they capitalized them so that they look sort of like formal names. Got one this morning that I just liked the sender's name: From: Johnathon Yazzie Subject: It may strengthen your relationship with your partner. I wonder if he means my cat? Eww...I looked at the message. I hope he doesn't mean my cat! The cat would be awfully put out. (Like right out the screen window.) Johnathon Yazzie...hey William Red Wake! I think I know what I want to name my doctor character for PiP! "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
PyratePhil Posted July 19, 2007 Posted July 19, 2007 I seem to have more Family members the last few months than I thought possible - the permutations boggle the mind. Almost makes me long for the days when my good friends, the widows of the late African-nation Presidents, wanted to send me money. ...Qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum... ~ Vegetius
Red-Handed Jill Posted July 19, 2007 Posted July 19, 2007 Yes, but the mails are sometimes so amusing... Here's an example of one I got today (the subject was "Still rocky feeling"): The Grandmother was in an impatient, irritable frame of stormy mind. bag Without doubt rat the brush roulette had turned "But, mother--" "I expected doubtfully nothing at all from him," driven she reflect replied--quietly enough, to all outward potato seeming, yet with "Oh blonde dear no!--though I arm knew all became example the time that you were lying there." "And twist now you'll have shod a million roubles, at damage least--goodness stunk gracious me!" exclaimed the clerk, rubbin "Oh, my dear rescue sir, I esteem and understand doubtfully your kindness in always putting the question. stride No; at present I ha Mrs. hurt Epanchin was milk in the form habit of holding drop herself very straight, and staring before her, without spe "Your philosophy forgot is rather like that of an insurance old woman we know, who condition is rich and yet does envious nothing but t poorly "Oh, there I can give you grew my type stole fullest assurance that she did NOT. I was there all the while--she had "If it's zoom all settled, Gania, then of course Mr. Ptitsin land is right," said double Nina cow Alexandrovna. "Don't fr challenge "Certainly not; what are you thinking of? arrive What could have induced cook you harsh to ask such a question?" she r "I never, never thought chosen understand you were like that," said ticket Muishkin, drawing a deep vanish breath. "I thought you--y "Let's play at purpose some spray cooing game!" insect suggested the actress. "I was strict, but trust just by statement bird nature. At that time we were stationed in a burst small town. I was quartered a Prince S-- made the acquaintance of program market ship organization the general's family, and Adelaida, the second girl, made a grea shine So use at sort the risk of missing General Epanchin altogether, and thus postponing his watch visit to Pavlofsk for "Just as wriggle though you didn't know! Why, she ran away from me, and frame went to you. perfect You worried admitted it yoursel "You wish to exchange crosses? light Very well, Parfen, if brake that's snatch the case, I'm glad mowed enough--that makes us spill "As wrung into soon as we reach crush home give it to me to read." growth "I spread knew it, but I have a right. dull I... I ... shaggy "stammered the "son of Pavlicheff." Hippolyte raised linen his head wring boiling face with an effort, saying: note infamous A minute afterwards, Evgenie Pavlovitch fit reappeared on shave the terrace, in great agitation. strike The subject under discussion grain did not appear to shock be helpful very popular with the assembly, and some would hav Alexandra, who war had seemed cause to wish to put in her word when the prince began, dance now slippery sat silent, as thoug
Misson Posted July 20, 2007 Posted July 20, 2007 Why, it's the long lost sequel to Jabberwocky! Either that or the galley for the next Harlequin romance. "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
Misson Posted August 28, 2007 Posted August 28, 2007 Ooh, a good one from Amazon. The email address threw me (although it shouldn't have. They obviously would have my email address if they sent me the email. ) "Hello USERNAME@SOMEMAILSERVER.com, Greetings from Amazon Payments. Your bank has contacted us regarding some attempts of charges from your credit card via the Amazon system. We have reasons to believe that you changed your registration information or that someone else has unauthorized access to your Amazon account Due to recent activity, including possible unauthorized listings placed on your account, we will require a second confirmation of your identity with us in order to allow us to investigate this matter further. Your account is not suspended, but if in 48 hours after you receive this message your account is not confirmed we reserve the right to suspend your Amazon registration. If you received this notice and you are not the authorized account holder, please be aware that it is in violation of Amazon policy to represent oneself as another Amazon user. Such action may also be in violation of local, national, and/or international law. Amazon is committed to assist law enforcement with any inquires related to attempts to misappropriate personal information with the intent to commit fraud or theft. Information will be provided at the request of law enforcement agencies to ensure that perpetrators are prosecuted to the full extent of the law. To confirm your identity with us click here: [link edited out] After responding to the message, we ask that you allow at least 72 hours for the case to be investigated. Emailing us before that time will result in delays. We apologize in advance for any inconvenience this may cause you and we would like to thank you for your cooperation as we review this matter. Thank you for your interest in selling at Amazon.com. Amazon.com Customer Service http://www.amazon.com This message and any files or documents attached may contain classified information. It is intended only for the individual or entity named and others authorized to receive it. If you are not the intended recipient or authorized to receive it, you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution or taking any action in reliance on the contents of this information is strictly prohibited and may be unlawful. If you have received this communication in error, please notify us immediately then delete it from your system. Please also note that transmission cannot be guaranteed to be secure or error-free. "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
Misson Posted April 27, 2008 Posted April 27, 2008 Got this one today: From: Cottrell - Subject: Get a large penis scar free And I'm thinking, 'As opposed to what? Paying for one?" Or are the youths today into some new fad that I hadn't heard about? "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.” -Oscar Wilde "If we all worked on the assumption that what is accepted is really true, there would be little hope of advance." -Orville Wright
William Brand Posted April 27, 2008 Posted April 27, 2008 Aye. One of those few SPAM emails in dire need of punctuation.
Mission Posted October 20, 2008 Author Posted October 20, 2008 Some things never change. Got this in my email today [link removed]: "n A Spy-device that lets you watch trough the clothes. ky7" And, from Popular Science, 1965: (Notice that both have typos in them...although you might be able to argue about "An hilarious..." It is my understand that "an" is primarily used in front of a word beginning with 'h' only when the 'h' is silent or the speaker is snobby. ("An historical" seems to be one of the exceptions, although it is proper either way from what I understand.)) Mycroft: "My brother has the brain of a scientist or a philosopher, yet he elects to be a detective. What might we deduce about his heart?" John: "I don't know." Mycroft: "Neither do I. But initially he wanted to be a pirate."
Lady Cassandra Seahawke Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 careful about opening anything even the original email let alone any attachments. There is now a program that can be downloaded to computers that will circumvent any of the anti-spyware programs. Once it is downloaded you will not be able to tell it is even there it will note you keylogging and transmit any information that seems like bank or personal data. The company I work for sent me to a seminar about computer security and the guy was an expert on the subject. The best bet is that if you subject it is spam "don't open it and delete it completely from your system immediately" There are some spyware programs that will attached even if you don't open it but allow it remain on the computer for x amount of time. Really freaky what some people can/will do to get someone's personal information. Lady Cassandra Seahawke Captain of SIREN'S RESURRECTION, Her fleet JAGUAR'S SPIRIT, ROARING LION , SEA WITCH AND RED VIXEN For she, her captains and their crews are.... ...Amazon by Blood... ...... Warrior by Nature...... ............Pirate by Trade............ If'n ye hear ta Trill ye sure to know tat yer end be near...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now