Endless Mts. Ren Faire

[PyratePhil]

I be off wit' me two cabin-boys to the Endless Mts. (PA) Ren Faire today.

Iffin' ye be good little lads an' lassies, I might even be purr-sueded ta post a review and maybe a photy-graph or two later.

It be a tiny faire (30 vendors), it be their first time, but they got's a few talented players, so we'll be seein' what we be seein'...

[Kalum]

Ya haveta lemme know how it goes! Hopefully it'll be goin' well as it's a "local" event for me. Currently I'm stuck in the balmy waters of Florida until I get can meself back up to the northern waters of PA.

[PyratePhil]

Review on First Day of Endless Mtns. Ren. Faire

Please keep in mind a few things here – this was the first day of the first attempt of this Faire – a true newbie endeavor on this production company’s part – so of course there are some things to be, shall we say, overlooked. Also, consider the source – me. I’ve been to only two other Ren Faires – one in New York (3x), one in PA (6x) – so am hardly a seasoned observer. I only write what I see and feel.

That being said…

The grounds, the County Fairgrounds in Dallas, PA, are perfectly suited to a faire such as this. Hidden away in a wooded setting (although any trace of foliage is totally eliminated from the grounds themselves, hence no shade or back support!). Plentiful free parking, with a good-looking band of Pyrates ushering you in at the entrance road (Huzzah!).

Admission - $10 adult, $5 child, under 5 is free. Normal prices; actually, cheap.

No offer of a program upon entrance – I’ll get into the program in a second.

I believe there were 6 staff members working the faire in costume, along with strolling members of several performance troops, so you had roughly a dozen costumed people “belonging” to the Shire. Not many, considering…first complaint – have more staff, mainly for improv and visitor interactions. Hire some high school or college kids to dress up, give ‘em a few things to do, make some ATMOSPHERE.

Another point, but probably only a local issue – visitors – PLEASE make an attempt to dress up for the occasion, even if only a large shirt worn on the outside of your jeans with a belt thrown over it. TRY to become part of the experience. Get into it. It’s supposed to be FUN, not a “stare and glare” contest. The best participants were the younger (teen – mid 20’s) crowd – they really “got into” some of the role-plays I “volunteered” myself for. For those who came fully “dressed” – thank you! You made the Faire, and your attention to detail was not ignored by this author.

Bathrooms – a biggie – nothing but Porta-Johns. C’mon, folks – break down and get a real bathroom with sinks and towels and mirrors – kind of hard for a Pyrate as vain as me to check my “look” in a Port-a-Potty…this is a fairgrounds – every year, they have a large County fair – what’s the story?

Vendors – about 30 vendors, as advertised – the craftspeople were well set-up, costumed, friendly, and accommodating. Future vendors - c'mon - there's doubloons to be made here - join up! Food vendors – well, with the exception of turkey legs, no “period” food – just burgers and sundaes. Food lines moved slowly, pricing was about what was expected.

Events – a Celtic music group, Empty Hats, was extremely entertaining and musically accomplished. The same cannot be said for a “belly dancer” and accompanying drummer. Missed Giacomo the Jester (might see him tomorrow or Monday). The Pyrate Reprise – went to this with high hopes – nicely costumed players, good start to the skit, but seriously petered out after only 10 minutes. HIGHLY anticlimactic. Spoke with The Pyrate King afterwards (a wonderful, gracious, and knowledgeable gentleman, BTW) – you, sir, should use your theater background to guide the other players in building excitement and satisfaction. 10-minute skit? Boo…

Although events such as these were scheduled and started on time, FINDING a schedule was a bit more difficult. True, they were posted in several locations, but would it hurt to hand out a schedule at the ticket booth?

Things to Do Sorry, but you all fell far short here. NO games, for kids or adults. NO strolling minstrels, except for the fiddler from Empty Hats. NO magicians, fooles, storytellers…what were we supposed to DO here?!? Eat, buy things, watch a show, and leave? Oh, for shame…I mentioned this to the Tarot card reader, who vowed to mention it to the production company. Even something as simple as a Jacob’s Ladder, or a Drench-A-Wench… which brings me to…

PyratePhil’s Famous Wrate-A-Wench – wherein you learn the most important measuring criteria of a Faire – the number and quality of wenches in attendance. We give a rating from 1 to 5 Bodices…a 1-Bodice rating means that the only wenches strolling about were your Mom and your 6th grade Social Studies teacher, Miss Schwaggerman, who just turned 78 last week… a 5-Bodice rating – well, let’s put it this way, with all due respect to the ladies on this board – gentlemen, this be hog heaven! You’ll be cross-eyed and sweatin' for weeks afterward.

And the first rating for this first Faire is…(drum roll)….

2 Bodices!

Granted, there’s always room for improvement. Perhaps a greater number of players on staff (see above) would help up your rating. But it’s hard to get excited when 97% of the wenches you spy are got up in jeans and sweatshirts. Ladies – when attending a Ren Faire – skirts are required. Something long and flouncy, preferably (OK, personal preferences are intruding here…). There are always exceptions, of course – the breathtaking maiden who took the photo of me and my cabin boys, and to whom I paid the sincere compliment later in the day – you, m’lady, single-handedly brought the rating up from a 1 to a 2 – congratulations! :>)

Ladies – as far as the freshness of the male stock – well, all modesty aside, with the exception of yours truly, who cannot be included in the judging due to his insanely masculine aura and finely-chiseled musculature – I would say, on a scale of 1-5 Codpieces, this Faire ran at about 3 Codpieces – plenty of skin and hair showing, no Bermuda shorts with brown penny-loafers and white socks, lots of manly men walking around with kilts (on a windy day, yet!) … Eye–candy galore, ladies!

The Joust – a well-done joust was held 3 times during the day – the same players as at the Mt. Hope PA Ren Faire – well done to all, say I, and huzzah, Lucas!!!

Well, that be about it…I was heartened to see the fairly large ratio of Pyrate characters about, a good time was had by my cabin-boys and me, and we’d certainly go back again next year. In fact, since I’ll probably be bored tomorrow and Monday, I might go again to see what I shall see…

[Rumba Rue]

All the Ren-faires out here in Calif. have Port-a-potties. No getting away from that. Even though the Escondido Faire does have an area with real flushing toilets, the Portas are always brought in to handle the crowds.

Sigh....

Well it sounds like that faire may infact be "Endless" in it's perspective to the general public.

Rumba Rue

**When arrggghh just isn't enough**

[PyratePhil]

Rumba Rue-

But arrr we talkin' small faires, o' the biggie ones? Although, I guess it be a mite diffycult to be runnin' plummin' and such inta th' forests...

An' here I be thinkin' Callyfornia be first in everything!

[PyratePhil]

Day 2

Had me some fun today...me two cabin-boys were off'n ta the Great Port O' New York, so's I went ta th' faire stag. (And NO, I don't be meanin' I had horns on...)

The performin' troop came 'n' asked iffn' I'd be willin' to participate in some o' their skits - they heard about me fightin' background somehow ( ) - so's we went at it hot and heavy several tymes fer the payin' folks.

Oh, what a rush! The applause! The autty-graphs! The kisses! The congradiations! The kisses! Um, I said that...

I be a happy, happy pyrate today, lads and lassies - gimme' a sword and a stout pair o' boots, and I'll gladly be swingin' fer me supper!

One interestin' thing...durin' one o' me bouts, I seems ta have lost me copper mug and me nice little red suede flogger. Thinkin' they was 3 sheets ta th' wind, I swallowed me pride and marched in the final procession...lo and behold, a lass comes up, points me to a vendor booth, where some kindly soul turned in me mug. After bestowin' bows and kisses ta the responsible parties, I proceeded with the procession....only ta be stopped again by a different female type, who pointed me yonder to the person holdin' me flogger - they said it seemed the right thing ta be doin'...

What a lot o' nice folk! Jes fer that, I'll be returnin' their little ones in the mornin'...

[Captain Goodwench]

Phil, me luv, you must post the picture you taken!!! I'd love to see you in yer getup! And you've gotta teach me some o' yer fightin' moves!

My own moves are pretty effective, though they're more, um..subtle, yeah, that's the word for them! You could teach me how to manipulate a sword, maybe the 'touch o' death'

You oughtta come up here for the Ontario Renfest, it's the only one I've ever been to, and gets better every year. It runs on weekends throughout July and August, I love the performer 'Zoltan the Adequate' he does tricks and stuff. And the guys that do a funny skit in a mud pit, hilarious!!!

I'm putting my costume together as we speak. I haven't decided on the style of bodice yet. I'd really like a black leather one, like the gypsy girl in the recent 'Van Helsing' movie. Very hot!!

[PyratePhil]

Phil, me luv, you must post the picture you taken!!! I'd love to see you in yer getup! And you've gotta teach me some o' yer fightin' moves!

My own moves are pretty effective, though they're more, um..subtle, yeah, that's the word for them! You could teach me how to manipulate a sword, maybe the 'touch o' death'

You oughtta come up here for the Ontario Renfest, it's the only one I've ever been to, and gets better every year. It runs on weekends throughout July and August, I love the performer 'Zoltan the Adequate' he does tricks and stuff. And the guys that do a funny skit in a mud pit, hilarious!!!

I'm putting my costume together as we speak. I haven't decided on the style of bodice yet. I'd really like a black leather one, like the gypsy girl in the recent 'Van Helsing' movie. Very hot!!

Soon's as I gets me pikchures deeveloped, m'lady, I'll be a-postin' 'em hereabouts. It jes' be a throw-away magic pikchure box, tho, so's I cant's vow as to the quality (although if I be in the pickchure, it be high art!).

Aye, I'd be mor'n willin' ta be teachin' ye the finer points o' weapon manipulations...

M'lady, you get that black leather bodice together, an' I'll be wingin' me way up to Ontario Port, no mistake!

[PyratePhil]

3rd Day Report

RAIN!!!

Arrrrrrrrrr.....

A soggy pyrate be I right about now, lads an' lasses...even me parrot was a'drippin from'n his pore lit'le tail...

Me pouches were soakin', me sword was a'rustin...even me little flogger was drenched...

Two fights in the grass and I called it a day - it wouldn't be proper ta be a'swingin' at yer adversary and slippin' down ta yer keel.

Well, on the bright side o' things - it could be said I got me Drench-A-Wench wish!

<sigh>...NorEast PA in Spring 'n' Summer...nuthin' like it...

[Katherine "Kat" Adams]

Phil...

I was at Endless Mt. on Sunday... sorry I missed you.

I hope you don't mind my adding a bit about what I observed, maybe from a bit of a different perspective.

First... as a first year faire, it was, in my lowly opinion a "good" faire with enormous potential.

I was to a second year medieval festival last weekend as a vendor, and lost my britches, so as a vendor, let me say that those brave souls deserve my hats off. I did check into it to be a vendor, however all the things that I do, with exception of my hat creations, was well covered therefore I did not persue it further. My hats are not the big money for me at faires and therefore it is not worth the investment for me to pay the vendor fees and motel bills not to mention the gas prices at this time.

As for porta johns... well most of the faires that I've been to only have porta johns or very few "real" bathrooms.

Locals in garb.... well that takes time... I did get into a confrontation with a "local" over the validity of pirates at the festival..... I tend to take it a bit personal when someone bashes pirates.

The shows.... remember it was a first year festival... it takes time. Personally I think a group of Pirates..... should get together and invade!!! and show them what pirates can do. LOL

Personally I think this one has a real chance of making it!!!!!!!!!!

There were some problems but I guess after last weekend .... this one was a gem.

I will go back next year........

Just my lowly opinion......

again... sorry I missed ya....

yours aye

Kat

[PyratePhil]

Aye, I be soory I missed ye too, Miss Kat! Iffn' ye saw a strange feller what was walkin' about with a parrot on his shoulder - that be me

Ye might also have seen me iffn ye caught the afternoon "Pirate Reprise" show at the Steel Rose stage...I were the "bad pyrate" what got beat up by th' Deputy.

And aye, I don't mean to disparage th' Faire - it takes a brass monkey ta pull off a fest like this. In fact, I just received email from th' Pyrate King, that there's a better'n even chance that the Faire will be 3 weekends next year (and yers' truly has been invited to join the cast...ahem).

Re: Porta-Long Johns - I guess I jes be a spoilt Pyrate!

Vendors - aye, they DO need ta be makin' a wee bit of an investment, and their sales Monday, due ta the rain, must'a been horrendous. But many sed they'd be back, so huzzah!

Don't mind the locals, missy - they jes be needin' some "edoocatin'"

[Katherine "Kat" Adams]

Phil...

I cannot believe that we were that close and didn't get to meet. **sigh**

I stood and watched the Pirate Reprise.... Congrats on the invite back!!!

I'd love to be able to be a participant at one of the faires. So did ya happen to see the pirate Cap'n running about with black and red skirts and a red corset and a black tricorn with peacock feathers? I was with me ma so I was on me best behavior. Ok.. except when I was giving Sir Eric a rough time.

As for the "locals" I usually consider the source... I do like to get back in their faces on occassion. LOL

I'm glad to hear that things are looking up for next year for them. I really think that there is alot of potential for that faire.

Hmmmmmmmmmm... may need to check later to see what ones are not coming back... mayhaps there be a hope for me after all. Although I don't know I'm really starting to think maybe the way to go is to can the vendor thing and just try to get a job there. I be attempting to get a job at Pa Ren at the end of the month. At least maybe I can make enough to pay for my gas.

Again I'm sorry I missed ye.

Yours aye

Kat

[PyratePhil]

I cannot believe that we were that close and didn't get to meet.  **sigh** 

I stood and watched the Pirate Reprise.... Congrats on the invite back!!!

I'd love to be able to be a participant at one of the faires.  So did ya happen to see the pirate Cap'n running about with black and red skirts and a red corset and a black tricorn with peacock feathers?  I was with me ma so I was on me best behavior.  Ok.. except when I was giving Sir Eric a rough time. 

Hmmmmmmmmmm... may need to check later to see what ones are not coming back... mayhaps there be a hope for me after all.  Although I don't know I'm really starting to think maybe the way to go is to can the vendor thing and just try to get a job there.  I be attempting to get a job at Pa Ren at the end of the month.  At least maybe I can make enough to pay for my gas. 

Again I'm sorry I missed ye.

Yours aye

Kat

Arrr...bloody Fates!

That were YOU?!?

I got's a shiner on me nose from runnin' inta a pole thanks ta ye...I were turnin' ta take a second look-see, and WHAM!

Aye, it's always bein' fun to hassle Sir Eric...but did ye be knowin' that he and Sir Lucas are (so far's as I knows) the two top honchos of ImpactJousters? They prob'ly be the ones ye be speakin' with ta get a booth...and they also be at PARF...don't quite know what their status be there, asides jousters...

Did ye get a chance to give a listen ta Empty Hats? I thought they were bein' a fine group...and I think I be in love...with Looney Lucy!

As fer jobs at PARF - iffin ye go ta their website, they be havin' a section called "Jobs" or such like...they usually be booked a year in advance...

Hey, signs up fer the next Endless Mts. Faire - if ye be a performer, we kin terrorize the kiddies together...or, if ye decide ta be a vendor-type, I'll be tellin' the playtrons ta give their custom ta ye...and in turn, ye kin be tellin' 'em all how manly and dashin' that Pyrate Phil be!

Hopefully be seein' ye at PARF!

[Katherine "Kat" Adams]

Ah.... now ye didn't really run into a pole now did ye?! That be me tis me favorite outfit, me own creation I might add.

Empty Hats is actually one of the reasons I actually went to that faire, other than the fact that a bad day at faire is better than any day anywhere else. :)

I did not realize that Sir Eric and Sir Lucas were the two or two of the top "dogs" but had I realized it I'd have made sure to have given Sir Eric enough of a bad time that he would have really taken notice of me. LOL Might have made a difference in being able to perform there next year. (I've along way to go on my dialog and dialect but hey I'm working on it. But I have the outfits. )

I've an interview for PARF this month so wish me luck. I fear I'll need it. (I'll let everyone know how that goes after.)

As for next year at Endless Mountains.... I will most definately be considering signing up. It would be an honor to terrorize the kiddies, and some of the locals **incredibly wicked grin** with ye.

Yours aye

Kat

[PyratePhil]

Fair winds fer yer audition, Mistress Kat.