Grumpy ol' Hawk Rants: How to Ruin a Pirate's Sunday Mornin&#3

[Hawkey]

Lately, me 'earties, forces have bin put to work determined that yers truly, Ricky, th' Hawk o' the Drive, not have a nice day. Indulge me, ye black-hearted scallywags, whilst I elaborate:

There've bin swabs giving me port --- that would be me apartment --- what they calls an "extreme makeover." Actually, these dogs have been in and out o' me house, replasterin', repaintin' and otherwise inspectin' the walls of me domicile. Believe me, mateys --- this Pirate job tends t' be tough, ferocious an' silly. But the only thing that would cause me t' guzzle some rum would be a few Pirate music-makers: concertina, flute, vocals, guitar, fiddle and drinks all around (Diet Coke, mostly).

Look, after Easter, I ain't doin' much until the Coney Island Mermaid Parade, so I wants to see all you Pirate-lovin' good guys out there in June! Then, if ye be nice, I'll spin ya th' yarn that IS The Electric Pirates Story! Stay tuned, shipmates!

Hawkey