Capt. Hedge

Aye! Brings a tear ter th eye! Nary a lovelier site had I seen in a long time. Sorter makes it all worthwhile.

Aye, I foun th story jus a wee bit too much like th firs chapter...by that I mean that it seemed like th same jokes an th same punchlines if yer gets me meanin. I likes the characters, tho...mos honourable men mos of em. Specially that Norrington. Allas liked Norrington most. Good man like him'd make a right excellent pirate. Thought he did, too, mosly. Exceptin that he couldn't shut up bout that Sparrow fella. Anywho, I's gettin off th topic here...again. Mosly liked th story...jus expected new, fresh things what would justify me likin the characters so much th firs time. Seemed like maybe jus a diffrnt version what th firs one was, like told by a diffrent man er somethin along them lines. Aye, t'was good ter see the East Indian Tradin Company th badguys fer a change!

I knowd a man what had a piano in his cabin...pipe organ leastways...famous Cap'n name o Hook.

Aye, an fer loot, check out:

Dead men tell no tales, they gots lots o birthday party stuff...but they also got coins galore! Makes me mouth water ter look at em. An flags which aint no thing to find. Fer weapons, yer might like ter check out:

Pirate Stuff and Guns

I plays a mandolin on occasion...built it meself.

Besides that, I recall when I was a lad, I thought that if I dinna go into piracy I woulda made a fair ter middlin scratch DJ...aye, th boys pokes fun at me about it too.

Well, I wuz born on th islan o Port o Principe...I don know what year tha wuz, but I knows that I was jus a baby at th time. Anyhow...I was born from Irish parents who was killed when I was very young from pirate attack...sos one could say that I always been drawn up with this occupation. Me an me bes frien Hector growed up together as orphans. Hector was a son of a Spaniard, but I never held that again him...I was called Hedgehog from as long as I can recall, owin to me spiky brown hair. So Hector an me, we took to thievin early on, what with no family an no vocation.

Ses Hector one day, as we was lookin at the Danish Schooner Fancy "We orta take tha boat, an hed to sea, away from this tired ol islan" Hector had always ben the tougher o the two of us, an sorta made up all th rules...so I wuz game.

We stowed on board inside some pickle barrels, an dinna come out till we was at sea, in the night. Hector had a pistol what was never loaded an I had an ol cutlass what I stole from some drunk merchant. We took her over rather quickly, since the crew wernt ready fer us. Next thing they knowed, Ol Hector gots his pistol up to the Cap'n's head. But their Quartermaster, he takes a lunge at us, an ol Hector unintentinly showed he'd been bluffin with the pistol. Things ws lookin bad, but for me an my cutlass. Dinna cut no man, but a few lines here an thar an the ol longboat falls down on most o the crew. Thas the same boat we set em adrift in.

Ses Hector, "this ol boat's as quick as that cutlass o yern! Les call her the Cutlass!" He was allas good at rallyin folks by the heart.

Anyhows, we knowd half a dozen good lads what would be game to put to sea, an at Hispaniola we picked us up some o them wild boucans what was willin to sign up too. So we drew up our articles an set out fer fortune.

Well, off Gibraltar we met the French Brigantine Le Mystique She had jus beat off a Spanish Galleon an was all but sunk herself. We come board to board with her an had her in no time. Aye, that was the birth O the Lady Sioux!(may she sail ferever!)

Anyhows, our real problems come from the fact that Le Mystique had an expert carpenter what was willin to sign on with us. Cap'n Hector takes him on what to replace Mr. Charly Banks, what had allas proved an able bodied carpenter. Charly Banks took offense at that, of course...any man would, especially what had come with us from Port O Principe! To make a example, Cap'n Hector shot him...not ded, mind yer, but shot him down none the less.

Well, the crew'd been gettin mighty uneasy bout Cap'n Hectors methods anyhows, an this set em to talkin.

We careened our ships an set to work fixin em up. While we was, Cap'n Hector announced he was gonna command the Sioux(may she sail ferever), an was gonna put me in command o the Cutlass, an that would increase our local influence.

Anyhows, this story's gettin mighty long. The short end o it is that in secret, the crew mostly decides they want me to be Cap'n, an want to hang Cap'n Hector from the bowsprit! When they brought is up to me, they clapped ol Hector in irons an was fixin to unroll the hemp that very instant! Bein as Hector an me had so much histry, I convinced em to let him serve on th Cutlass as a powder monkey er somethin until we could find a place what to set him ashore. An I took over the Lady Sioux(may she sail ferever).

Somehow, that night, wily ol Hector managed for to rally the crew o th Cutlass agains us. We was woke by a full broadside o her labbord guns. Well, Mr. Banks, what was now me quartermaster, dinna waste no time an neither did Hammy me negro gunner. A full broadside from OUR guns had the Cutlass busted open like a coconut an leanin over on her stabbord side. We boarded her an took her in no time at all, especially since most of her crew rejoined our side when things started lookin bad fer em.

Hector an some score o his men what wouldnt admit they was in the wrong ended up marooned with a barrell o water, some salted beef an as many muskets as we could spare...two.

Those men what had served aginst the Sioux(may she sail ferever) each took forty lashes, less one an forfieted their share o the plunder fer a year. Bein mosly good men as they was, that curbed their appetite an set em strait.

So, thas the story...nay, not the WHOLE tale, that'd take up a mighty load o bandwidth indeedy. We had many ventures before we even come to Gibraltar. But thas the bulk o it near as I can recall. Ol Hector swore with his las word what we herd as we was sailin away that one day he'd take back what was his by rights an set us all ablaze in the flames o hell itself what was his right as true Cap'n.

Tis a mighty shame in my mind that two lads what started the whole affair as mates should one day be mortal enemies. Mr. Banks, an indeed many o em still ses we shoulda strung him up...or leastways shot him or somethin humane like that...but I jus coulnna do it. Spaniard tho he was, he was allas there fer me when we was lads. Next time we meets, things may be differnt, whos to say?