First mate Jeramiah

Out of the water staggers a well drunk and tired pyrate. "Bloody ell that were a long swim, ifin it wern't fer me rum nay do I think I would have made it." Collapsing to the sand he grabs a bottle from his vest and takes a long pull from it be for his head hits the sand in a deep slumber.

pass me a fork will ye!

mmmmmmmmm gooey cluster darigold ice cream..... chocolate ice cream with caramel marshmelow cream and chocolate covered peanutes...mmmmmmmmmmmm

*sets 'im self down by the fire* Tis a lovely night anyone care for a smore?

passing traffic..

right then, where did i put that bloody squeeze box?? Ray another rum to help me mind remember and help me playin when i do.

better

well meet there mate, good ta see another fine pyrate buyin' drinks. I'll take a rum ifn ye dont mind ray, here be to ye Master Moon... Cheers!

death comes to us all, swifter and kinder to some, agonizing and painful to others, but then there are those who are dead befor they die.

wow wernt aware there be so much tied into a bit o' extra cloth on me britches where in i can keep me keys safe and me money hid. As fer me garb i have inplace hidden pockes on me jerkin and i also use pouches and i really just like to tuck stuff inside o me jerkin its like one big pocket.

this place have some o' the best food ever!

have a drink on me Scarlet

watching king of the hill

sad

hmmmm... i better start workin out.

So a pyrate stummbles inta a house o god early on a sunday, he seems to interupt the serman and the priest looks at him and asks him to approch the stage.

He surely does fer one doest wish to make god unhappy, the priest looks at him and tells the gathered group that he has lost Jesus, talkin about the pirate.

The priest took the pirate by the back o' the neck and dunked his head in a well o holy water fer a small bit, he pulled him up and asked

"Have you found Jesus?"

Pyrate replys "No" kinda confused.

Again the priest dunks him but hold him for a bit longer, he pulls him out and asks again "have you found Jesus?"

Again the pyrate replys "no" still confused.

Looking quite frustrated the priest grabed the pyrate and dunked him under the water and held him there for near a minute, he pulls him up and in a with mcuh passion in his voice he asks him one more time "HAVE YOU FOUND JESUS?"

Looking quite perplex the pyrate asks the priest, "you sure he fell in there?"

Ifin it weren't fer the likes o them we wouldn't even have a place to play!

well said there mate.

What i found that is quite ta bein some fun is ye get a program o' the fair ye be at, that is if there be a map o' the land inside o' it, and use the map to make it into the treasure map. Ye need at least one other person with ye ta ask the important questions as ye be lookin at yer map.

question one, wheres the x on the map?

answer, theres no x on the map then anyone could find it, its on the ground.

question two, where did ye put the x at?

answer, I remeber i put it in the shade last night after i got out o' the pub

so with em two questions ye can go around yellin at each other while ye ask ifn anyone seen a big x on the ground.

i went to the store the other day

plants

getting ready to cause trouble for the night, whooo party time

wrong time to look at the conversation

So how are all me single mates t'day?

Still single

i be figurin ifn i ran a man through and he didna bleed too much on some fine clothes and the hole not be so big then be assured i be swapin out to the higher class o garb.

Not what this guy's doing!   

I am laughing so effing hard that I started coughing and then my boss came in and saw this guy freaking out and said send that to me right now.... I have been with tears in my eyes for five minutes and God this is funny stuff Jack! and I quote "not what this guy's doing"

i almost peed myself

the refrigerator running