Tudor MercWench Smith Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 As I was lying in bed the other night, deathly ill, I started thinking how funny it could be if I started this here list and see what everyone could come up with. So I'll start it off, and everyone else add anything that pops into their heads. You might be a pirate if . . . ~You go into a bar and try to order Grog ~Anytime someone speaks negativly about pirates, you look at them in all seriousness and respond "You say 'Pirate' like it's a BAD thing!" ~You think Hamlet is Shakespeare's greatest work, not for the depth of Character, but because pirates rescue the hero -Well, that's all I can remeber for now. They seemed funnier the other night. Maybe I was delerious So add to 'em, try and salvage my idea! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Seahawke Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 when yer irritated at some fool's blabbering...yer thoughts go wishing ther be cutlass at yor side so ye can run it through ta poor soul. Lady Cassandra Seahawke Captain of SIREN'S RESURRECTION, Her fleet JAGUAR'S SPIRIT, ROARING LION , SEA WITCH AND RED VIXEN For she, her captains and their crews are.... ...Amazon by Blood... ...... Warrior by Nature...... ............Pirate by Trade............ If'n ye hear ta Trill ye sure to know tat yer end be near... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duchess Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Your pocket knief is a cutlass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Annie Finlay Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 ...you spend hours trying to teach your dog/cat/hamster/gerbil/rabbit to sit on your shoulder and say "pieces of eight!" and "where's the rum?" The Wit and Wisdom of Capt. Jack Sparrow: The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers. Wherever we want to go, we go. That's what a ship is, you know. It's not just a keel and hull and a deck and sails. That's what a ship needs. But what a ship is... what the Black Pearl really is... is freedom. Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid. The only rules that really matter are these: what a man can do and what a man can't do. Will Turner: You cheated. Jack Sparrow: [shrugs] Pirate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the Royaliste Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 You watch the commuter traffic over on dry land, toss the last crab shell o'er the stb'd rail, and smile........... .....Man, are they sweet this year! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Mermaid Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 You get a fish tank just for the moving pirate skeleton decorations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathyrn Ramsey Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 you start calling your children the 'crew' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sealegs Constance Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Aye when leaving someones house ye be saying the ships leaving in 5 minutes iffen yer not there ye be left behind. :) Sealegs Constance I am what I am Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Mermaid Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Your confused about why towing companys need wenches Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merrydeath Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Instead of right and left, you say sta'board and port. Pirate Lass with sass, brass, a cutlass, an a nice *ss. Capt of the FOOLS GOLD PIRATES BLAST BREAST CANCER! GET A MAMMOGRAM AND SAVE YOUR TREASURED CHEST: http://www.myspace.c...iratesthinkpink http://www.myspace.c...oolsgoldpirates CAPT OF THE ONLY PYRITE SHIP AFLOAT: THE FOOL'S GOLD- look for us and Captain Merrydeath on facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. Morgan Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 You wonder why the signs on the head don't read "Mates" and "Wenches"... you also wonder why you almost mess yourself cuz no one knows where to send you when you ask, "Where do I go to use the head??" Touche' Ship's Marksman & Crab Fiend Pyrates of the Coast "All the skill in the world goes out the window if an angel pisses in the flintlock of your musket." "Florida points like a guiding thumb, To the southern isles of rumba and rum, To the mystery cities and haunted seas, Of the Spanish Main and the Caribbees..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PyratePhil Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 ...you say "YO-HO" by reflex downtown, and are suddenly surrounded by ladies of easy virtue... ...you refer to your old car as a "land yacht"... ...your computer desktop has SOMETHING to do with pyrates... ...you can say "arrrgh" and "keel-haul" and not feel self-conscious... ...you have hundreds if not thousands of dollars invested in your Halloween outfit ...but don't see it as a Halloween outfit... ...Qui desiderat pacem, praeparet bellum... ~ Vegetius Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Mermaid Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 ...you say "YO-HO" by reflex downtown, and are suddenly surrounded by ladies of easy virtue... Oh, thats a good one... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merrydeath Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 you say bow and stern to describe some one, you say aye, and you're not saying the alphabet. You have a ship in your back yard and the sea is 1000 miles away. the words Pilfer, Pillage, and Booty come easier to your lips then your kiddy crew's names. You have an anchor on your car to hold it in place for the parking spots. you have more bottles of Rum and Ale then wine and Tums. someone says DVD pirate, and you think its cool. you give your beloved mate cutlasses and guns instead of candies and cards for special days. Pirate Lass with sass, brass, a cutlass, an a nice *ss. Capt of the FOOLS GOLD PIRATES BLAST BREAST CANCER! GET A MAMMOGRAM AND SAVE YOUR TREASURED CHEST: http://www.myspace.c...iratesthinkpink http://www.myspace.c...oolsgoldpirates CAPT OF THE ONLY PYRITE SHIP AFLOAT: THE FOOL'S GOLD- look for us and Captain Merrydeath on facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Santana de la Vega Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 you just might be a pirate: If you'd rather be out ta sea than on the docks If yer sister carries a blunderbus If yer mom's name is Smythe If you can carve wood with a cutlass Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a knife in your back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Hand Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 you have more bottles of Rum and Ale then wine and Tums. Shouldn't that have been ....... Empty Bottles of rum............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crow Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 You tend to use archaic nuatical phrases in yer day to day work . "crack on more sail we're going to be late ." Lord above please send a dove with wings as sharp as razors , to cuts the throats of them there blokes what sells bad booze to sailors .. " Illigitimiti non carborundum . " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duchess Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 You own more scarves and sashes than you have socks. (O'course that could also be "you might be a belly dancer if...") The Duchess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charity Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 You show'm off proudly and regularly "update ' them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merrydeath Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 you have more bottles of Rum and Ale then wine and Tums. Shouldn't that have been ....... Empty Bottles of rum............ All in good time, there Patrick. First they have to be bought and brought home. You hear the word Parrot an think Pirate. You hear the word balloons and think Doubloons. Pieces of Eight mean money and not what some kid did after too much pizza. Pirate Lass with sass, brass, a cutlass, an a nice *ss. Capt of the FOOLS GOLD PIRATES BLAST BREAST CANCER! GET A MAMMOGRAM AND SAVE YOUR TREASURED CHEST: http://www.myspace.c...iratesthinkpink http://www.myspace.c...oolsgoldpirates CAPT OF THE ONLY PYRITE SHIP AFLOAT: THE FOOL'S GOLD- look for us and Captain Merrydeath on facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Hand Posted January 8, 2005 Share Posted January 8, 2005 The weather is icky and snowy, so you wear your pyrate Sea Coat...... because it's the warmest coat you own....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tempest Fitzgerald Posted January 9, 2005 Share Posted January 9, 2005 When stuck in gridlock traffic or are cut off by some s.o.b., you instantly think of how you could mount a "long 9" on you car/truck to handle the situation the next time it happens. ...Or lay these bones in an unworthy urn, Tombless, with no rememberance over them: Either our history shall with full mouth Speak freely of our acts, or else our grave, Like a Turkish mute, shall have a toungueless mouth, Not worshipped with a waxen epitaph... King Henry V- William Shakespeare 'She wore a gown the color of storms, shadows and rain and a necklace of broken promises and regrets.'~Susanna Clarke Attention! All formats of plot and characterizations produced under the monikers "Aurore Devareaux" or "Tempest Fitzgerald" are protected under the statutes of Copyright law. All Rights Reserved. F.T.M. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rumba Rue Posted January 9, 2005 Share Posted January 9, 2005 When your parrot ONLY knows pirate words. (Mine does!) When everything in your car has a skull and crossbones motif. This also includes license plate frames that say, "My other car is a pirate ship." (Got one) When you go to a party and bring your big drinking mug attached to your belt with all the chachkies on it. When you wear your pirate outfit to a church wedding and everybody thinks you look better than the bride. Rumba Rue **If at first you don't succeed, then walking the plank isn't for you** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cap'n Pete Straw Posted January 9, 2005 Share Posted January 9, 2005 you say aye, and you're not saying the alphabet. ...You say "R" and yer not sayin' the alphabet. ...Someone mentions "a vast landscape" and you ask why they are hailing the landscape. ...When looking at Texas on the map, you begin to wonder if there is any significance as to where the large "X" was placed. "He's a Pirate dancer, He dances for money, Any old dollar will do... "He's a pirate dancer, His dances are funny... 'Cuz he's only got one shoe! Ahhrrr!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crimsoncrow Posted January 9, 2005 Share Posted January 9, 2005 Ye find that 90% o' yer house decore carries a nautical theme and most o' that be o' pyrate flavor. When ye give directions, it always be in points o' the compass instead o' left, right, straight. You say, Millers when refering to rats. Terms like, "Kissin' the gunner's daughter" are jus' a part o' everyday conversation. Ye have a better knowledge o' rum than most Barkeeps. Privateer & Commander of "Finnegan's Wake" Faodaidh fearg sealltainn a strigh air cridh an duine ghlic, ach comhnaichdh i an amadain. (Anger may look in on a wise man's heart, but it abides in the heart of a fool.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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